"Too much information?"

[Howardh]

New announcements (all to be done in a Yorkshire accent):
- On boarding: "You're on a train to X, siddown and shudup"
- On arrival at terminating station "We're 'ere, bugger off"
- In case of disruption "It's all gone tits up, god knows when we'll get there"

No other announcements to be made, under any circumstances.

Do these meet everybody's approval?

On Lancashire's trains it's the same...
"Reet, we're goin' Burnley whether tha' likes it or not"
"Can somebugger shovel t'coal on?"
"If tha' want's a drink tha'll have fort' stick tha tongue out ot' winder"
"Aye, and that'll be Twelve Pounds Thruppence"

 

[Cheshire Rover]

New announcements (all to be done in a Yorkshire accent):
- On boarding: "You're on a train to X, siddown and shudup"
- On arrival at terminating station "We're 'ere, bugger off"
- In case of disruption "It's all gone tits up, god knows when we'll get there"

No other announcements to be made, under any circumstances.

Do these meet everybody's approval?

This is a good advert for travel inYorkshire.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6VLYpKGVBU

 

[theotherguard]

"Our next station stop" is another one. Why not just "our next station". If we weren't stopping it would not get a mention.

And another bugbear of mine "we are arriving into London Euston" surely we are arriving "at London Euston" Do TMs get told they have to use this tortured English?

Exactly!
My trains don't "terminate," either! At least not in my announcements. What does that even mean? And my passengers are just that, not "customers."
Less is more and the more the guard drones on the less notice passengers are going to take when we actually need to tell 'em something that matters.

 

[GatwickDepress]

I could have sworn Southern used to run their announcements: "Welcome aboard this Southern service to X" instead of "Welcome aboard the Southern service to X". It might just be me, but the former sounds better.

 

[Sleepy]

and if poor guards did not have to waste time on PA they could find more scroats to sell tickets to !!!

 

[jon0844]

Announcements are necessary for people who are visually impaired and so there's no way they will ever be stopped altogether, nor should anyone expect or ask them to be. However, they can be restricted to important information like stopping patterns, next station etc.

The safety information is potentially awkward as if you were unable to see very well, you'd possibly be unlikely to easily read the safety posters.

 

[Statto]

Merseyrail are really irritating for this, & now Merseyrail have automated announcements on the train how to use escalators.

 

[trainophile]

Merseyrail are really irritating for this, & now Merseyrail have automated announcements on the train how to use escalators.

... which no-one listens to, going by the number of people who don't "stand on the right" .

 

[Flamingo]

... which no-one listens to, going by the number of people who don't "stand on the right" .

Well, who is going to not lean towards the Left in Liverpool (political joke No. 1 )

 

[trainophile]

Well, who is going to not lean towards the Left in Liverpool (political joke No. 1 )

Very good .

 

[dubscottie]

You think its bad in the UK? On any Irish Rail service (inc DART) we get it in English and in Irish also..

On the DART sometimes its funny because the announcement does not do its bit before the next station.. And it is saying for example "next station Lansdowne Road" in irish when we have already arrived in Sandymount.. Same with the LUAS.. Thankfully I go by 2 wheels but would get right on my ****er if I had to listen to it day in day out..

 

[LE Greys]

You think its bad in the UK? On any Irish Rail service (inc DART) we get it in English and in Irish also..

On the DART sometimes its funny because the announcement does not do its bit before the next station.. And it is saying for example "next station Lansdowne Road" in irish when we have already arrived in Sandymount.. Same with the LUAS.. Thankfully I go by 2 wheels but would get right on my ****er if I had to listen to it day in day out..

One presumes that they have similar problems in Wales.

 

[Hyphen]

One presumes that they have similar problems in Wales.

A Cardiff-Shrewsbury HOWL service can often depart before the announcements have finished.

 

[Hellfire]

I was on a VT service the other day and the female train manager told us on departure that the train only stopped at Preston and Glasgow and said nothing else for two hours at which point she told us we were approaching Preston. Very peaceful

 

[PHILIPE]

A Cardiff-Shrewsbury HOWL service can often depart before the announcements have finished.

At which station ?

 

[Hyphen]

At which station ?

Cardiff, should have said!

 

[PHILIPE]

I was travelling on a train today and a"Safety Information" automated announcement was made where passengers were asked to read the safety information poste for your safety. There was a stampede of people towards the end of the coach in a rush to read the information. It was extremely hazardous because passengers were carrying all their luggage with them having been asked to keep it with them at all times..
If these announcements really did have this effect safety would have rather pear shaped.

 

[A-driver]

I was travelling on a train today and a"Safety Information" automated announcement was made where passengers were asked to read the safety information poste for your safety. There was a stampede of people towards the end of the coach in a rush to read the information. It was extremely hazardous because passengers were carrying all their luggage with them having been asked to keep it with them at all times..
If these announcements really did have this effect safety would have rather pear shaped.

