Another item remembered, from the daft "clerihews on places" in the book of mid-20th-century "funnies" which we used to have at home. One -- mildly saucy -- runs:
The girls of Peckham
Don't readily let men neck 'em:
For they're in no way to blame
For its name.
The other goes as follows:
Manchester
Conferred the Freedom of the City on Elsa Lanchester
As a riposte to Houghton,
Which did the same for Charles Laughton.
This is one of several of these ?gems, which appear to be totally nonsensical, and not intended to be otherwise. What Lanchester and Laughton -- prominent actors of that period, married to each other -- actually have to to with anything here, is entirely unclear. Neither does the clerihew make it clear, which of England's dozen-plus settlements called sometimes just Houghton, sometimes Houghton with a suffix; is referred to. I choose to guess the biggest: Houghton-le-Spring, Tyne and Wear.