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Something I have got to get off my chest

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IanPooleTrains

Established Member
Joined
21 Nov 2010
Messages
1,217
Location
Brereton, Rugeley, Staffordshire
Right then, I have thought long and hard about something for a couple of days now and it seems that I need to get a hell of a lot off of my chest regarding myself so, if you are all sitting down and paying attention, we will begin

Some of you on here have met me in person, a lot of you haven’t met me in person but for a minority, not the majority, but the minority, you seem to have drawn an opinion of me based on some of the things that I have wrote, some of the things that I have said and some of the things that go through my head. First of all, anything in anything that I post is either my opinion, my view or the first thing that comes into my head. If I am wrong on that, then some of you have corrected me accordingly while other seem fit to make a joke out of me, a mockery, some have even gone so far as to degrade me publicly and personally. My comment to that is, who the hell do you people think you are? I don’t go around making a mockery of some people, I don’t go around making up parodical names of other people and I damn sure don’t go around and slag you off in public. If I have a problem with you or anything you have wrote, I go and I click that nice little button that reports some of the things you have said. If I come with a query, what I don’t expect is people to take what I say as a joke and then go on and continue to slag me off publically resulting in threads that have not been reconciled or given any solutions being closed. That is just a waste of my time, your time and the time of everyone else.

Now when I first came to these forums, I didn’t have to come to these forums, I could have gone somewhere else but it was my brother that introduced me to these forums and I thought, you know what, it looks like fun. Come on here, meet new people, a bit of friendly banter, no hassle, no fuss. Problem is though, it seems that that is always following me everywhere that I post and I don’t think that that is fair on the people that use this page as well as other people. Sometimes, I might bring it on myself but other times, I am needlessly minding my own business and some people then decide that they wanna take a cheap shot, you wanna take a swipe, you wanna anger the dog a little bit more but the problem with that is that sooner or later, that dog is going to bite, that dog is going to attack and come back. If people have a big problem with me, if you have an issue with me, like I have told you, you hit that report button and you report me but what you don’t do is you continue to take shot after shot and expect nothing to happen. I am an honest person, if I have a problem with someone and I have had a personal problem with one person on this forums and I dealt with him like a man, I didn’t hide, I didn’t cower, I didn’t back down and I kept going until we resolved the situation. We might not be friends, we might not like each other but for the sake of the forums, I put petty differences aside, was the bigger man and apologised and we moved on. I’d like to think that if we do ever meet, and hopefully we will, that I look this person right in the eye and I said sorry for everything that I might have said or thought about him, publically shake his hand and then forget the whole thing. I would like to think that that is going to happen with some people on here but why should I even bother when I am always the centre of jokes? I like a joke as much as the next person but when people take it too far, that is when it is time to call it quits and stop.

Now all of you wanna now a bit about me, let me tell you about me! I have had success all my life, I don’t go around bragging about it, I get on with my life, I am an honest down to earth person, I am not afraid to speak my mind, I would look the devil right in his face and laugh at him given half the chance but these last few years have been some of the hardest of my life. Three years ago, I weighed myself and that said 28 stone, 28 and at that point, I looked myself in the mirror and I told myself that that would be the end of it and I have gone through three years of mental, physical and personal trauma to get my weight down to 18 and a half stone and let me tell you all one thing, it has been a damn good thing that I have done because I have got so much more belief and confident in myself that if you compared me three years ago to me now, you wouldn’t even notice the difference. These last eighteen month, I have been battling an unknown chest problem, I have been to doctors, i have been to hospitals, I have been to physicians, I have been everywhere possible and nobody knows what the hell is wrong with me. Friday, I go and get some anaesthetic put in my chest and then, two cortisone injections in the most painful areas, during that time, I am going to go through things I wouldn’t even wish on my worst enemy but yet some of you feel the need to use that for more ammo. Some of you think that that is just another big joke but let me tell you all right now, I sure as hell don’t take it as a joke, I sure as hell don’t take my medical problems as a joke and I haven’t in the last five years! What gives you people the right to do that? What gives you people the right to take the mick about someone’s health problems? In fact, what gives you the right full stop?

