Auto Anouncments - Errors/funny sayings

[Jonfun]

Not strictly an auto-announcer, but the auto-screens in the GMPTE area were quite funny when I was on a tour:

DESTINATION: CHARTER SERVICE
CALLING AT: CHARTER SERVICE only
SERVICE OPERATED BY: CHARTER SERVICE

Headed outward on the Deltic Retro Scot at Wigan NW (I think it was), we had:

Destination: Charter Service
Calling at: Charter Service
Operated by: Wessex Trains

 

[kvbham]

A new automated announcement at New Street today - never heard it before... by Phil "May I have your attention please. Due to the freezing conditions today... ...please take extra care"

 

[EM2]

I liked it at Ealing Broadway when a Heathrow Express 332 flew through... then 3 seconds later "will passengers at platform one please stand back - through train approaching". Oops, too late

Forest Gate is good for that too, when the Norwich services go through

 

[P156KWJ]

A new automated announcement at New Street today - never heard it before... by Phil "May I have your attention please. Due to the freezing conditions today... ...please take extra care"

I like it at Nottingham how the muffly marge voice differs slightly as they recently had to add 'Northern, Meadowhall, Barnsley, Wakefield Kirkgate' in to it for the new Leeds services and her pitch and volume is slightly out, so it sounds odd when mixed with stations it already had in it

On NET trams the auto announcers rarely break, but recently it appeared to have messed up where we were supposed to be going. It was an odd service that terminates quite early at Shipstone Street to allow it to transfer to the depot. "This tram is for... Phoenix Park. The next stop is Lace Market". Then when arriving at SS "This is Shipstone Street. This tram is for Phoenix Park. The next stop is Wilkinson Street" When it should have just said "This is Shipstone Street" (they don't have 'all change' for some reason)

 

[HSTfan!!!]

A new automated announcement at New Street today - never heard it before... by Phil "May I have your attention please. Due to the freezing conditions today... ...please take extra care"

You'd be amazed the announcements you've never heard buried away, there is a long list on our system of disruption announcements for the most random of reasons. On a gorgeous summers day I couldn't resist putting out "Services are disrupted due to... snow"

 

[Jim]

I've dropped a few clangers myself when I've been making announcements. I once told everyone we were arriving at Whaley Bridge when, in fact, we were terminating at Manchester Piccadilly! Guffaw!

I hate it when there is other people in an office with you and they make you laugh just before or even during the darn announcement!
--- old post above --- --- new post below ---

You'd be amazed the announcements you've never heard buried away, there is a long list on our system of disruption announcements for the most random of reasons. On a gorgeous summers day I couldn't resist putting out "Services are disrupted due to... snow"

Digital Dorris FTW...
--- old post above --- --- new post below ---

Ah yes, the beggars one! That makes me chuckle when I hear that coming out of Waterloo - you just don't expect to hear it!

I got that on a Wareham-Brockenhurst stopper once! About Sept '07

 

[me123]

I've never heard the Scotrail auto-lady at stations say Edinburgh before; I've never been to a station where she would need to say it until yesterday. But she sounds very optimistic when she announces the train's destination. Her voice jumps about an octave higher

 

[HSTfan!!!]

I hate it when there is other people in an office with you and they make you laugh just before or even during the darn announcement!

I'm usually laughing my head off when doing announcements lol

 

[The_Rail_WAy]

Was at York station once when the announcer had a sneezing frenzy. Literally halfway through the 'script' - she mut have done about 6 in a row!! Was rather amusing and put a smile on alot of commuters faces!

 

[thefab444]

These may make you chuckle...

The delightful announcer at Oxford informs customers what's on offer at Worcester Foregate Street Buffet.

Some problems at Newcastle causing havoc on CrossCountry at Basingstoke.

CrossCountry have introduced a new Gatwick - Birmingham & Northampton service.

Due to a broken down train at Southampton, SWT trains are terminating at Ashurst New Forest with CrossCountry providing the service.

SWT discover they've run out of stock.

Enjoy.

