Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

[Sun Chariot]

Television dramas etc in which the same actors and actresses keep on reappearing. It’s often quite difficult to separate the role which you are now watching from the role they played before that and the one before that and……..

Supposedly there are many actors and actresses out of work. Maybe spread it around a bit.

My wife tunes into a cable channel "Great Romance Movies" and "Great Christmas Movies", full of made for TV American dross.
The same actors and actresses get churned out. Mind you, I think the same bloomin' storyline pretty much gets churned out on them all too...

 

[frankmoh]

I've noticed McDonald's staff try and take your receipt away after you show them your takeaway order. It just annoys me to no end.

Another thing: British people calling takeaway "takeout". My cousin is very guilty of this.

 

[Lewisham2221]

I've noticed McDonald's staff try and take your receipt away after you show them your takeaway order. It just annoys me to no end.

Odd. I find they're not even interested in seeing the receipt. Perhaps they think you're trying to give them your receipt to dispose of?

Another thing: British people calling takeaway "takeout". My cousin is very guilty of this.

Another American TV/film influence. Very annoying.

 

[Strat-tastic]

People from phoning/ ordering online and calling it a takeaway. Surely it's a bringhere!

 

[Sun Chariot]

People from phoning/ ordering online and calling it a takeaway. Surely it's a bringhere!

Ring them up, ask if they do takeaway.
When they say they do, show delight...
Then ask them to pop round and take away your items that can't go in your domestic bins. "Two broken bikes, one rusty barbecue and a mother-in-law who doesn't stop talking".

 

[DelW]

Another thing: British people calling takeaway "takeout". My cousin is very guilty of this.

Though in Scotland, hasn't it long since been a "carry out" ? Phonetically, something akin to kerry-oot.

 

[cb a1]

Though in Scotland, hasn't it long since been a "carry out" ? Phonetically, something akin to kerry-oot.

There is the Tak A Wa in Dundee https://maps.app.goo.gl/H8D64E9ZGtq2dzLE6

 

[DelW]

There is the Tak A Wa in Dundee https://maps.app.goo.gl/H8D64E9ZGtq2dzLE6

There's always an exception to a rule

 

[styles]

There is the Tak A Wa in Dundee https://maps.app.goo.gl/H8D64E9ZGtq2dzLE6

Well it is Dundee after all.

Probably think a carry oot is what happens when you haven't sobered up yet but they need the cell back in the custody suite for someone in more trouble so the officers give you a hand leaving the shop

 

[dcbwhaley]

I've noticed McDonald's staff try and take your receipt away after you show them your takeaway order. It just annoys me to no end.

Whereas the correct expression "To go"

 

[py_megapixel]

A certain large bus company whose name begins with an F, that cancels services but can't be bothered marking them as such in the electronic systems, leaving passengers standing in the cold waiting for a bus that pretends to exist but doesn't.

And then another large bus company, whose name begins with S, that competes with F on the same routes but refuses to accept the tickets of said passengers and charges them for the privilege of getting home half an hour late.

 

[pokemonsuper9]

And then another large bus company, whose name begins with S, that competes with F on the same routes but refuses to accept the tickets of said passengers

Why should one company give free services at their own cost because the other messed up?

 

[Gloster]

When I look at the online catalogue of my local hardware shop to see what makes they have of something I want I type in exactly what I am looking for. However, it gives me a load of irrelevant items, some of them completely unconnected. I want a fan heater, for which it offers nineteen possibilities, of which only two are fan heaters, while seven are other types of heater, which might just about be reasonable to offer. But what have hex coupling nuts, retractable clothes lines and toasters to do with my search?

 

[CaptainHaddock]

When I look at the online catalogue of my local hardware shop to see what makes they have of something I want I type in exactly what I am looking for. However, it gives me a load of irrelevant items, some of them completely unconnected. I want a fan heater, for which it offers nineteen possibilities, of which only two are fan heaters, while seven are other types of heater, which might just about be reasonable to offer. But what have hex coupling nuts, retractable clothes lines and toasters to do with my search?

And while we're talking about online searches, when your search engine asks you "did you mean (something else)?" when you didn't.

A typical example is when, as a real ale drinker I type in CAMRA plus the name of a town to find the best pubs, Google asks if I meant "camera" and brings up a list of photography equipment!

 

[Gloster]

And while we're talking about online searches, when your search engine asks you "did you mean (something else)?" when you didn't.

A typical example is when, as a real ale drinker I type in CAMRA plus the name of a town to find the best pubs, Google asks if I meant "camera" and brings up a list of photography equipment!