I have thought about this now since Friday and believe me, with not a lot to do, I have had a lot of time to reflect and this is not fair to those seven guys that run this forum. Those seven guys who run this forum give their time, their effort and their blood, sweat and tears to make a forum that they have to keep cleaning up a lot of people’s mess so here is what I am gonna do. I am gonna take a bit of a sabbatical, I am going to take a bit of time away from these forums to do a few things. The first of those things is to get fully healthy and to get everything in order. The second of those things is to give you people that have been taking the you know what a bit of time to reflect, a bit of time to think about everything you have said, a bit of time to actually step back yourselves and think. This will mean that the West Midlands Day Ranger meet that I was going to come on, I will now not be going on and not through the temptation that if I met some of you people, I would punch you in the mouth but out of respect for the other people that want to go on that and have fun. It also means that the application that I put in to become moderator, which I have already informed people of, will become invalid as well.

I actually hoped it wouldn’t come to this but let me tell all those people that do like me something. This is not the last time you will see me, you might see me out and about in the street, on a train station, in a pub, in a cafe and you are more than welcome to come up, have a chat, have a laugh and have a joke but this is by no means the last time you will see me on these forums.

I wanna give a special message to all seven mods that run this forum and that is you do a hell of a job, you do something that allows fun loving guys like myself, like my brother, like all those other people out there a chance to come on here and query or add their POV and my respect goes out to each and every single one of you. We might not have seen eye to eye on a lot of things but you guys do a hell of a job and you have all my respect.

Peace out

IanPooleTrains aka Ian Poole
 
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RailUK Forums

Ivo

Established Member
Joined
8 Jan 2010
Messages
7,307
Location
Bath (or Southend)
Ian,

I know that some on here have failed to see eye-to-eye with you on several occasions, and that even some of the more senior members have been difficult towards you at times, but please know that this is true of far from all of us. You even appear to accept as much, which is a good start! I personally have only ever met you once, which was on the Marston Vale journey in February (when we referred to you as "Hat" because of your distinctive yellow woolly hat), and even then I could tell that although some may not agree, you were a generally nice guy. You seemed like a knowledgeable person who had a clear passion for the railways, and also for photography; to illustrate the point, your recent video of Princess Elizabeth and others was of the higest quality.

I for one know that you have always meant well, and that would also go for essentially anyone else here who feels the same way as Ian, and have often found your posts to be something to look for if I needed an unusual source of humour. Please be assured that this is not likely to change any time soon, and that I for one have always enjoyed your input.

Lastly, if I may, I would like to congratulate you on such a collosal weight loss; 9½st is nothing short of an impressive success, and an outstanding effort. Similarly, I sincerely hope that your health improves as well.

If you feel that a sabbatical really is your best option, then during the interim period I wish you all the best, and look forward to your impending return.

Ivo (Scott) :smile:
 

Harlesden

Member
Joined
23 Jun 2010
Messages
968
Location
LONDON NW10
I am sure that the majority of members of this forum had no knowledge of Mr. Pooles' anguish over his weight or his medical problem until he himself drew attention to it.
I am not aware of any inappropriate attitude in respect of Mr. Poole or his posts.
You need a rather thick skin to participate in any forum - whether a transport forum, a music forum or Yahoo! Answers. You have to be prepared for the occasional hostile response to a post, and be fully prepared to accept criticism whether constructive or otherwise. There are always one or two jokers on any forum but forum staff usually keep them in check.
I am not sure what Mr. Poole is seeking to achieve by his "getting it off my chest" post. Many of us have at least one "overweight" friend, co-worker or acquaintance whom we treat just the same as any other friend, co-worker or acquaintance.
I'm sure we all wish Mr. Poole well and look forward to his return.
 

First class

Established Member
Joined
9 Aug 2008
Messages
2,731
I think you just need to chill out and remember that people don't form opinions based on nothing!

Any opinions that are formed of you are just that, opinions. You have to get used to that in life. Surely if you are/were 28 stone, you will have had to put up with a lot of that in life already... so you do understand that people can be misjudged easily based on first opinions...

I read your posts with a degree of scepticism and sometimes serious disbelief, and as a result I've formed an opinion your posts are unreliable. It's just my opinion though! I wouldn't get hung up about it!

I'm not sure your weight here is the issue at all... your attitude in your very detailed post above reflects that you feel everyone is against you for no good reason.... maybe you'll reflect and revisit that view.
 

Minilad

Established Member
Joined
26 Feb 2011
Messages
4,398
Location
Anywhere B link goes
To be honest I don't think I have ever seen your weight or health mentioned by anyone on the forum. They have commented on certain posts and threads you have made though.
I guess peoples opinions come from the tone and attitude you displayed in those posts and nothing else.
I think a sabbatical is probably a good idea as it might give you time to chill out a bit and have a think about how you come across when posting
 

90019

Established Member
Joined
29 May 2008
Messages
6,891
Location
Featherstone, West Yorkshire
I want to make a couple of points here, and I'm going to be blunt.
If you don't like that, in all honesty, I couldn't care less.

