northern156
Member
No, it is my seat. Would you give your, say, McDonalds (which you bought out of your own pocket) to a pigeon with a sore leg?
Not the best metaphor, oh well, I'm tired
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Would you stand?
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Not the best metaphor, oh well, I'm tired
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Gemz91
Member
So if your Grandma got on the train, she couldn't reserve a seat because it was a last minute journey, you'd be happy to find out she'd stood all the way, when there was a group of young lads sat down taking up seats?
northern156
Member
I wouldn't be happy, no-one would - but you should expect not to be able to be seated - you have no legal right!
Don't forget that people that don't offer there seat might have a perfectly valid reason as to why they are in more of a need than say the elderly but otherwise fit and healthy man that's just got on. I was travelling home fromManchester today on a fairly crowded train when an elderly man got on and proceeded to glare at me. Refusing to be intimidated, I buried my head in my book
I heard him say to a person stood next to him "no respect bla bla bla"
When I stood up to get off and he saw my huge baby bump (that my bag was covering) he didn't know where to put his face!
Having said that, if I'm feeling ok, I'll offer my seat. I'm only pregnant and I'm having a healthy easy pregnancy but today, I was exhausted
I heard him say to a person stood next to him "no respect bla bla bla"
When I stood up to get off and he saw my huge baby bump (that my bag was covering) he didn't know where to put his face!
Having said that, if I'm feeling ok, I'll offer my seat. I'm only pregnant and I'm having a healthy easy pregnancy but today, I was exhausted
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Yes. If the train is busy I'll happily give up my seat to someone who needs it more, regardless of whether it's a priority seat, normal seat or my reserved seat. I don't think I've ever been asked to give up my seat, I can imagine it is quite hard to ask someone to give up their seat so I do offer to others.
I sort of second this - if for instance somebody got on at the station before the one at which I was getting off, I'd offer them my seat without the blink of an eye. If I had sat in a priority seat I would do as well. And although I would in other circumstances, it would be with a lesser degree of willingness - not directed towards the person needing it, but to the other people in the carriage, many of whom would be fitter and/or younger and/or travelling a shorter distance than me.
trainophile
Established Member
Surely anyone who desperately needs a seat would be more likely to ask in a general way whether anyone would be kind enough, rather than pick on one specific person. How would they know who to pick?
Overground undergound doesn't matter to me, if someone is nearby who is less able than me then I always offer out of common courtesy, whether they are deaf dumb or blind or just plain incompetent of what I can do in life it doesn't matter, they get asked loud and politely
Its funny how many people turn there heads when you offer out loud?
Not bothered if I paid for a seat or not, I only pay to travel to get me to from a to b, not to sit. Offered my seat when travelling with my partner to someone once (elderly) from london waterloo all the way to salisbury, they didn't really say thanks but I didn't care, one hour standing up talking to the fiancee was not on the agenda but I did my bit for the lost art of common courtesy
Did anyone else?
Its funny how many people turn there heads when you offer out loud?
Not bothered if I paid for a seat or not, I only pay to travel to get me to from a to b, not to sit. Offered my seat when travelling with my partner to someone once (elderly) from london waterloo all the way to salisbury, they didn't really say thanks but I didn't care, one hour standing up talking to the fiancee was not on the agenda but I did my bit for the lost art of common courtesy
Did anyone else?
dannypye9999
Member
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- 392
I would stand for old frail people, but not pregnant people. They act like pregnancy is an illness and that theyre the only person ever to be pregnant.
VauxhallandI
Established Member
pjnathanail
Member
If I am in a priority seat/wheelchair area I will move if required, asked or otherwise. In a "normal" seat I will first see if any other seats are available, then if not I will offer my seat to elderly people. I will gladly give it to anybody with a valid reason who asks, but I do not routinely offer it to pregnant ladies as I do not wish to offend, should they not be pregnant/not wish to sit down.
Johnnie2Sheds
Member
Years ago as a young fella I would have done, but not now.
My balance isn't too good.
Woman on bus: "If you were a gentleman you'd give up your seat for me."
Me: "If you were a lady you wouldnt have to ask."
(Copyright Groucho Marx)
My balance isn't too good.
Woman on bus: "If you were a gentleman you'd give up your seat for me."
Me: "If you were a lady you wouldnt have to ask."
(Copyright Groucho Marx)
Searle
Established Member
Seriously? They're probably going through hell while in late pregnancy and all you can think about is whether it's their fault or not?
If you were pregnant and in that state of pain then I think you would think differently (no I am not talking through first hand experience :roll: )
I agree with this, take pretty much the same stance myself.
Back in the summer I had a young lady stand up and offer me her seat (first time this has ever happened to me). Made me realise just how old I am...
Tetchytyke
Veteran Member
They should have reserved a seat if they were that old or infirm.
I've chucked people out of my reserved seat before, even where they were probably less able to stand than me. Not my problem, the reservation ticket is clear enough, they chose to sit in a reserved seat. I would do the same thing again.
Rude? No, it isn't. I reserve seats to avoid having to stand. They should do the same.
If the train is unreserved then I would offer my seat, because then it is a free-for-all.
