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Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

61653 HTAFC

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I’d like to nominate the pessimism of the online BBC weather forecast.
I’d like to nominate the optimism of the online BBC weather forecast.
I'd like to nominate any value judgement in weather forecasts. As Half Man Half Biscuit sang (in one of several songs that list various irritants):
"...opiniated weather forecasters telling me it's going to be a miserable day. I quite like a bit of drizzle so stick to the facts!"
 
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Bald Rick

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I stopped believing the BBC weather forecast a long time ago, having once gone out with it reporting full sun all day and then got hail coming on me around 30 minutes later. I wasn't best impressed! It hadn't been too accurate for a while before that, but that was the last straw.

More often than not I use the Met Office app, and it's not perfect but I have more faith in that than other weather forecasting services.

Yes BBC forecast accuracy went downhill precisely the same time as they switched from the Met Office to Meteo group.
 

32475

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Yes, precisely. Another unnecessary privatisation. ;)
The Met Office does still produce the Shipping Forecast - the most poetic daily broadcast known to mankind. God bless it and all who sail in it or listen to it in the small hours with a mug of cocoa.
 

Busaholic

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The Met Office does still produce the Shipping Forecast - the most poetic daily broadcast known to mankind. God bless it and all who sail in it or listen to it in the small hours with a mug of cocoa.
I Sail By regularly at 12.45 a.m.
 

Jimini

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I do miss the Radio 4 opening theme they used to play when switching back over from (I think) the World Service at 6am each day, just before the shipping forecast.
 

gg1

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Yes BBC forecast accuracy went downhill precisely the same time as they switched from the Met Office to Meteo group.
Thought oddly even when the Met Office produced the BBC forecasts, it wasn't unusual for the forecasts on the BBC and Met Office websites to differ.
 

bspahh

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Yes BBC forecast accuracy went downhill precisely the same time as they switched from the Met Office to Meteo group.
I prefer the Met Office predictions to the Meteosat ones from the BBC.

I also like the minutecasts at accuweather.com which predict when its going to rain for specific areas for the next 2 hours. This relies on radar, which does not pick up light rain, but it works pretty well when there is a well-defined band of heavier rain moving across the country.

Both the Met Office and Accuweather show frequently updated rain radars. If it was raining 10 miles away 10 minutes ago and the clouds are coming your way, then there is a pretty good chance that its going to rain where you are pretty soon.

For long distance forecasts, I like wxcharts.com which has a nice interface for the forecasts from the European Centre for Medium-Range Weather Forecasts. The detail for forecasts in 2 weeks time will be wrong, but you can get a feel for the weather. If there are depressions coming in from the Atlantic, the timing might be wrong, and sometimes the direction will change, but there will be a mix of cold fronts with steady rain, then showers and then a drier spell.

For live information on snow, www.uksnowmap.com is good
 

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Peter Mugridge

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Thought oddly even when the Met Office produced the BBC forecasts, it wasn't unusual for the forecasts on the BBC and Met Office websites to differ.
The forecasts on the BBC main news and the BBC local news a few minutes later frequently have different temperatures and cloud cover for a given area - and that's even happening when it's the same forecaster presenting both...

I'd ban that! It's inconsistent, especially given that both forecasts have come from the same data and have been generated at the same time.
 

dangie

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Certainly for the British Isles, long range weather forecasts are a waste of time. We have so many factors which influence our weather anything more than 2-3 days (and that’s being optimistic) is guesswork and more Mystic Meg than science.
 

Stan63

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I'd ban the use of Curse Of or From Hell in program titles. They are usually an hour of people complaining or hunting for non existant treasure.

Stan
 

Calthrop

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I'd ban the use of Curse Of or From Hell in program titles.

(My bolding) -- going off at a tangent from the bolded; but -- with From Hell being the title of a quite-acclaimed film, and a ditto graphic novel, about Jack the Ripper: thoughts engendered about a thing which, in a world totally organised to please me, I'd love to see banned. Namely -- anything at all to do with the aforesaid 19th-century personage. Ideally, I'd like to see a concerted campaign -- up to and including the use of brainwashing, if necessary -- to obliterate the wretched fellow and his story, from human consciousness for all time to come.

