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Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

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gg1

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TOCs using historic railway company names.

Really screws up your Google searches if you're at all interested in railway history.
 

ABB125

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Personally, I'll drink either Sprite or 7up, though I haven't had the latter for ages so can't really remember what it's like. Tesco own-brand lemonade is also good.
I'm not, however, a fan of R Whites (or it might be Schweppes, if they do lemonade), though again I've not had it for ages so can't recall why!
 

Bald Rick

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I'm not, however, a fan of R Whites (or it might be Schweppes, if they do lemonade), though again I've not had it for ages so can't recall why!

R Whites is the King of Lemonades. It is the required lemonade for a correct Pimms.

Schweppes lemonade just doesn’t cut it.

7up is lemon and lime-ade, and is entirely different!
 

ABB125

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R Whites is the King of Lemonades. It is the required lemonade for a correct Pimms.

Schweppes lemonade just doesn’t cut it.

7up is lemon and lime-ade, and is entirely different!
Perhaps it's time for a forum lemonade-tasting meet-up... :D

I'd ban cloudy lemonade, it's too sour.
 

py_megapixel

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Sainsbury's. Doing the same thing as Tesco but worse at a slightly higher cost for over 150 years!

(Well, Tesco was actually founded about 50 years after Sainsbury's, but you get my drift)
 

tbtc

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I can understand foods that have flavours like "southern fried" chicken (where it's a description of the flavour that you can expect) or "chunky" kit kat (to show that it's bigger than the regular sized version but I get annoyed with foods that have packaging that says things like "delicious strawberry" or "tantalising tomato" << no, I'll decide if it's "delicious" or "tantalising" (just I'll decide whether the information you provide me is a "fun fact" rather than just a mildly interesting one - people seem to use "fun fact" in the way that chocolate bar manufacturers use "fun sized"... grrr!)
 

py_megapixel

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I can understand foods that have flavours like "southern fried" chicken (where it's a description of the flavour that you can expect) or "chunky" kit kat (to show that it's bigger than the regular sized version but I get annoyed with foods that have packaging that says things like "delicious strawberry" or "tantalising tomato" << no, I'll decide if it's "delicious" or "tantalising" (just I'll decide whether the information you provide me is a "fun fact" rather than just a mildly interesting one - people seem to use "fun fact" in the way that chocolate bar manufacturers use "fun sized"... grrr!)
Fun Fact: As many as 1 in 3 'Fun Facts' are completely made up!
 

Bevan Price

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I can understand foods that have flavours like "southern fried" chicken (where it's a description of the flavour that you can expect) or "chunky" kit kat (to show that it's bigger than the regular sized version but I get annoyed with foods that have packaging that says things like "delicious strawberry" or "tantalising tomato" << no, I'll decide if it's "delicious" or "tantalising" (just I'll decide whether the information you provide me is a "fun fact" rather than just a mildly interesting one - people seem to use "fun fact" in the way that chocolate bar manufacturers use "fun sized"... grrr!)
Such descriptions often mean food ruined by too much unhealthy additives (salt, sugar, etc.) and/or artificial colourants.
 

John Hunt

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Why is BBC 'Breakfast Time' taking so long to return to its normal format? I miss the half-hourly 'local' news/traffic/weather bulletins (currently replaced by a pregnant pause followed by national weather)

On a personal note, Ms Munchetty is not one of my favourite presenters......
 

tbtc

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Adverts that say things like "Toyota proudly sponsors the Paralympics" << yes, you're paying money to sponsor something, you're not going to sponsor something that you are embarrassed to put your name to, surely? (hmm, companies adding unnecessary adjectives seems to be one of my running peeves)

Those Facebook memes where you "award yourself one point for each thing that you've done/ each country visited/ each food you refuse to eat" - ~I think people do them hoping that they'll be a conversation starter but never seem to be

People who talk about "Scotland" as if it's one place, e.g. a news bulletin that says "Boris Johnson will be in Scotland later today" rathe than "Boris Johnson will be in Aberdeen later today", or the thing where you're watching a quiz show and the three contestants are introduced as being from "High Barnet" / "Birmingham" and "Scotland" (because people see a London suburb as being equivalent to a provincial city and all of Scotland in terms of importance - it's the same with "Wales" and "Northern Ireland" but I notice it more as a Scot)