I didn’t have to come to these forums

Quite.

Sometimes, I might bring it on myself but other times, I am needlessly minding my own business and some people then decide that they wanna take a cheap shot, you wanna take a swipe, you wanna anger the dog a little bit more but the problem with that is that sooner or later, that dog is going to bite, that dog is going to attack and come back.

You know what?
Man the f*ck up. If you really care what people on the internet think of you, you need to take a step back and look at your priorities.
Don't go on about this dog biting bullsh*t, if you're gonna allow yourself to be provoked, then that's your problem and no one elses.

I have had a personal problem with one person on this forums and I dealt with him like a man, I didn’t hide, I didn’t cower, I didn’t back down and I kept going until we resolved the situation. We might not be friends, we might not like each other but for the sake of the forums, I put petty differences aside, was the bigger man and apologised and we moved on.

Good for you.
Honestly though, get over it. It's not the most amazing thing in the world that no one else has ever done. Lots of people manage to do that all the time, it's really not that big a big deal.

I’d like to think that if we do ever meet, and hopefully we will, that I look this person right in the eye and I said sorry for everything that I might have said or thought about him, publically shake his hand and then forget the whole thing.

This post isn't all negative, so hopefully you will.

I would like to think that that is going to happen with some people on here but why should I even bother when I am always the centre of jokes?

Always?
I'm aware of one.
Granted, one that's getting somewhat tedious, but really, it's not the end of the world.
Seriously, just ignore it and don't respond. If you let it get to you, that's when the problems start.

I like a joke as much as the next person but when people take it too far, that is when it is time to call it quits and stop.

This, I agree with.

Now all of you wanna now a bit about me, let me tell you about me! I have had success all my life, I don’t go around bragging about it

So, why'd you just tell everyone on here that?
I don't need to know that, and frankly, I don't care.

Three years ago, I weighed myself and that said 28 stone, 28 and at that point, I looked myself in the mirror and I told myself that that would be the end of it and I have gone through three years of mental, physical and personal trauma to get my weight down to 18 and a half stone and let me tell you all one thing, it has been a damn good thing that I have done because I have got so much more belief and confident in myself that if you compared me three years ago to me now, you wouldn’t even notice the difference.

Good, you've done really well, and I'm sure it's been a massive boost.

These last eighteen month, I have been battling an unknown chest problem, I have been to doctors, i have been to hospitals, I have been to physicians, I have been everywhere possible and nobody knows what the hell is wrong with me.

I'm sure they'll find out what it is eventually.

I am going to go through things I wouldn’t even wish on my worst enemy but yet some of you feel the need to use that for more ammo. Some of you think that that is just another big joke but let me tell you all right now, I sure as hell don’t take it as a joke, I sure as hell don’t take my medical problems as a joke and I haven’t in the last five years! What gives you people the right to do that? What gives you people the right to take the mick about someone’s health problems? In fact, what gives you the right full stop?

It started off so well, and then descended into this.
Prior to this, I'm not aware of people knowing about your weight or medical problems. You've brought them in here, essentially to victimise yourself.

I have thought about this now since Friday and believe me, with not a lot to do, I have had a lot of time to reflect and this is not fair to those seven guys that run this forum. Those seven guys who run this forum give their time, their effort and their blood, sweat and tears to make a forum that they have to keep cleaning up a lot of people’s mess so here is what I am gonna do.

Eight ;)

I am gonna take a bit of a sabbatical, I am going to take a bit of time away from these forums to do a few things. The first of those things is to get fully healthy and to get everything in order.

If it's what you need, it's no bad thing.

I will now not be going on and not through the temptation that if I met some of you people, I would punch you in the mouth but out of respect for the other people that want to go on that and have fun.

Oh, for crying out loud.

I actually hoped it wouldn’t come to this

:roll:

but this is by no means the last time you will see me on these forums.

Good.
Give it time.
What I will say though, if you let people get to you like that, then you're going to cause yourself a lot of problems.

