Funny announcement at a station.

[philjo]

I have seen WAGN displayed on the internal screens in the 365s a couple of times recently.
I think both were after the train had to be rebooted after a power blip or coupling so it may be some form of default setting when the power is restored. It also says BRB class 465 on the screens whilst starting up.

One of the FCC drivers regularly announces his train as the xx.xx Great Northern service to Kings cross with no reference to FCC at all!

About 10 years ago I remember the West Indian man who used to work at Welwyn Garden City once apologised to passengers on platform 2 for the delay to the morning peak services towards London & hoped it wouldn't disrupt their Christmas parties (it was during the week before Christmas)

At WGC a couple of years ago there was an announcement asking the kids hanging round on platform 2 to do so in the shopping Centre or go home & play with the presents they were given last Christmas.

 

[mr williams]

He meant to say "in reverse formation" but I once heard the announcer at Newport inform passengers awaiting the impending HST to Paddington "please note that this train is running backwards".

But my all time favourite was at Birmingham New Street some 30 years ago when this lugubrious, Brummie voice came on with:

"we apologise to passengers on platform x for the late departure of the 17.32 to Wallsall.................................this is a staff announcement, will the driver of the 17.32 to Walsall please go to platform x as your train is waiting for you!"

 

[Wyvern]

If we are including not very funny announcements, my train pulled into Northampton and sat there . . . .and sat there.

Finally an announcement over the Pa "We are sorry for the delay to your journey. The crew is travelling here by a taxi which has got lost"

Apparently it's not uncommon.

 

[dcd]

Funny heard on delayed train from London to Winchester one winter's evening.

PA announces that train is held because police called to the train in front due to someone being assaulted.

Passenger who was obviously asleep through most of the announcement or who was slightly deaf - on mobile phone to home. Sorry I'll be home late as the train is delayed due to the wrong kind of salt.

 

[danfitz123]

Has anybody heard the announcements at runcorn east..."A-RRRRR-iVa -TREns WaYuls"

 

[tinselworm]

Was catching a very late train out of temple meads last sunday (2310 to worle) and as you'd expect all the stations were pretty much filled with trains just sat waiting to get taken to the depot. The automated PA did not like this at all, and kept telling us to stand back from platform x as the train was not stopping at this station when there was a train just sat there. And without fail, the 2310 every sunday has a platform alteration from platform 8 to platform 8, always makes me chuckle.

 

[Roylang]

Many years ago I was at Reading when a standard train departure announcement was made which could be heard on Platforms 5-8. At the end however, the mic was not turned off and the announcement continued for a short while with lots of swearing and moaning. You clearly heard a door bang open and somebody mutter "brown stuff" (you can guess) and the mic clicked off.

About a minute later an announcement was made stating: "We would like to apologise for the earlier announcements"

Roy

 

[Strat-tastic]

Way back when I was a student returning to Uni on the Brum - Nottingham train, the guard helpfully announced, "The train will shortly be arriving at... er Derby; the next station is... Derby.... er.... I think."

 

[Bittern]

"ScotRail apologize for the inconvenience caused."

Sorry, but should it not be "ScotRail apologizes for the inconvenience caused."?

 

[Smethwickian]

"ScotRail apologize for the inconvenience caused."

Sorry, but should it not be "ScotRail apologizes for the inconvenience caused."?

Yes. Scotrail is a singular entity. Has anyone else noticed that this is a grammatical error which BBC reporters and newsreaders make almost without exception when it comes to referring to corporate bodies; stating, for example,that "the Government have decided...."?

Infuriating.

 

[Bittern]

On the Maryhil lline, ScotRail 158s tend to forget that there is a station named Kelvindale and say "We are now approaching please mind the gap when alighting from this train." and "This is this train is for Anniesland. The next stop is Anniesland."

Although, sometimes they do remember. "We are now approaching KELVINDALE. Please mind the gap when alighting from this train."" and "This is KELVINDALE this train is for Anniesland. The next stop is Anniesland.

 

[317666]

The 377 I was on presumably didn't have Southampton Airport Parkway programmed into the announcements. "The next station is-".

 

[MCR247]

Probably because they don't normally call there?

 

[northernrail]

Yesterday at Doncaster the man announced "the service to Newcastle has now arrived at Platform 8 Please note the Platform change", then about 30 seconds before the doors closed he came back and said "I appolagize the train to Leeds has now arrived at Platform 8", the newcastle train pulled into Platform 4 a minute after the Leeds had left.

 

[317666]

Probably because they don't normally call there?

I think they do, it was a Southampton Central - Brighton via Eastleigh service, and Southampton Airport Parkway was showing on the internal screens, just not being announced.

 

[MCR247]

It is a relatively recent addition, so they probably didn't sort announcements out yet, as they used to be non-stop Soton - Eastleigh

 

[class377man]

Platform 17 at Clapham Junction about seven years ago. Manual announcement in a heavy West Indian accent.

"Mind de gap...PLEASE MIND DE 'KING GAP!"

 

[lewisf]

I don't know why but I really like the way the announcer on SWT 455's says the word edge. As in "Please mind the gap between the train and the platform edge". It's got a proper 1950's BBC English twang to it.