I've from the outset -- this, just my own feeling and I'd have been willing to live and let live -- found the whole Jack the Ripper thing, to me totally uninteresting. What really "put the lid on it" for me, was my having a couple of decades ago, had for a couple of years a work colleague who was as knowledgeable and passionate about all things Jack-the-Ripper as, say, was the late J.I.C. Boyd about the Ffestiniog Railway. Furthermore: this was a job with a lot of "down-time" in which one might chew the fat or otherwise do one's own thing; and this guy was a highly garrulous individual, of the "monologist" kind. He could, and frequently did, drone on for hours about the J the R saga and its complexities and minutiae -- he needed no reciprocal input from his victims, he just talked at them; he couldn't be silenced, nor be diverted to another subject -- and we were employed there, and couldn't just walk away. (He was a nice enough chap otherwise; he just needed a small bit of brain surgery re this topic.) Consequence for me -- utter loathing of anything about our boy Jack, and lack of any scintilla of interest as to who he might really have been, etc. etc.
 
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py_megapixel

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Has anyone mentioned the phrase "contact number"?

I find it grating and much prefer "phone number" - "contact number" feels incomplete without a description of how one uses the number to contact someone.
 

dangie

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More major than minor:
US President Joe Biden has flown into the UK to meet with King Charles plus the Prime Minister etc on his way to Lithuania for Climate Change Finance talks.

Looking at YouTube videos showing Biden‘s arrival at Stansted Airport you’d be excused in thinking climate change was non-existent. Isn’t one aircraft enough?
 

Thirteen

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People who get angry at inanimate objects. I saw someone hitting a wall with their umbrella and shouting at the umbrella as being a piece of poo which I thought was strange as the umbrella can't reply back.
 

Calthrop

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People getting angry at inanimate objects, is one of my favourite things in the general "human comedy"; but as we know, one person's pet hate is another's source of delight.
 

Bald Rick

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People who wait at a pedestrian crossing for the green man, but don’t pay attention to said green man (usually chatting to friends or on their phone), miss the green man until the very last second, and the dawdle across.
 

dangie

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People who wait at a pedestrian crossing for the green man, but don’t pay attention to said green man (usually chatting to friends or on their phone), miss the green man until the very last second, and the dawdle across.
People who walk up to a pedestrian crossing, press the button, THEN look up and down the road, see nothing coming, then cross the road. Why not look first, see nothing coming, then cross the road. Don’t press the button…!!
 

duncanp

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People who walk up to a pedestrian crossing, press the button, THEN look up and down the road, see nothing coming, then cross the road. Why not look first, see nothing coming, then cross the road. Don’t press the button…!!

People who don't start to cross the road when the light turns to green, often because they have their head buried in their phone.
 

yorksrob

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Drivers (mainly BMW drivers) who decide to rev up, just as you're walking in front of them on a pedestrian crossing.

Suitable punishment would be cubification of said motor vehicle.
 

AM9

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Unnecessarily noisy cars on public roads. If somebody wants a fast car to potter around in built-up areas, they can have them, but there's no necessity for them to have exhaust systems louder than any other car. Add to that the tendency of their owners to drive the, noisily, presumably, because they regard it as a badge of honour that their possession can make unsociable levels of disturbance, means that they are a considerable nuisance to many.
 

Trainguy34

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Unnecessarily noisy cars on public roads. If somebody wants a fast car to potter around in built-up areas, they can have them, but there's no necessity for them to have exhaust systems louder than any other car. Add to that the tendency of their owners to drive the, noisily, presumably, because they regard it as a badge of honour that their possession can make unsociable levels of disturbance, means that they are a considerable nuisance to many.
Similarly to this, People who drive unnecessary loud motorbikes at 8/9pm in loops near your house.
 

Mcr Warrior

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Unnecessarily noisy cars on public roads. If somebody wants a fast car to potter around in built-up areas, they can have them, but there's no necessity for them to have exhaust systems louder than any other car.
May have mentioned this upthread previously, but have often wondered just how these souped-up noise polluters manage to get their cars through an annual MOT. (Or maybe they don't!) :s
 

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