Peace out

IanPooleTrains aka Ian Poole

I suppose I should share my opinion.
I don't mind you. I have no real issues with you. If I'm honest, you don't tend to appear on my radar that often, but that's the case for most people on here, so nothing bad.
The only other points I do have to make are that if you need the time away from here, just go do it, it's for your own benefit after all, from what you say, it's been a tough few years, and you've done well, but please, stop the self victimisation, it's rather pathetic.
 
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deltic1989

Established Member
Joined
21 Sep 2010
Messages
1,483
Location
Nottingham
I've noticed that some people have shown undue hostility towards ian and other members. Unfortunately there are some people who inhabit forums simply to give people a hard time. I enjoy every second I spend about these forums because of the wealth of information I gain and the knowldgeable people I have the privilage of talking to, i hope and very much look forward to meet some of you one day. The internet is a place where people seem to get away with being tw*ts more easily than other places. I for one have always enjoyed your input Ian and found your postings very informative. I hope you will accept my best wishes for a speedy recovery and look forward to seeing you back soon in good health. All the best Chris (deltic1989)
 

SouthEastern-465

Established Member
Joined
24 May 2009
Messages
1,660
Location
Greater London
Right then, I have thought long and hard about something for a couple of days now and it seems that I need to get a hell of a lot off of my chest regarding myself so, if you are all sitting down and paying attention, we will begin

Some of you on here have met me in person, a lot of you haven’t met me in person but for a minority, not the majority, but the minority, you seem to have drawn an opinion of me based on some of the things that I have wrote, some of the things that I have said and some of the things that go through my head. First of all, anything in anything that I post is either my opinion, my view or the first thing that comes into my head. If I am wrong on that, then some of you have corrected me accordingly while other seem fit to make a joke out of me, a mockery, some have even gone so far as to degrade me publicly and personally. My comment to that is, who the hell do you people think you are? I don’t go around making a mockery of some people, I don’t go around making up parodical names of other people and I damn sure don’t go around and slag you off in public. If I have a problem with you or anything you have wrote, I go and I click that nice little button that reports some of the things you have said. If I come with a query, what I don’t expect is people to take what I say as a joke and then go on and continue to slag me off publically resulting in threads that have not been reconciled or given any solutions being closed. That is just a waste of my time, your time and the time of everyone else.

Now when I first came to these forums, I didn’t have to come to these forums, I could have gone somewhere else but it was my brother that introduced me to these forums and I thought, you know what, it looks like fun. Come on here, meet new people, a bit of friendly banter, no hassle, no fuss. Problem is though, it seems that that is always following me everywhere that I post and I don’t think that that is fair on the people that use this page as well as other people. Sometimes, I might bring it on myself but other times, I am needlessly minding my own business and some people then decide that they wanna take a cheap shot, you wanna take a swipe, you wanna anger the dog a little bit more but the problem with that is that sooner or later, that dog is going to bite, that dog is going to attack and come back. If people have a big problem with me, if you have an issue with me, like I have told you, you hit that report button and you report me but what you don’t do is you continue to take shot after shot and expect nothing to happen. I am an honest person, if I have a problem with someone and I have had a personal problem with one person on this forums and I dealt with him like a man, I didn’t hide, I didn’t cower, I didn’t back down and I kept going until we resolved the situation. We might not be friends, we might not like each other but for the sake of the forums, I put petty differences aside, was the bigger man and apologised and we moved on. I’d like to think that if we do ever meet, and hopefully we will, that I look this person right in the eye and I said sorry for everything that I might have said or thought about him, publically shake his hand and then forget the whole thing. I would like to think that that is going to happen with some people on here but why should I even bother when I am always the centre of jokes? I like a joke as much as the next person but when people take it too far, that is when it is time to call it quits and stop.

Now all of you wanna now a bit about me, let me tell you about me! I have had success all my life, I don’t go around bragging about it, I get on with my life, I am an honest down to earth person, I am not afraid to speak my mind, I would look the devil right in his face and laugh at him given half the chance but these last few years have been some of the hardest of my life. Three years ago, I weighed myself and that said 28 stone, 28 and at that point, I looked myself in the mirror and I told myself that that would be the end of it and I have gone through three years of mental, physical and personal trauma to get my weight down to 18 and a half stone and let me tell you all one thing, it has been a damn good thing that I have done because I have got so much more belief and confident in myself that if you compared me three years ago to me now, you wouldn’t even notice the difference. These last eighteen month, I have been battling an unknown chest problem, I have been to doctors, i have been to hospitals, I have been to physicians, I have been everywhere possible and nobody knows what the hell is wrong with me. Friday, I go and get some anaesthetic put in my chest and then, two cortisone injections in the most painful areas, during that time, I am going to go through things I wouldn’t even wish on my worst enemy but yet some of you feel the need to use that for more ammo. Some of you think that that is just another big joke but let me tell you all right now, I sure as hell don’t take it as a joke, I sure as hell don’t take my medical problems as a joke and I haven’t in the last five years! What gives you people the right to do that? What gives you people the right to take the mick about someone’s health problems? In fact, what gives you the right full stop?

