Govia thameslink intention to prosecute letter - HELP

[superkopite]

I was travelling and used my siblings zip oyster, it was in my card holder and I was in a rush and used it, and I was caught.

I was running late and was in a rush so I don’t miss my train, so I used the closest 0yster card in reach from my wallet, which on that occasion was my siblings z1p card, instead of mines.

Neither of these accounts gives the impression of a mistake. They both sound like the OP intentionally used the Zip card as a time-saving mechanism.

If the OP genuinely used the ZIP card by mistake I would suggest being MUCH clearer in their wording.

 

[AlterEgo]

Is it worth OP noting that Student Oyster cards look a lot more similar to Zip Oyster cards than ordinary (i.e. no photo) ones do, or will this look like excuse-making?

They don't though, a ZIP Oyster is bright green and has the child's photo on it. I have to say if I had my own Oyster in my wallet and a bright green ZIP one I think it would be very difficult to confuse the two even at a glance.

 

[SKI]

okay so what should I please say in my letter. Because if even people on this thread are doubting the account in my letter then I worry what the actual company will think
It’s genuinely what happened and I do regret being careless :/

 

[zwk500]

okay so what should I please say in my letter. Because if even people on this thread are doubting the account in my letter then I worry what the actual company will think
It’s genuinely what happened and I do regret being careless :/

The company will be interested in what happened but they are far more concerned about whether or not you are likely to make this mistake again.

I personally would look at the following areas:

I was running late and was in a rush so I don’t miss my train, so I used the closest 0yster card in reach from my wallet, which on that occasion was my siblings z1p card, instead of mines.

Replace the crossed out section with 'in my rush I mistakenly picked up my sibling Zip card instead of mine.' (and beware of the typos that this section has)

I admit this was careless, silly and wrong of me to do, and I now deeply regret it. as I now realise it is a form of fare evasion which is really serious, and it wasn’t what I was intending to do

Keep this part short, they've heard the sob stories before

I deeply apologise and I am certain nothing like this will occur again.

This is the part where you need to go into greater detail to reassure the train company that you are sincere on this point. 'I deeply apologies and I will be taking action to ensure I do not make this mistake again'. You may choose to mention a specific action, if you think it will help this point. You may also choose to expand on your apology, acknowledging the cost to the Company of both the initial action of paying the wrong fare (which they mention in their letter) and the costs involved in following up this incident.

I am really keen to settle this matter without the need for court action please.

I would personally get rid of 'really' - it's quite informal, and not add the please on the end, just stylistically it flows better.

I offer to sincerely pay the outstanding fare, and the train company’s administrative and legal costs and time in dealing with this situation to settle the matter without incurring additional costs or using your valuable time.

A more concise wording would be: 'I would be willing to pay any outstanding fares and to compensate GTR for the costs incurred in investigating this matter.'

It is better if the letter is written fully by yourself, so that any further correspondence has definitely come from the same person. So please feel free to play with my wordings to better reflect how you want to write to GTR

 

[SKI]

Thank you very much this is very helpful.
I will get the letter sent out soon and will update on this thread the next outcome hopefully it goes well

 

[zwk500]

Thank you very much this is very helpful.
I will get the letter sent out soon and will update on this thread the next outcome hopefully it goes well

Feel free to post a revised draft up.

 

[6Gman]

Thanks for your comments everyone
So to clarify I had the siblings Oyster card because we went out few weeks prior to incident and I was just holding on to it for him (as u do I guess for a younger sibling who’s prone to losing things) so was in my card holder, same as my other Oyster card and I used the siblings Oyster card in a rush

what else should I clarify further/ add in my letter?

I think you should certainly explain why your sibling's card was in your wallet. Like others who have commented I thought this part sounded a bit odd.

So something like "my younger sibling's card was in my wallet as we had been travelling together and he/she asked me to carry it for him/her".

 

[SKI]

hi guys. Would appreciate some quick feedback as I plan on posting tomorrow
Here is my revised draft

Dear Sir/Madam,
Thank you for allowing me to have the opportunity to respond to your letter.
On the xx/xx/22_, I was running late for my train, and, in a rush, I mistakenly picked up my siblings Zip card instead of my oyster card and used it for the journey. I was carrying his zip card in my cardholder, as it was still there from an outing a few weeks ago. He wanted
me to hold on to it for him, as he's prone to losing things easily, and I forgot to give it back to him when we went home. I take full accountability for my mistake, and I admit I should have not used his Zip card carelessly. I admit this was careless and wrong for me to do, and I
deeply regret it.

I deeply apologise and I am certain nothing like this will occur again. I will be taking action to ensure that I do not make a mistake like this again. For instance, I will not be carrying anyone else's oyster card but mine, but and will also make sure my sibling's oyster card is
kept in a separate wallet, clearly differentiated from mine, to prevent me ever picking up his in error, or if I ever must hold on to it, it's not used by me in error.

As a recent graduate, I understand this can have a serious negative impact on my ability to
get a job, and I would kindly ask if it were possible this could be settled without the need for court action. I have learnt from my mistake, and I am keen to settle this matter. I am willing to sincerely pay any outstanding fares owed and to compensate GTR for the time and costs incurred in investigating this matter.
Again, I am deeply sorry for my mistake.

I hope you can look favourably on this request, and I look forward to your response.

 

[6Gman]

hi guys. Would appreciate some quick feedback as I plan on posting tomorrow
Here is my revised draft

Dear Sir/Madam,
Thank you for allowing me to have the opportunity to respond to your letter.
On the xx/xx/22_, I was running late for my train, and, in a rush, I mistakenly picked up my siblings Zip card instead of my oyster card and used it for the journey. I was carrying his zip card in my cardholder, as it was still there from a recent outing a few weeks ago. He wanted
me to hold on to it for him, as he's prone to losing things easily, and I forgot to give it back to him when we went home. I take full accountability for my carelessness. mistake, and I admit I should have not used his Zip card carelessly. I admit this was careless and wrong for me to do, and I
deeply regret it.

I deeply apologise and I am certain nothing like this will occur again. I will be taking action to ensure that I do not make a mistake like this again. For instance, I will not be carrying anyone else's oyster card but mine, but and will also make sure my Should I carry my sibling's oyster card is
kept in a separate wallet, clearly differentiated from mine, to prevent me ever picking up his in error, or if I ever must hold on to it, in future I will ensure it's not used by me in error.

As a recent graduate, I understand this can have a serious negative impact on my ability to
get a job, and I would kindly ask if it were possible this could be settled without the need for court action. I have learnt from my mistake, and I am keen to settle this matter. I am willing to sincerely by paying any outstanding fares owed and to compensate GTR for the time and costs incurred in investigating this matter.
Again, I am deeply sorry for my mistake.

I hope you can look favourably on this request, and I look forward to your response.

I think the basics are OK but too wordy. So I would suggest the changes above.

 

[Hadders]

I agree with the alterations that @6Gman has suggested.

 

[SKI]

thanks all. It has been posted
I will be in touch again when I receive a reply

 

[SKI]

hi guys update. I got the letter today and they agreed to settle it out of court for £57, which I’m very pleased about!! Thank you all so much for your help!!!

 

[Fawkes Cat]

Thanks for letting us know. This is a good result - it's not a criminal conviction so you don't need to tell anyone about it, and the DBS won't know either.

It's also useful for us as it gives us some idea how much the railway company are willing to settle for these days.

 

[zwk500]

hi guys update. I got the letter today and they agreed to settle it out of court for £57, which I’m very pleased about!! Thank you all so much for your help!!!

Excellent news. Thanks for letting us know