Whilst I completely agree that all the rubbish we are told to say in announcements is way over the top and no one listens, it is said simply to stop people trying to blame the railway for not telling them stuff when things go wrong. Much like a frequent flyer will switch off during the safety brief.

If the train catches fire and someone jumps straight out of the external door and gets squashed by a train on the adjacent line or fried on the juice rail then when their family sue the railway they can say 'if he had read the safety posters like we told him to then he would have known to remain on the train and use the internal door to go to the next carriage' as that's what the safety posters say.

In a similar way that if someone gets on, leaves their bag in the overhead rack, goes to the toilet/buffet etc and on return finds it has been nicked and taken off by someone at a station then once again they can't try and blame the railway company for not protecting their bag.

Unfortunately everything is like that now-Coffee cups warn you the contents may be hot, peanuts carry a nut allergy warning etc. - every industry has to pander to those with no common sense for fear of being sued when someone walks into a wall because no one has stuck a huge warning notice on it surrounded by sirens and flashi lights in huge yellow and black writing saying 'warning, do not walk into this wall'...

 

[Asian Demon]

Whilst I completely agree that all the rubbish we are told to say in announcements is way over the top and no one listens, it is said simply to stop people trying to blame the railway for not telling them stuff when things go wrong. Much like a frequent flyer will switch off during the safety brief.

If the train catches fire and someone jumps straight out of the external door and gets squashed by a train on the adjacent line or fried on the juice rail then when their family sue the railway they can say 'if he had read the safety posters like we told him to then he would have known to remain on the train and use the internal door to go to the next carriage' as that's what the safety posters say.

In a similar way that if someone gets on, leaves their bag in the overhead rack, goes to the toilet/buffet etc and on return finds it has been nicked and taken off by someone at a station then once again they can't try and blame the railway company for not protecting their bag.

Unfortunately everything is like that now-Coffee cups warn you the contents may be hot, peanuts carry a nut allergy warning etc. - every industry has to pander to those with no common sense for fear of being sued when someone walks into a wall because no one has stuck a huge warning notice on it surrounded by sirens and flashi lights in huge yellow and black writing saying 'warning, do not walk into this wall'...

Hit the nail on the head. Sadly common sense really isn't all that common.

 

[tsr]

At Kings Cross today, the announcement instructed us that "For reasons of safety and security, please keep all your personal belongings with you and IN YOUR SIGHT at all times" (emphasis not mine). The announcement then went on about the security services disposing of things, avoiding disruption, and generally not doing anything that may result in you needing the services of the Lost Property people. By this time, they had missed the slot to announce a service which was nominally going to Foxton.

I shall duly make a careful habit of wheeling my suitcase in front of me, in case my spare trousers get gunned down outside WH Smith. I shall also ask for details in large-print Portuguese of why Transec require passengers miss their trains.

There has to be a point at which you stop catering for stupid people. Some of these announcements are covering things that you would surely be thrown out of court for suing a TOC/NR about. On the other hand, supposing they overrode the entire set of announcements for a platform alteration to a long-distance service, and thirty people on Advances had to be found seats on another train - rather than the Foxton train's first announcement.

Really, though, we are all going over the same points and debate over and over again, sadly.

 

[BestWestern]

Just to add my tuppence worth, from a Guard's point of view.

The Transec announcement is not one that I enjoy making, for several reasons. I find the instruction not to leave ANY items unattended, on stations OR ON TRAINS, ridiculous. If your suitcase is in a luggage rack at the end of the coach and you are in your seat 30 feet away, then it is unattended. When the buffet staff then entice you to walk 5 coaches and buy a coffee, we do not seriously expect you to drag your luggage with you and so, again, the luggage is unattended. This is normal practice, and so you do have to wonder what is the purpose of the previous announcement? And one can't help but imagine that anybody in the business of leaving something dodgy on a train is probably going to put it in the rack along with everybody else's suitcases, rather than leave it alarmingly 'unattended' stuffed behind a toilet and ticking loudly. Similarly, what does the average rail passenger, travelling in a packed train with hundreds of other completely random people, deem to be 'suspicious'? Anything sufficiently worrying to spur somebody into reporting it is likely to warrant such a response with or without an announcement to encourage them. Nevertheless, we are told we must do it and so...

My preference for announcements is to offer a welcome aboard, state the service and it's calling points (on leaving major stations or where a large number of people have boarded) and scheduled arrival time at the end point (lots of people ask this, so clearly it is relevant). I will point out where the quiet coaches are and remind people of what this means (we have been told this isn't important, but I disagree having found plenty who were completely unaware of where they were sitting and blissfully annoying everybody else in the coach) and, depending on how keen my buffet staff are, I will advise people of where the refreshments can be found if I don't hear the steward do it.