I have thought about this now since Friday and believe me, with not a lot to do, I have had a lot of time to reflect and this is not fair to those seven guys that run this forum. Those seven guys who run this forum give their time, their effort and their blood, sweat and tears to make a forum that they have to keep cleaning up a lot of people’s mess so here is what I am gonna do. I am gonna take a bit of a sabbatical, I am going to take a bit of time away from these forums to do a few things. The first of those things is to get fully healthy and to get everything in order. The second of those things is to give you people that have been taking the you know what a bit of time to reflect, a bit of time to think about everything you have said, a bit of time to actually step back yourselves and think. This will mean that the West Midlands Day Ranger meet that I was going to come on, I will now not be going on and not through the temptation that if I met some of you people, I would punch you in the mouth but out of respect for the other people that want to go on that and have fun. It also means that the application that I put in to become moderator, which I have already informed people of, will become invalid as well.

I actually hoped it wouldn’t come to this but let me tell all those people that do like me something. This is not the last time you will see me, you might see me out and about in the street, on a train station, in a pub, in a cafe and you are more than welcome to come up, have a chat, have a laugh and have a joke but this is by no means the last time you will see me on these forums.

I wanna give a special message to all seven mods that run this forum and that is you do a hell of a job, you do something that allows fun loving guys like myself, like my brother, like all those other people out there a chance to come on here and query or add their POV and my respect goes out to each and every single one of you. We might not have seen eye to eye on a lot of things but you guys do a hell of a job and you have all my respect.

Peace out

IanPooleTrains aka Ian Poole

And why do you feel the urge to prove yourself to some idiots on a forum? Tell you what mate take no notice of some of the idiots you get on hear most cases they group up no win situation. Aslong as you know something don't care what else says thinks.

 

GB

Established Member
Joined
16 Nov 2008
Messages
6,562
Location
Somewhere
Seriously, punching in the mouth? Can you direct me to any posts that either take the pee out of your medical condition or your weight or where you can justify hitting someone?
 

SouthEastern-465

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Joined
24 May 2009
Messages
1,660
Location
Greater London
Seriously, punching in the mouth? Can you direct me to any posts that either take the pee out of your medical condition or your weight or where you can justify hitting someone?

Think most of it was said at the heat of the moment. Personally not to say I agree fully with his posts but I can see where he's coming from to an extent.

Re-reading it 90019 has pretty much put it into prospective.

 

Pumbaa

Established Member
Joined
19 Feb 2008
Messages
5,022
As I made a few comments on the recent thread, I feel I should point out why I did so, and I'd also like to counter a few points you've made IPT.

Firstly this is an internet forum. No-one really knows what you're like off the forum, most know nothing of your physical appearance or any self-perceived shortcomings you may feel you have. I cannot remember anyone on here ever victimising you on your weight or any other related issues. On here we only comment on what we see.

And on here your credibility waivers. You have posted dubious claims before, so it's hardly surprising we greeted your claims this time with several handfuls of salt. Simple equation really- the more credible your postings are, the less disdain with which your posts are treated. And on the whole recently you've not said anything stupid and provided valuable insights to the forum, so you have done well.

Generally our personal issues are kept off the forum, between us I imagine we've got plenty to go on; we don't criticise them either or knock each other for it. I think as a general rule we all get knocked about enough for engaging in activity pertaining to/from this forum anyway as it is.
 

duffman82

Member
Joined
2 Jan 2010
Messages
244
Location
Wolverhampton/Liverpool
You know what?
Man the f*ck up. If you really care what people on the internet think of you, you need to take a step back and look at your priorities.
Don't go on about this dog biting bullsh*t, if you're gonna allow yourself to be provoked, then that's your problem and no one elses.

Says it all for me. Its the internet nuff said..
 

scotsman

Established Member
Joined
6 Jul 2010
Messages
3,252
On a serious note, are you sure your chest problem isn't linked in some way to anxiety. You seem to reference a few things that I don't think I've seen on this forum. It's entirely possible that I've missed them, but you're understandably upset about a handful of posts which your mind is blowing out of proportion.