Even more infuriating is when it doesn’t give you the option and instead just looks for something spelt similarly. I have put in the word correctly and there is an answer, so answer it! This isn’t artificial intelligence, it is artificial obstruction.

 

[bspahh]

Even more infuriating is when it doesn’t give you the option and instead just looks for something spelt similarly. I have put in the word correctly and there is an answer, so answer it! This isn’t artificial intelligence, it is artificial obstruction.

You can add double quotes around a word, and it will look for that specific word or phrase. You can set this up from the advanced search page https://www.google.co.uk/advanced_search

 

[Sun Chariot]

When I look at the online catalogue of my local hardware shop to see what makes they have of something I want I type in exactly what I am looking for. However, it gives me a load of irrelevant items, some of them completely unconnected. I want a fan heater, for which it offers nineteen possibilities, of which only two are fan heaters.

If it's any consolation, I discovered a similar thing - some 20 years ago - on a well known auction/Buy it now site.
I'd bought a cockerel hand puppet for a friend's child. I must have, at some point, used the search term "fake cockerel" or the abbreviated form.
Because, a subsequent visit to said website, I was faced with a "might also like" reel including - lady toys...

 

[Pakenhamtrain]

All English beer

Any danger of it being poured remotely cold?
I get why us Australians mock you about warm beer now.

 

[Bald Rick]

All English beer

Any danger of it being poured remotely cold?
I get why us Australians mock you about warm beer now.

The most popular english beer, Madri, is always served cold.

 

[DelW]

All English beer

Any danger of it being poured remotely cold?
I get why us Australians mock you about warm beer now.

Numerous varieties of fizzy lager are served cold, so are just as taste-free as Australian beer

Proper cask ale is intended to be served at cellar temperature, usually (I think) around 8 - 10°. This is so that you can actually taste the flavours of malt, hops, etc. that the brewers intended.

Chacun à son goût, as our neighbours say ...

 

[Calthrop]

I had a friend who valued beer for its drunk-making properties, but didn't actually like its taste -- he thus valued its being served icy-cold; and the varieties for which this is the convention.

 

[Sorcerer]

So not quite something I can ban, but certainly in line with things that irritate me. Having a barber that you've been using for twelve years closing down, which though not a big deal for most people is actually a bit of a nightmare for a particularly vain individual not too fond of change like myself. But I suppose as a selfish petty dictator I could also either ban all haircuts that aren't my own, or ban anyone else from having my hairstyle. I haven't decided yet.

 

[Ashley Hill]

I stopped going to the barbers 25 years ago, it seemed pointless paying £3.50 for a grade 1 around what I had left. A trip to Argos for a £15 pair of trimmers that I’m still using has saved me loads of money.

 

[CaptainHaddock]

I stopped going to the barbers 25 years ago, it seemed pointless paying £3.50 for a grade 1 around what I had left. A trip to Argos for a £15 pair of trimmers that I’m still using has saved me loads of money.

Me too. Picked up a pair of head clippers during lockdown and haven't been to a barbers since. Even the Easy Barber chain which used to be the cheapest now charges £7.99 for a men's cut so it's a fair saving.

 

[Gloster]

Such is my lack of hair that nail scissors suffice.

 

[Peter C]

Something I'd ban - news articles which, after a few paragraphs about the event being reported, just copy-and-paste comments from social media. This is particularly bad on Reach-owned 'newspapers' but I've seen a couple of BBC News articles which have done the same and I just don't understand what there is to be gained from it?

-Peter

 

[Topological]

Anything that is not acutally Artificial Intelligence being called Artificial Intelligence - Statistical models are never artificial intelligence.

I would also ban any train from terminating at Cardiff Central

Finally, I would ban concluding sentences that suggest that there has been far more content prior to their appearance.

 

[Ashley Hill]

I would also ban any train from terminating at Cardiff Central

GWR trains do not “terminate “ at Cardiff Central, they “end their journey “. Whoever came up with that is clearly bored in their job.

 

[Gloster]

Companies that regularly send you the same unsolicited offers with the envelopes stuffed with several sheets of paper; a regular offender is Southern Water. Then on the outside of the envelope they suggest you help the environment by recycling all this unwanted paper. If it matters that much, why don’t you recycle it as soon as you have printed it and save the postage, or just…

 

[Pakenhamtrain]

Numerous varieties of fizzy lager are served cold, so are just as taste-free as Australian beer

The only Australian beer over there is Foster's and no one in Australia drinks it.

In Australia we have many flavour beers nice and cold.

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Here's a Balter XPA.

And these are the taps at the Elephant and Wheelbarrow which is a British pub on Bourke street

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All cold beer!