Minding the gap is something which should be mentioned only at those places where the gap is abnormally large, in which cases it is well worth mentioning. As for leaving stuff behind.... Many people moan about it many times, and I can understand why. However, I find many, many things left behind on my trains, and so I consider that there might be even more if I didn't irritatingly remind people not to forget things every now and again

 

[A-driver]

There certainly is an argument for limiting the quantity and content of announcments-I seem to remember it being discussed when I was a trainee.

If you do too much talking the public switch off and then if you need to make an important announcment (diversion, alteration, emergency etc) you find that no one is listening.

But we are still then given loads of compulsory announcments.

Plus you get people on twitter saying that they want every stop announced on 313s when its dark as they don't know where they are and recently we have been asked to read off an announcment if BTP get on the train.

 

[jon0844]

I know FCC has improved signs and lighting at many stations, but I really do think announcing stations when it's dark on a 313 is very valuable.

But it's more so in the evening peak in the winter than late at night. In the peak the trains can be VERY crowded as you know only too well. It's actually quite hard to see out when it's very busy, so you then rely on asking others what station it is - and they often then struggle to see too when it's dark outside!

On a late night train, it's far, far easier to look out (although I realise there are the people who might be visually impaired and still need some announcement) as you can simply walk over to a window.

I am actually disappointed that the 313s never got an automated CIS when they got CCTV fitted.

 

[A-driver]

To be perfectly honest announcing every station on a 313 is not practicle unless they had a guard on board. I tried it on one trip and it really dosnt work from a drivers point if view.

 

[W230]

To be perfectly honest announcing every station on a 313 is not practicle unless they had a guard on board. I tried it on one trip and it really dosnt work from a drivers point if view.

It's the same on 319's. I can't see any need for me to announce every station to Brighton when leaving Flitwick or wherever.

I think one of the announcements that annoys me most on the TL side is the repeated message on the platforms saying "FCC have reduced crime at stations by 30% blah blah blah..." Exactly what bearing does that have on anything to do with the journey?!

 

[transmanche]

It's the same on 319's. I can't see any need for me to announce every station to Brighton when leaving Flitwick or wherever.

No, I don't think anyone advocates that. But announcing the name of the station on arrival at that station - and doing that at every station - is what I think is needed.

A simple "This is Flitwick. This train is for Brighton, the next station is Luton" is all that's required.

 

[A-driver]

No, I don't think anyone advocates that. But announcing the name of the station on arrival at that station - and doing that at every station - is what I think is needed.

A simple "This is Flitwick. This train is for Brighton, the next station is Luton" is all that's required.

As I say, its just not practicle for the driver to so that-I have tried it. I'm not going to debate it but we have enough to do when stopping at stations, opening doors, closing doors etc without picking up the pa everywhere aswell.

The only time I announce stations is when booked to skip stations where I announce the next calling point and also at interchange stations.

 

[tsr]

I think one of the announcements that annoys me most on the TL side is the repeated message on the platforms saying "FCC have reduced crime at stations by 30% blah blah blah..." Exactly what bearing does that have on anything to do with the journey?!

It means they can reduce crime even further - as soon as you concentrate on that announcement, you can be targeted by pickpockets, and then they can get the BTP to arrest them just before they nick your stuff. Brilliant for the stats - "we just caught them, you see, before they could commit an offence"...

Another one is "During the last year, x number of people have been injured by tripping or falling on our stations" - to which I normally like to think I should add "because they been either distracted or bored out of their minds by the CIS system, and have thus either fallen over the little step the contractors put in, or tried to jump down a whole escalator"

 

[A-driver]

It means they can reduce crime even further - as soon as you concentrate on that announcement, you can be targeted by pickpockets, and then they can get the BTP to arrest them just before they nick your stuff. Brilliant for the stats - "we just caught them, you see, before they could commit an offence"...

Another one is "During the last year, x number of people have been injured by tripping or falling on our stations" - to which I normally like to think I should add "because they been either distracted or bored out of their minds by the CIS system, and have thus either fallen over the little step the contractors put in, or tried to jump down a whole escalator"

My favourite FCC one is the one about staff assaults not being tolerated. They seem to play it constantly during disruption and its very awkward when there is a platform full of people who will be late for work, no train in sight, I walk onto the platform in uniform and they make that announcment!

I always feel like turning round to everyone and saying 'yeah...so don't try it!'

 

[transmanche]

As I say, its just not practicle for the driver to so that-I have tried it.

Oh I understand on DOO services, there's plenty of other things to think about. But there's definitely no need to list every calling point at each station!

My suggestion was really for a hypothetical ideal PIS, one that doesn't descend into spouting masses of 'aural graffiti'.