It's the internet, mate. No one really takes it that seriously, means half the things they say or reads that much into what folk post.

At least, I hope so, or I'm getting smacked...
 
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Blindtraveler

Established Member
Joined
28 Feb 2011
Messages
10,544
if I might add my piece here? Take a look at my username - Blindtraveler - i sometimes cant go to the chippy or the postbox without the local yobbery slagging me and my white stick off! I joined up here half expecting the same but have had none. If like you someone had really made me mad id be cross and im not saying you shouldnt be but do give it some thought mate, if you enjoy this why stop? Im sure your doctors would be happier knowing you had a hobby to relax with.

I am not trying to get at you Ian or draw attention to myself but more saying I know what its like to get sh*t, and also how glad I am that iv fought it.
Im personally saddened not to be meeting you at the WMDR meet as your one of many whos posts are informative and interesting and not in the least bit controvercial.

If nothing else, get well soon bud.
 

Xenophon PCDGS

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Joined
17 Apr 2011
Messages
35,470
Location
A typical commuter-belt part of north-west England
Ian, perhaps a time away from this forum, considering how you feel, will be the best thing for you at the present time. I too have had problems since coming to this forum, but reading your posting has made me consider the fact that life is what you make of it and the holding of unnecessary grudges for whatever reason might have been the start of the problem is meaningless. I have sent a PM to another forum member to express my feelings on this matter.
 

richw

Veteran Member
Joined
10 Jun 2010
Messages
11,528
Location
Liskeard
I have never myself noticed an issue with your posts. One thing I have noticed is a select few members of the forum, think they know it all, and give rude obnoxious answers to whats an interesting question to a novice, but a stupid question to a expert as such. The so-called know it alls then seem to find it acceptable to go "keyboard warrior" on the original poster, trying to make themselves and their knowledge look good. I dont think these individuals actually realise they look like idiots.
This is not all the members with expert knowledge i refer to, perhaps 1-2%, but they ruin it for the majority.
I will look forward to your return,
 

Schnellzug

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22 Aug 2011
Messages
2,926
Location
Evercreech Junction
I've never understood why people need to be rude or blunt on internet forums, it doesn't seem necessary to me, and just seems like people seizing on an opportunity to be rude. If you don't think that someone is telling the truth, so what? Why need to Correct them? Just don't bother saying anything, and move on with a curl of the moustache. That's what i say. But why do people need to be Blunt?
 
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Kernowfem

Member
Joined
24 Oct 2009
Messages
726
Location
The Midlands
if I might add my piece here? Take a look at my username - Blindtraveler - i sometimes cant go to the chippy or the postbox without the local yobbery slagging me and my white stick off! I joined up here half expecting the same but have had none. If like you someone had really made me mad id be cross and im not saying you shouldnt be but do give it some thought mate, if you enjoy this why stop? Im sure your doctors would be happier knowing you had a hobby to relax with.

I am not trying to get at you Ian or draw attention to myself but more saying I know what its like to get sh*t, and also how glad I am that iv fought it.
Im personally saddened not to be meeting you at the WMDR meet as your one of many whos posts are informative and interesting and not in the least bit controvercial.

If nothing else, get well soon bud.


Like blindtraveler, i too have a disability that the forum know about...i lost a leg. I'm lucky though, ive never really encountered any grief over it, only understanding....and no one on this forum has ever made a joke of it.

It worries me somewhat that you seem so angry....I'm also deeply upset that you are living with it. It will eat you up eventually. What happens should you lash out and "punch someone in the mouth"? an assualt charge is not worth it.

You have obviously been through a tough time, and i respect you greatly for your weight loss accomplishments. I only hope you can let go of this anger too, i wish you well Ian, and remember a few words on a computer screen are not the bee all and end all....you have a life away from this forum, with real life people, family and friends....they are the ones who count :)
 

Darandio

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Quite a post there Ian. I am sure, as others have said, nobody was aware of any underlying health problems and nor should they be. All I can say on that matter is that I hope they are sorted in due course.

As for the post itself, it has been broken down and responded to in a manner far better than I could do myself, so I won't repeat anything previously said, however......

