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Thanks buddy ?

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Closet2405

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I was on a VTEC service from Edinburgh this afternoon, sat next to an Australian family in first class. I was quite surprised to hear the first class hosts (and possibly the guard too, not certain on that though) address the fairly young (no older than 13) children as sir.
 
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6Gman

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As long as on-train staff don't start asking the "got any nice plans for the rest of the day?" nonsense that I get asked increasingly often in banks and the like ...

:D

I'm sometimes tempted to say "well now I've drawn out the cash I'm off to pay the undertaker the deposit on my nan's funeral" or similar ...
 

DerekC

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I have been called "sir, "luv", "mate", "pet", "buddy", "chap" and probably some others that I can't remember by train crew of various shapes, sizes and genders in different parts of the country. Can't say I mind any of them too much, although not keen on Americanisation in general. The ones you remember are accompanied by a smile.
 

Pinza-C55

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....Including the ones who get so worked up that they want the thread closed, or who accuse the OP of over-sensitivity when he'd made his point in a straightforward way and also made clear that it wasn't a complaint.

I'm one of the older generation. I prefer not to be called buddy or mate. But it happens, and I don't comment. If I was checking the tickets I'd just say "Thank you".

When someone says "Have a nice day" and the time is already 5.30 pm it does come across as purely automatic and unlikely to be sincere.

Exactly. I am 57 and grew up during the punk era so I still have a lot of that attitude in me. But I used to approach my job in a professional manner and tried not to use over familiar terms when I spoke to fare paying passengers. There are some fairly irate replies here but I suppose that too is a sign of the times we live in.
I wasn't offended , I just found it curious and worthy of discussion.
--- old post above --- --- new post below ---
As long as on-train staff don't start asking the "got any nice plans for the rest of the day?" nonsense that I get asked increasingly often in banks and the like ...

:D

I'm sometimes tempted to say "well now I've drawn out the cash I'm off to pay the undertaker the deposit on my nan's funeral" or similar ...

Someone on another forum said that when asked by a barber "how would you like your hair cut today sir?" he replied "in total silence".
 

SPADTrap

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PA firmly staying in its cradle from now on and all contact with everyone being avoided :lol:

Maybe we should use 'Thank you, Human' in order to be neutral but factual! :P This is painful.
 
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dave87016

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When I get my ticket checked I always say cheers mate or cheers pal if its a guy or cheers love if its a female who checks my ticketl I am a happy and polite person same in first class if a member of the male staff serves I say yes please pal thanks pal if it's female I say yes please and thanks love same if I ask a member of staff for information or I get off a bus.

Manners cost nothing and politeness goes a long way.
 
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keith1879

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I don't see why customers/passengers need to be given any label in normal transactions, as please and thank you (or thanks/ta for a more casual flavour), is perfectly adequate and can't be wrong in the way that some prefer it to be.

Spot on.
 

Harbornite

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This thread is a storm in a teacup, and I'm not necessarily referring to the original post...
 

Master29

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If he`s pleasant about it I wouldn`t worry what he said ;within reason of course as hello twxtface show us your ticket might be construed as a little offensive.
 

bb21

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This thread is a storm in a teacup, and I'm not necessarily referring to the original post...

You are thinking just like me these days. Dangerous traits indeed. :lol:

"Cheers buddy/love" is what I normally say to guards who do me a favour. I don't think any have yet taken offence, or least that is what I think.
 

DarloRich

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I know the days of British Rail are long gone with all they entailed and we are now in the wonderful world of privatisation. Times have changed.
I rarely travel on trains nowadays but I am on a Virgin East Coast service and have just had my ticket checked by what I assume was the conductor. He finished the proceedings by saying "Thanks buddy". I am not saying I was a paragon of virtue but when I was working trains, certainly ECML trains, I would never address a passenger in this way.
What are your views on this ?

My views are i don't care what I am referred to! It isn't 1953 anymore - a total overreaction to a minor informality
 
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Pinza-C55

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You are thinking just like me these days. Dangerous traits indeed. :lol:

"Cheers buddy/love" is what I normally say to guards who do me a favour. I don't think any have yet taken offence, or least that is what I think.

And you are a passenger*, not a professional member of railway staff employed to do a job. That's the difference.
* Customer, if you prefer.
 

J-2739

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And you are a passenger*, not a professional member of railway staff employed to do a job. That's the difference.
* Customer, if you prefer.

Your acting like people of a sort of profession are a different species; at the end of the day, no matter of class, we are all human beings.
 

SPADTrap

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Your acting like people of a sort of profession are a different species; at the end of the day, no matter of class, we are all human beings.

I think one needs to get over ones self, so to speak :lol:
 

Harbornite

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You are thinking just like me these days. Dangerous traits indeed. :lol:

"Cheers buddy/love" is what I normally say to guards who do me a favour. I don't think any have yet taken offence, or least that is what I think.

You better be careful, don't let me become a mod!

On a serious note, the only slightly inappropriate use of language I can think of (other than swearing at customers, w*nker, c*nt, t*sspot etc) would be a male guard referring to a female passenger as babe, shawty or darling. Obviously I've never heard of any guards using these words and they wouldn't really warrant an investigation. Buddy isn't particularly inappropriate.
 

yorkie

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And you are a passenger*, not a professional member of railway staff employed to do a job. That's the difference.
* Customer, if you prefer.
I think you may find he is all of those things :lol:

And part of their job may be considered to be to have a good rapport with passengers, which I think most people would agree is what the Guard in your case was attempting to do, and would be successful most of the time ;)
 

bb21

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And you are a passenger*, not a professional member of railway staff employed to do a job. That's the difference.
* Customer, if you prefer.