FC St Pauli. I've nothing particularly against the German football team, but I do get annoyed with the way that they've become a "second team" for glory hunting fans of large clubs in the UK who want the credibility of also being seen to support an "underdog". I've known a few people like this who'd never be seen at their local Conference North (or other lower league) side, and have very little knowledge of anything outside the English/ Scottish Premier Leagues other than when a famous player like Frank Lampard/ Wayne Rooney is managing one of the clubs, but you can deny accusations that you were a glory hunter when you started supporting Glasgow Celtic/ Manchester United etc by ensuring that you use an FC St Pauli mug in the office, to give people the impression that you are a credible football fan who cares about the "wee guy".

I guess my dislike of FC St Pauli supporters is a bit like the way that Hipsters were (initially) wacky and zany for choosing a brand that nobody had ever heard of (e.g. Brewdog), but then that brand grew and grew and was no longer very "alternative"

Fun Fact: As many as 1 in 3 'Fun Facts' are completely made up!

Haha!

I'd just like a dull fact or a morose fact - there's too much emphasis on wacky zany fun these days

Why is BBC 'Breakfast Time' taking so long to return to its normal format? I miss the half-hourly 'local' news/traffic/weather bulletins (currently replaced by a pregnant pause followed by national weather)

Is that because you're watching it on HD? (I have to switch from channel 101 over to "regular" BBC1 to get the local news)
 

adrock1976

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What's it called? It's called Cumbernauld
SNIP

People who talk about "Scotland" as if it's one place, e.g. a news bulletin that says "Boris Johnson will be in Scotland later today" rathe than "Boris Johnson will be in Aberdeen later today", or the thing where you're watching a quiz show and the three contestants are introduced as being from "High Barnet" / "Birmingham" and "Scotland" (because people see a London suburb as being equivalent to a provincial city and all of Scotland in terms of importance - it's the same with "Wales" and "Northern Ireland" but I notice it more as a Scot)

FC St Pauli. I've nothing particularly against the German football team, but I do get annoyed with the way that they've become a "second team" for glory hunting fans of large clubs in the UK who want the credibility of also being seen to support an "underdog". I've known a few people like this who'd never be seen at their local Conference North (or other lower league) side, and have very little knowledge of anything outside the English/ Scottish Premier Leagues other than when a famous player like Frank Lampard/ Wayne Rooney is managing one of the clubs, but you can deny accusations that you were a glory hunter when you started supporting Glasgow Celtic/ Manchester United etc by ensuring that you use an FC St Pauli mug in the office, to give people the impression that you are a credible football fan who cares about the "wee guy".

I guess my dislike of FC St Pauli supporters is a bit like the way that Hipsters were (initially) wacky and zany for choosing a brand that nobody had ever heard of (e.g. Brewdog), but then that brand grew and grew and was no longer very "alternative"

SNIP

Regarding "Scotland", it is a similar thing with "The Midlands" too, particularly with some TV presenters.

As far as they are aware, "The Midlands" is somewhere north of the M25, and south of the Mersey, Manchester, and Sheffield. They never mention compass point parts, or even a town or city at all.

Regarding football sides, I am a supporter of two teams that are not perceived as being fashionable or hipster at all, being Aston Villa (as I am originally from the West Midlands), and Partick Thistle as my adopted Scottish team when I relocated to Scotland in 1998. In other words, it could be interpreted that being as those are my two teams, that it is my way of indulging in some masochism.
 

py_megapixel

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Dubbed TV programmes which have different subtitles if you view them as well.
I was just about to post that. I was trying to watch the Simpsons in German the other day and was infuriated to discover that the subtitles and the dubbing appear to have been done from two different translations.
 

Calthrop

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Funniest thing I ever saw was years ago in a Paris hotel - late night TV.
Dambusters, dubbed in German with French sub-titles.

Irresistible to ask: what name was given, respectively, to the famous -- now notorious -- dog?
 

Gloster

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Slightly off on a tangent to that. I once read a German translation of Nevil Shute’s novel Pastoral, which is set on a World War II bomber base, but includes raids over Germany. The German translation was fairly accurate, except that all the German target cities were substituted by French and Belgian ones.
 

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