An underlying theme of the post was a complaint about attitude from some members, some of it labelled as potentially personal attacks. What I will say is that even as recently as this week, you posted a thread which was possibly uncredible, but also one that was asking for information. Later in the thread, you went off on a rant, claiming "snide" remarks had been made within the thread. All well and good, but in the very first reply to your query, someone gave possible answers, to which you gave the most sarcastic and snide reply possible. A good line here is......

"Speak to others how you would expect to be spoken to yourself"

As I said above though, I hope the underlying health issues are sorted out.
 

Crossover

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9,493
Location
Yorkshire
I have to say, I'm afraid another thread like this may not help matters and in some ways mentioning certain things may be seen as "bragging" even though you say you don't do it.

In all honesty, I do find you come across as a little off-ish on the forum (as others have said, just from the tone and attitude) and you do seem to take things personally and have had your own little rants at people, which sometimes seem to be unfounded on the whole. However, having met you on the last WMDR, I was able to see that IRL, you seem like a decent enough guy and we have had a bit of a laugh and joke since. We all say things in the heat of the moment - hell, I know I've done it before now - that we later regret, but just move on from it.

It's a shame you won't be attending the WMDR meet next week as I was looking forward to meeting you again but I'm sure we'll meet again at some point in the future.

Also, hope your health improves in time and well done on the weight loss to date :)
 

bsillett

Member
Joined
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Messages
27
Having never met anyone from this forum and only being a member for a short time, I know nothing about anyone on here or what they look like but I quess sometimes words can be hurtful to people. Take Kernowfem for example, just looking at her avatar shows me that she is a very good looking young lady. The fact that she has lost a leg does not make me think any differant about her, oh what cause she's lost a leg we should all poke fun of her etc etc. No we shouldn't, same as we shouldn't mock someone for their skin colour, weight issues, hair colour, looks etc etc.
I myself pack a few too many pounds and I have learned to live with it. If I was to punch someone in the face everytime they have made a comment about my weight, I would be in serious trouble with the police. Learn to live with it. If you ignore the idiots who make such comments, they soon get bored and move on to try and annoy someone else.
Ian by all means have a break from the forum, but if I was you I would stay and be a bigger man (no pun intended) about it. I myself left the Auran Trainz forum for a while, not because someone had slagged me off but the fact that there were too many idiots on there ready to jump down peoples throats at the first oppurtunity, people were asking for help and these knobheads would slag them down instead of taking the time to give them the help needed. Luckily that has now change and the forum is a nice place to visit again. I was also a member of the UK Trainz Forum and they had a policy on there not to let kids on there has they were the main problem when it came to slagging people off. Sadly that forum has gone now.
Ian I would like to add that maybe you need to be careful in what you write on forums, if you post something that may sound angry, rude or get peoples backs up then you are inviting responses that will also be angry, rude etc. I always read what I have written before pressing the post button, even if the post I'm replying too angers me.
Well that's my opinion on this matter and I suggest you don't leave or you're just playing into the hands of those making hurtful comments.
P.S. dear mods can we please please stop posts that contain text speak, as an old fart of 46 I find them difficult to read.
 
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DaveNewcastle

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A special-interest internet forum is unlikely to be the best place to make personal statements. I'm not persuaded that even the general social-networking sites are good places to make personal declarations. Not just because posts may be found unexpectedly in the future by someone else, but becuase they're innapropriate to the forum's purposes.

I like this thought:
. . . remember a few words on a computer screen are not the bee all and end all....you have a life away from this forum, with real life people, family and friends....they are the ones who count
Very true words.
 

Chew Chew

Member
Joined
29 Aug 2010
Messages
519
Now all of you wanna now a bit about me, let me tell you about me! I have had success all my life

I may have a small post count on here but I've been on enough fora over the years to know that when you start a 'woe is me' thread typing things like that isn't going to help your case.

If you feel that folk are having a go at you unfairly then alert the mods and let them do their job, don't make a big public display of it.
 
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richw

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.

If you feel that folk are having a go at you unfairly then alert the mods and let them do their job, don't make a big public display of it.

could be seen as attention seeking which could further the problems stated by the OP
 

the sniper

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Joined
4 Sep 2007
Messages
3,498
Personally IPT, I hope you're back soon as you're a good poster. It's a shame that your observational threads turn sour, but I think it's unfair to solely blame others. I only posted on there because you yourself brought up the Pendolino affair, so I thought you were up for a joke about it.

Then you started getting short with people and turned it into a scored match of you versus, presumably, the rest of us. Maybe you didn't mean it this way. I tried to make a joke about it to diffuse the situation, but I assume this was taken the wrong way as you were already wound up by then, having taken it all personally.

