It just seems a bit short, and a bit perfunctory - writing what you've been told to write, but without any emotion. This is one of those occasions where you need to crawl to get the best outcome, and there isn't enough heartfelt regret. But don't over do it!
I’m trying not to incriminate myself too much, is this better? What else could I add
Dear Sir/Madam,
Thank you for your email referencing travel irregularities.
Please find attached evidence of my valid 16-25 Railcard. As a student, I have purchased a railcard annually since October 2023.
My date of birth is: xxx.
For the journeys you have referenced, the full journey would be from Stratford (London) to Chelmsford. I understand the tickets referenced would not be valid for the full journey.
I sincerely apologise for any oversight on my behalf. In future travel with Greater Anglia, I will ensure the correct tickets are always purchased for my journey.
I would greatly appreciate the opportunity to repay any funds outstanding including any administration fees necessary.
Thank you for your time and consideration and I look forward to hearing from you in the hope this matter can be resolved swiftly.
Kind regards,