Also heard Phil at East Croydon say "I have just been informed by London Underground that there are delays on the Metropolitan Line"

And there's a guard at Southern who refers to everyone on the train as "my passengers".

 

[londonbridge]

About a minute later an announcement was made stating: "We would like to apologise for the earlier announcements"

Roy

Reminds me of one of the Monty Python albums. It opens with an apology to anyone who bought the album believing it to be connected to Monty Python's Flying Circus as there was an error in the printing of the cover,and that the album is actually called Pleasures Of The Dance. After a short pause there is an apology for the previous apology,saying that it was unnecessary and it appeared on the record owing to an administrative error. The announce reassures listeners that the record is actually a Monty Python album.

This is then followed by an extract from Pleasures Of The Dance,followed by an announcement apologising for said extract,and saying that it appeared on the record owing to the same administrative error that resulted in the first apology.

Anyway,more than once I've heard Phil's announcements get stuck,similar to a record,and usually on the word "train". It usually gets stuck just after he's begun to say the 'a'.so it sounds like "tray" and ends up as "The approaching traytraytraytraytraytray.....",etc,for several seconds until someone shuts it off.

 

[chiltern_chidg]

The funniest thing I have heard was on Princes Risborough platform: "I am sorry to announce but the 15.30 service to Birmingham Snow Hill has been delayed by approximately two-hundred and thirty-five minutes. Please listen to further announcements. I am extremely sorry for the delay caused to this service".

I hope you would be 'extremely sorry' for a delay that long! Luckily, the delay on the 'Customer Information Screen' was only showing a delay of 20 minutes.

Another thing which I heard one morning when there was huge delays and cancelations due to a fatality at Brill tunnel (just outside of HDM, heading towards Bicester North) was an announcement over the PA system at about 11.30 am. "I am sorry to announce but the 07.46 service to London Marylebone has been cancelled. I am very sorry for the delay this has caused to your journey".

I don't know if it was intended deliberately to 'lighten the mood' on Haddenham & Thame Parkway platform but, everybody laughed! :P

Matthew

 

[Sun!]

My favourite (recent) announcement was "...delayed due to sheep on the line" shortly followed by "...the sheep have now boarded the train, so it will be along shortly"

Animal related delays can be very annoying.

Once going between Shrewsbury and Cardiff we sat idle on the track for around 50 minutes due to 'Cows on the line'.

Was god fun though.

 

[Crossover]

A couple of years back I was at Milton Keynes Central waiting for a train home and the announcer was generally funny the way he overemphasised everything, especially when saying Birmingham

I didn't get the "Birmingham" bit (which he puts emphasis on places that shouldn't have) but did manage to get a recording of him announcing an LM service to Euston.

See what you think!

 

[DiscoStu]

Not railway related, but was on a flight from Abu Dhabi to Amsterdam in May and a poor guy had sadly had a massive heart attack shortly after take off ( about six feet from where I was sitting :cry and was announced dead after an emergency landing in Doha.

Anyway, coming in to land in Amsterdam the pilot announces " ...for most of us this won't be the end of the journey. It looks a lovely day outside, so go out and enjoy it because as we've seen already today, you never know when it'll be your last"

Wasn't really sure what to make of that. I still don't know whether to think he was being unprofessional or not.

Thoughts?

 

[bus man]

I know this is off topic but very funny during the 1980s I was working in London, I was instructed to

"Proceed South In A Notherly Direction"

Several requests for the message to be repeated and then explained resulted in the following

Procceed South On The Norhern Line


A case of I know what I mean and you should tooo

 

[Bittern]

While we're off topic, I once saw a shop sign in Glasgow say "Sorry, we're open". It was near Central station so it is almost on-topic.

 

[MidnightFlyer]

Off topic a bit, sorry, but:

While we're off topic, I once saw a shop sign in Glasgow say "Sorry, we're open". It was near Central station so it is almost on-topic.

Not as good as a sign on a newspaper stand in London on Thursday: 'This is not a toilet, so please do not p*ss here.' causton has a pic of it I think...

 

[Anonywave]

I'm annoyed by apologies which are not from the person (or company) who has done anything to apologise for (such as an incident not the making of the train operator who apologises). What else could the Operator have done that they can apologise for not having done?

Perhaps they feel that they are apologising on behalf of another party?

 

[t o m]

Yesterday morning on SWT out of Waterloo the guard seemed quite a character. One of his announcements was "If you need any assistance just ask me. I'm the big, 6ft 4 bald bloke.".

 

[Simon Poole]

I had a funny one at Stafford, was there to film 2 Class 56's and an Class 50 a month or two ago, they put an announcemnt saying

Stand clear on Platform 4 for an passing yellow Train!

Which turned out to be two DRS Class 37's top and tail with one Network Rail Coach

 

[Crossover]

One that usually gets me at Stafford is one of the announcers who always says "number x platform" or I think I have heard on occasion "4 platform for the...." rather than "platform x" or "platform number x"

A month or so back at Stafford as well I was waiting for a train on platform 5. They made an announcement for "the next train at platform number 4 is the 17:03 Cross Country service to Cardiff Central. Calling at......." at which point he gets broken off as a Class 66 plus freight comes flying through platform 4 - these XC's really have changed recently