Anyway, I wish you the best of health and hope your chest problem are resolved soon. I look forward to your return.
 

Norman

Member
Joined
20 Mar 2011
Messages
43
This all seems a bit dramatic by the OP. Perhaps a bit of perspective needs to be taken. The OP seems to be suffering from health problems (for which I wish you all the best) but to get so upset to write that rambling post worries me that you are not concentrating your energies on getting better. Hopefully this break will do you good.
 

Barn

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Joined
3 Sep 2008
Messages
1,487
Ian, one thing lots of people (particularly men) struggle with is deciding how to judge their own worth. Figuring out how to measure whether they are a decent person or not.

Some men do this by measuring their success on a sports field, others by seeing how high they can climb in a career. But by far the most common method is to see how other people treat you.

In other words, people often see the faces and reactions of others as 'mirrors', and feel good about themselves if others are impressed and bad about themselves if others give a negative reaction.

While this is very natural, it never leads to a good outcome. Nobody gets on with everyone, and if you are using this method to judge yourself, you will not only take it personally when people do not treat you well but will actually think there is something wrong with the very core of yourself as a person.

It is even more dangerous to do this on a forum. People do not see a whole person when they read posts, and they are happy to respond using a tone that they would not use in real speech, precisely because forums are really such an unnatural, inhuman, way of communicating.

My advice is to sit down quietly for a moment and think about what you're good at. One example seems to be videography; I'm sure there are many more. Think about more positive ways in which you can judge yourself. Take up hobbies, take up volunteering. By creating things, and helping others, you will gradually learn that you are a decent person without having to prove it to yourself.

Take care chief,
Jon
 
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43021HST

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I want to make a couple of points here, and I'm going to be blunt.
If you don't like that, in all honesty, I couldn't care less.



Quite.



You know what?
Man the f*ck up. If you really care what people on the internet think of you, you need to take a step back and look at your priorities.
Don't go on about this dog biting bullsh*t, if you're gonna allow yourself to be provoked, then that's your problem and no one elses.



Good for you.
Honestly though, get over it. It's not the most amazing thing in the world that no one else has ever done. Lots of people manage to do that all the time, it's really not that big a big deal.



This post isn't all negative, so hopefully you will.



Always?
I'm aware of one.
Granted, one that's getting somewhat tedious, but really, it's not the end of the world.
Seriously, just ignore it and don't respond. If you let it get to you, that's when the problems start.



This, I agree with.



So, why'd you just tell everyone on here that?
I don't need to know that, and frankly, I don't care.



Good, you've done really well, and I'm sure it's been a massive boost.



I'm sure they'll find out what it is eventually.



It started off so well, and then descended into this.
Prior to this, I'm not aware of people knowing about your weight or medical problems. You've brought them in here, essentially to victimise yourself.



Eight ;)



If it's what you need, it's no bad thing.



Oh, for crying out loud.



:roll:



Good.
Give it time.
What I will say though, if you let people get to you like that, then you're going to cause yourself a lot of problems.



I suppose I should share my opinion.
I don't mind you. I have no real issues with you. If I'm honest, you don't tend to appear on my radar that often, but that's the case for most people on here, so nothing bad.
The only other points I do have to make are that if you need the time away from here, just go do it, it's for your own benefit after all, from what you say, it's been a tough few years, and you've done well, but please, stop the self victimisation, it's rather pathetic.

That is probably one of the best posts I have read from 90019 in a while.
I read the OPs post and what came to mind was 'gimme pity'. I could just as easily launch an attack on every member of the forum who dares attack my good word and list all my personal problems but I dont. I'm glad Ive joined this forum and any other internet forums because it devolops a thick skin.

I think we've all had a sabbatical from RUK, and can bring you to some interesting conclusions about the nature of your postings on RUK.
--- old post above --- --- new post below ---
I myself left the Auran Trainz forum for a while, not because someone had slagged me off but the fact that there were too many idiots on there ready to jump down peoples throats at the first oppurtunity, people were asking for help and these knobheads would slag them down instead of taking the time to give them the help needed. .

Ive never had any problems on the trainz forum in the past, but then again I'm not a key player in the trainz scene on the contarary to what my signature says.
 
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Yew

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Just checking but sabbatical means a break right? Coming from Sunday ,the day of rest, being the sabbath. And possibly from black sabbath if you listen to heavy metal music?
 
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