The Bad Advice Thread

[gg1]

In addition, many people from Yorkshire still mourn the short-lived county of Humberside. Should you need to address a letter to East Yorkshire, the recipient will no doubt be extremely grateful if you write "Humberside" as the county.

Similarly any letters sent to addresses in Middlesbrough should always use the correct county name.

Cleveland.

 

[OhNoAPacer]

To show you are not another clichéd tourist when in Scotland be sure to ask for Irish Whisky.

 

[DelayRepay]

There is no need to bring a waterproof coat or umbrella. It very rarely rains in England.

 

[QSK19]

Remember to drive on the right and go round the roundabouts anti-clockwise. Those lot on the Continent just had to drive on the left, didn’t they - Brits could never get used to using their left hand to move the gearstick and handbrake.

Oh, and for those coming to the UK from the Continent, they’ll need to move their clocks an hour forward.

 

[py_megapixel]

There is no need to bring a waterproof coat or umbrella. It very rarely rains in England.

And even if it did rain, any large UK town or settlement will have a variety of department stores that will sell you a coat. Notable brands to look for include BHS, Allders and C&A.

 

[dgl]

Also if you are visiting Liverpool it is customary to go to the nearest local newsagents and by a copy of their favourite newspaper, The Sun. You may have to ask the newsagent for a copy as they sell out quickly but always keep some behind the counter for tourists.

 

[61653 HTAFC]

Also if you are visiting Liverpool it is customary to go to the nearest local newsagents and by a copy of their favourite newspaper, The Sun. You may have to ask the newsagent for a copy as they sell out quickly but always keep some behind the counter for tourists.

Similarly if visiting Sheffield or anywhere in the surrounding region, wearing a Magaret Thatcher t-shirt or pin-badge will mean that your first drink in any hostelry will be on the house.

 

[Bevan Price]

To American visitors: "When visiting Scotland or Wales, remember to tell the locals that they are great parts of England".

 

[Gloster]

If you go to Cowes week, remember that you must bring a cow with you, although a small calf is acceptable. The spelling is just a cute old English variation.

 

[PG]

We are leaders in animal education - be sure to visit the local zoo or wildlife park and ask when they will be taking the Zebras out to learn how to cross the road safely at a Zebra crossing.

 

[Gloster]

If you are from Dallas you may wish to see your home city‘s namesake in Scotland. But beware: the partying never stops!

 

[D6968]

When visiting the Black Country Museum (where a lot of a certain TV Series set in Birmingham was filmed) be sure to compliment the locals on their lovely Birmingham accents, trust me being thrown in the cut (canal) is just a traditional warm Black Country custom.

 

[Busaholic]

Go down to the Old Kent Road and tell the locals how you've always wanted to meet true East End cockneys. Especially ask about their store of amusing stories concerning the beloved Kray Brothers.

 

[gingerheid]

It's a little known fact that, though there are about 6m Scots, the ones that live in England know most of the ones that don't. You can test this knowledge by telling random people with Scottish accents about other Scottish people that you've met and asking if they know them. Remember that the traditional Scottish modesty means it may take a few goes to get the correct answer!!!

The highly prized Scottish banknote is not, despite widespread misconceptions, equal to an English note. You should actually get a slightly favourable exchange rate! It's not much; usually about 2 or sometimes 3p in the £, but it's polite to insist on receiving it as it shows respect for tradition.

 

[Dai Corner]

London cab drivers are great technology enthusiasts and will talk for hours about how the sat nav means they no longer need what they quaintly call 'the knowledge' or how Uber has made booking a ride so much easier.

 

[edwin_m]

If the driving on the left or the right confuses you when on one of our motorways, the best thing to do is to stick to the middle lane. Drivers of other vehicles will flash their headlights in appreciation of your safe driving, and sometimes make hand gestures which should be understood as "we see that you are foreign and welcome you to Britain".

And if driving in cities, yellow markings by the kerb or sometimes hatchings across the whole street mean that this piece of road was accidentally laid with a bad batch of UV-sensitive asphalt, and it should be kept shaded by ensuring that vehicles occupy this area for as much of the time as possible.

 

[py_megapixel]

Further to the above, "KEEP CLEAR" markings on the road are in reference to your windscreen, to remind you that it may need wiping or demisting.

 

[PG]

The highly prized Scottish banknote is not, despite widespread misconceptions, equal to an English note. You should actually get a slightly favourable exchange rate! It's not much; usually about 2 or sometimes 3p in the £, but it's polite to insist on receiving it as it shows respect for tradition.

For an even better deal look out for Bank of Ireland notes as these are highly prized and you will be offered well over face value if you want to swap one for an English note.

 

[DelayRepay]

If you need any help, advice or just want to know what time it is, one of our many friendly police officers will be happy to assist.

But you must show respect to the Police, so please ensure you address the officer appropriately, using the phrase "Oy, Piggy!"

 

[LSWR Cavalier]

People everywhere in the UK are so friendly to visitors, in Yorkshire, North Wales, South Wales, Lancashire, London too etc etc

Anyone doubting this near-universal truth may be informed in no uncertain terms that they are wrong