Gemz91 said:
That wouldn't bother me in the slightest. Reservations are available until 6pm the day before travel; on XC they're available 15 mninutes before travel (in theory). Should have reserved a seat or waited for a quieter train if standing is so difficult.
dannypye999 said:
Pregnancy can often be an illness. My ex had SPD when she was pregnant; this means the ligaments holding her pelvis and hips together weakened and stretched. She couldn't stand and could barely walk down stairs.
GatwickDepress
Established Member
The bystander effect comes into play when asking a group of strangers. If one person is specifically asked something, they feel obliged to respond, as opposed to asking a group where nobody feels inclined to answer since somebody else is sure to.
It's why in first aid courses you're told to ask a particular individual to do something rather than ask generally.
Agree wholeheartedly with this. "It's their own fault" is a very slippery slope where pregnancy is concerned. Sometimes a baby is conceived not out of choice...
Alternately... the chap in crutches with his leg encased in plaster hobbling down the packed carriage could have broken it (the leg, not the carriage) while skiing, in which case, it's his own fault. He chose to go skiing. Why should I sacrifice my comfort for him?
my bold
...and you know that how exactly? I fear you are guilty of the same thing you accuse others of there! I do, however, actually agree with the thrust of your arguement.
I am an apparently fit(ish!) and healthy middle aged man and had the same rubbish last year - the fact I underwent spinal surgery in May and had been advised not to stand for long periods was of course not visible to those judging me (unless they could see the 5cm hole in the back of my lower neck/upper back)......
Indeed. There is no way of knowing whether someone on crutches can be considered to have been the cause of their own misfortune, and why should it matter anyway?
Often we can't see or know what health problems an individual is suffering from, so whether something can be judged to be self inflicted is irrelevant anyway.
All we can do is to decide for ourselves whether we are in a position to give up our seat for someone who may need it more. I am more than happy to do that for a pregnant women, as I am for someone with obvious mobility issues, particularly if I have a seat near the door which would be easier for soemone to reach than having to struggle down the carriage tp a spare seat in the middle!
I make no judgement on others who don't move, as I don't know their individual circumstances. I do what I feel is right in the circumstances. I would assume that in most cases, those who are able to reserve seats will gladly do so, and I don't feel that being unable to book aseat should require someone who clearly has difficulty in standing to do so if I am able to do so instead.
Others can make their own choices!
It depends.
On a short or local journey I would probably give up my seat in most circumstances.
Not so certain though on a 2 hour+ journey when I have paid a high fare and booked a seat.
Some trains are so busy that there will allways be people standing whose need is greater, does that mean that I should allways stand from Paddington to Taunton ?
On a short or local journey I would probably give up my seat in most circumstances.
Not so certain though on a 2 hour+ journey when I have paid a high fare and booked a seat.
Some trains are so busy that there will allways be people standing whose need is greater, does that mean that I should allways stand from Paddington to Taunton ?
That would be up to you, only you can decide based upon what you can see, not the whole train!
My conscience would not allow me to sit down if there was someone on crutches (although some do find it more comfortable to stand), a frail looking person, or a frail older looking person standing up nearby.
I would not offer my seat based solely on gender or age.
EssexGonzo
Member
- Joined
- 9 May 2012
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- 637
I would stand for somone whose need appears to be greater than mine. Subjective, but then us humans are.
I do find the one or two comments (a minority admittedly) about not standing for pregnant women astonishing.
Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk
I do find the one or two comments (a minority admittedly) about not standing for pregnant women astonishing.
Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk
I'll always stand for someone who looks elderly or has an obvious disability or injury. Also if someone asked me if I minded giving them my seat I wouldn't mind. I would hope it was for a good reason but I wouldn't grill them. I'll also stand for ladies (And have not had any funny looks yet suggesting I am patronising, I hold doors for ladies to, wild).
One massive exception to this rule is long distance buses in South America that pick up people at the side of the road. If them and the driver are going to put my life at risk they can sit on the floor, no exceptions for age or disability.
One massive exception to this rule is long distance buses in South America that pick up people at the side of the road. If them and the driver are going to put my life at risk they can sit on the floor, no exceptions for age or disability.
I hold doors for ladies...and men. No discrimination here!
Oh yes there is!!! Either "women.....and men" or "ladies.....and gentlemen" surely!!!
Do you just let the door slam behind you if it's a male following you? I tend to hold the door open unless the person behind me is a long way behind.
Ha ha, no of course not. I'll hold the door open for anyone. I just didn't want to write an essay about my acts of gallantry. If anyone is interested I will go in to more detail.
I once tipped a bus driver at Christmas, he looked at me like I was mental. Never again.
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Oh yes there is!!! Either "women.....and men" or "ladies.....and gentlemen" surely!!!
It's a fair cop...
Quite...of course, in the old days a gentleman would rush ahead of the lady to open the door for her!
And then let the door shut in the face of the man behind!
But all of this is getting a bit off topic...
I hold doors for ladies...and men. No discrimination here!
Do that for anyone in total :P
Although i get many deathglares from some though and if done for me always say thank you.
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