Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

[Fyldeboy]

The waving of EU flags at the Last Night of the Proms.

Mind you, the way things are going, it probably won't be too long before the Last Night of the Proms is banned.

People who can't sing, singing. Banning Last Night of the Proms would help with this - so it gets a thumbs up from me.

Edit: Forum software that doesn't allow you to insert a thumbs up emoticon!

 

[PeterY]

I think I'd ban this thread, I can't believe I've read 2,341 posts . The trouble is I've enjoyed it

 

[61653 HTAFC]

The waving of EU flags at the Last Night of the Proms.

Mind you, the way things are going, it probably won't be too long before the Last Night of the Proms is banned.

That's a good idea, seeing as it's about as entertaining as a sloth race!

 

[Paul Jones 88]

Strictly Come Dancing
Britain's Got Talent
X Factor
Michael MacIntyre Shows
The Masked Singer
The Masked Dancer
And any other stupid chav programs.

 

[Calthrop]

That's a good idea, seeing as it's about as entertaining as a sloth race!

I'd pay good money to see a sloth race ...

 

[birchesgreen]

I'd pay good money to see a sloth race ...

You would certainly get your money's worth

 

[duncanp]

Strictly Come Dancing
Britain's Got Talent
X Factor
Michael MacIntyre Shows
The Masked Singer
The Masked Dancer
And any other stupid chav programs.

Couldn't agree more.

"Other stupid chav programs" includes practically anything on ITV2, such as "Dress To Impress", as well as "The Only Way Is Essex", "Made In Chelsea", and any program whose title begins "..The Real Housewives Of..."

And I would also ban those stupid property programmes such as "..Escape to the Country/Sun/Coast.." etc etc etc.

I cannot stand watching ditsy couples wandering round various houses saying "I don't like this" or "I don't like that", whilst all the time rubbing our noses in it that they have got £750,000 to spend on a property whist millions of us are having sleepless nights worrying about how to pay the mortgage/rent.

 

[43096]

People wanting to ban TV shows because they don’t like them. It’s very simple: don’t watch them in that case.

 

[Ianno87]

People wanting to ban TV shows because they don’t like them. It’s very simple: don’t watch them in that case.

See also: People complaining about YouTube content that they both don't pay for, and have the option of not watching.

(e.g. People complaining about All The Stations in 2017 because it was a "jolly" or not following the "correct" rules etc etc.)

 

[Mag_seven]

People wanting to ban TV shows because they don’t like them. It’s very simple: don’t watch them in that case.

Mary Whitehouse.

 

[Peter Mugridge]

Mary Whitehouse.

I think God banned her in 2001...?

 

[43096]

Mary Whitehouse.

Experience?

 

[adrock1976]

I think God banned her in 2001...?

Experience?

I remember there was a catchphrase not long after the beginning of the show that went "Lovely. Milky, milky".

 

[43096]

I remember there was a catchphrase not long after the beginning of the show that went "Lovely. Milky, milky".

 

[Cowley]

When you forget to shake the ketchup bottle and squirt that weird little bit of water out first by mistake…

 

[HST274]

When you forget to shake the ketchup bottle and squirt that weird little bit of water out first by mistake…

 

[Bevan Price]

After 2,325 posts, is there anything in the world left that isn't banned by this thread?

You ?
Me ?

 

[Gloster]

People who, when you are sitting on a bench eating your lunch, sit down on the same bench and light up. They are usually upwind and tend to stretch their arms out so that the ash off their cigarette is liable to end up in in your food. This is particularly annoying when there are other benches around with nobody using them. (On one occasion at Portsmouth Harbour station, where there are seven or eight benches on Platform 1, I was having a coffee and a sandwich while I waited for the next boat. I was the only person sitting on any of the benches, but a chap still walked down the platform, sat down on the same bench and lit up.)

 

[yorksrob]

When you forget to shake the ketchup bottle and squirt that weird little bit of water out first by mistake…

I think it's called the "expectorate" and yes, I would ban it as well !

 

[nlogax]

Ban ketchup. It's nasty stuff and ruins everything it touches.

 

[xotGD]

Ban ketchup. It's nasty stuff and ruins everything it touches.

We should therefore ban anyone who answers "Red Sauce" in the sausage sandwich game.

 

[Mcr Warrior]

Ban ketchup. It's nasty stuff and ruins everything it touches.

Doesn't it put a shine back on tarnished coins?

 

[61653 HTAFC]

We should therefore ban anyone who answers "Red Sauce" in the sausage sandwich game.

Anyone who actually calls it "Red Sauce" gets a yellow card at least. Admittedly Brown Sauce will confuse any foreigners- it's not exactly a usefully descriptive name... but if you call tomato ketchup "red sauce" I'll probably be surprised you managed to put your socks on in the morning without falling on your face.

 

[SuspectUsual]

Chewing gum

Or if I’m forced to allow it, mandatory prison sentences for people who talk whilst chewing gum, and for people who spit it out onto the pavement

 

[PeterY]

Chewing gum

Or if I’m forced to allow it, mandatory prison sentences for people who talk whilst chewing gum, and for people who spit it out onto the pavement

One reason my father hated/disliked Alex Fergusson.

 

[75A]

Doesn't it put a shine back on tarnished coins?

I thought that was Coca Cola.

 

[Mcr Warrior]

I thought that was Coca Cola.

That, tomato ketchup and brown sauce, apparently!

 

[dgl]

Strictly Come Dancing
Britain's Got Talent
X Factor
Michael MacIntyre Shows
The Masked Singer
The Masked Dancer
And any other stupid chav programs.

Given, from what I understand, it took quite a while to tell that Viking was Morten Harket on the masked singer then you have to wonder who they have on the panels.

Plus talent shows make you sign incredibly restrictive contracts that any sane person would be mad to sign, plus you probably won't get to see the 'real' judges unless they see that you are easily sellable or so bad that you will make Good TV, there are a few rounds of producers First.

 

[D821]

Black Friday.

Buy some stuff at a "low" price, only because they whacked up the prices last month to discount it this month.

And the adverts can do one, too.

 

[Paul Jones 88]

Bone China Jack Russell dogs with pronounced genitalia like the one on the book case that belongs to the sister in law, absolutely awful.