I don't think there is necessarily a right and wrong answer for something like this. What role I was in doesn't really change the fact that some people may take offence.

I think LowLevel just about sums it up. You can often tell in a few seconds what the most appropriate term is likely to be with a customer. We are told to be professional, and at the same time empathise with customers by showing a personal touch. The balance is sometimes difficult to strike.

I have addressed customers in various forms when on platform duty (during major disruptions mostly, when tensions run high and wearing a suit often makes one a focal point for complaints), and have yet to be spat at or sworn at (not addressed at me personally at least). A good smile goes a long way, and occasionally a shrug when used appropriately, but I think the actual term of address is very low down on many people's priority list.

At the end of the day, occasionally staff will get it wrong, and sometimes it is simply a matter of not being able to please everyone. It's all simply part of life, and most people are so busy that they cannot be bothered to dwell on such a minor issue.
 

richw

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If you called my wife ma'am and she complained that it was derogatory what would you call her ?

Rather than 'excuse me madam', just 'excuse me'
On using google typing in madam it changes to Madame and comes up as top result a definition to be a brothel manager....
I think that's the issue
 

Johnuk123

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Rather than 'excuse me madam', just 'excuse me'
On using google typing in madam it changes to Madame and comes up as top result a definition to be a brothel manager....
I think that's the issue

What's google got to do with it ?

There is no issue unless you're looking for one.

What if she thought "excuse me" was derogatory ?
The point I'm trying to make is you reckon people get offended by a certain way of talking but where does it end.
 
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yorkie

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I agree Google has nothing to do with this.

Also Google doesn't change a search for madam into a search for madame, not does it give the definition mentioned above as the top result!
 

richw

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What's google got to do with it ?

There is no issue unless you're looking for one.

What if she thought "excuse me" was derogatory ?
The point I'm trying to make is you reckon people get offended by a certain way of talking but where does it end.

Google has nothing to do with it, however when a madam is a brothel manager, this is why women are getting offended and complaining. They feel they are Being called brothel managers, Maybe it's a modern day mindset, but women are complaining to retail companies for being called madam is a real life issue.

FYI it appears it was autocorrect changing to Madame as it keeps doing it for me here as I type as well rather than google.
 

Busaholic

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I've just thought of a word which would rile me if used to address me and that would be 'sunshine'. I can't think how such a word could be deployed in a non-derogatory way.
 

bb21

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I've just thought of a word which would rile me if used to address me and that would be 'sunshine'. I can't think how such a word could be deployed in a non-derogatory way.

Probably because you were beaming with positivity. Think positive. ;)
 

yorkie

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Google has nothing to do with it, however when a madam is a brothel manager, this is why women are getting offended and complaining. They feel they are Being called brothel managers, Maybe it's a modern day mindset, but women are complaining to retail companies for being called madam is a real life issue.

FYI it appears it was autocorrect changing to Madame as it keeps doing it for me here as I type as well rather than google.
Yes, must be your device! I had never heard of the term "madam" being used to mean a brothel manager until it was mentioned on this thread.
 

Busaholic

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Probably because you were beaming with positivity. Think positive. ;)

I didn't say I'd actually been called that by anyone:) I'd probably reply by addressing them as moonbeam, in theory anyway.
 

me123

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I know the days of British Rail are long gone with all they entailed and we are now in the wonderful world of privatisation. Times have changed.
I rarely travel on trains nowadays but I am on a Virgin East Coast service and have just had my ticket checked by what I assume was the conductor. He finished the proceedings by saying "Thanks buddy". I am not saying I was a paragon of virtue but when I was working trains, certainly ECML trains, I would never address a passenger in this way.
What are your views on this ?

I really don't see what the problem is. Not a term I'd use, but he's thanking the customer which goes above what some people term customer service nowadays. "Buddy" may be a colloquial term, but it's not offensive or derogatory to anyone (who is sane). I'm quite surprised that you have taken the time in your life to complain about such a non-event on the internet.
 

bb21

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It's sort of got a French link, and sort of (a small minority of) people actively looking to be offended.

If the word "madam" were so offensive, we would have banned it in formal writing a long time ago.
--- old post above --- --- new post below ---
I really don't see what the problem is. Not a term I'd use, but he's thanking the customer which goes above what some people term customer service nowadays. "Buddy" may be a colloquial term, but it's not offensive or derogatory to anyone (who is sane). I'm quite surprised that you have taken the time in your life to complain about such a non-event on the internet.

To be fair he did say he wasn't complaining, just raising it as a point for discussion.
 

richw

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Yes, must be your device! I had never heard of the term "madam" being used to mean a brothel manager until it was mentioned on this thread.

Out of curiosity up I checked my dictionary, this is the 3rd definition given....

"Madam" often refers to a woman, usually older, who manages a brothel, escort service or some other form of prostitution for profit, that is, a procuress.


I should add I was oblivious until complaints were received at my work!
I've been sending job applications this week, and all the cover letters were addressed sir/madam!
 
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