 

[The_Rail_WAy]

These may make you chuckle...

The delightful announcer at Oxford informs customers what's on offer at Worcester Foregate Street Buffet.


SWT discover they've run out of stock.

Enjoy.

Those two were absolutely hilarious!

 

[KaiserBurton]

One of my collegues when arriving at Whaley Bridge likes to say "We are now arriving at Whaley Bridge, will passengers leaving the train please fall down the gap thankyou"

 

[EE Type 3]

Shrewsbury yesterday, 57s covering for a 175, they were mega late into Shrewbury, retimed to 2001. The arrival time comes. The road has been given. Several announcements for the service. 2008 and the 57s pull in, Rob comes over the tannoy. "Finally!" A chuckle went around the station

 

[Pumbaa]

Shrewsbury yesterday, 57s covering for a 175, they were mega late into Shrewbury, retimed to 2001. The arrival time comes. The road has been given. Several announcements for the service. 2008 and the 57s pull in, Rob comes over the tannoy. "Finally!" A chuckle went around the station

Crikey; an entire year late! Never mind, they made up 7 years before they got to Shrewsbury, so hopefully most passengers were happy

 

[EE Type 3]

Crikey; an entire year late! Never mind, they made up 7 years before they got to Shrewsbury, so hopefully most passengers were happy

Would probably explain the sound of relief in his voice

 

[kvbham]

Different things happening at New Street Station for the last few weeks - it now says "Birmingham New Street; This is Birmingham New Street" and the announcements don't seem to be broadcasted to all areas of the concourse -- just the platforms!!

Did anybody else notice?

 

[37401]

yup i noticed that one mate.

at rugby last year "Virgin Pendolino service..." then a 221 turns up

 

[WillPS]

I noticed the screens at Sheffield now post up "CrossCountry HST" where relevant. Bizarre that the HST has become the 'premium' vehicle of the CrossCountry fleet again!

 

[johnb]

I noticed the screens at Sheffield now post up "CrossCountry HST" where relevant. Bizarre that the HST has become the 'premium' vehicle of the CrossCountry fleet again!

Err, the reason they say HST is because that makes it a different length from a Voyager, not because it's OMG T3H AWESOME!

 

[Mojo]

Different things happening at New Street Station for the last few weeks - it now says "Birmingham New Street; This is Birmingham New Street" and the announcements don't seem to be broadcasted to all areas of the concourse -- just the platforms!!

Yes, there are now individual platform announcements but some announcements are still broadcast all over, I've definately noticed the ones where the train is now standing on the platform are platform specific.

 

[90019]

Yes, there are now individual platform announcements but some announcements are still broadcast all over, I've definately noticed the ones where the train is now standing on the platform are platform specific.

Hearing different announcements for different platforms at the same time when i was there a few days ago was wierd.

 

[poshbakerloo]

The Transpennine Express 185s have a very annoying voice that does there...
mis-pronounces words all the time and finishes a sentence as if it is asking a question!

 

[Oswyntail]

The Transpennine Express 185s have a very annoying voice that does there...
mis-pronounces words all the time and finishes a sentence as if it is asking a question!

I especially like the way that every station is announced in clear, "received" pronunciation, except " 'uddersfield"

 

[Jordy]

She used to say "Huddersfield" in a happy voice, but for some reason it was re recorded, so now she says "Uddersfield!!!" and sounds angry!

They have also re recorded "Thirsk" and "Leeds" as you can tell in this Clip

BHM sounds interesting, if it has been upgraded like they said it would be, can it now do catering, and divides?

 

[Geezertronic]

BHM sounds interesting, if it has been upgraded like they said it would be, can it now do catering, and divides?

With any luck, they'll start rebuilding the bugger and get rid of all that bleeding concrete and shopping centre above, then put some proper facilities in it rather than the expensive on-platform vending machines

 

[RochdalePioneers]

Had a quick jaunt from Fort Bill to Mallaig and back this morning. Scrolling LED displays inside the 156 and the computerised announcer were a station or two behind all the way, and as we pulled to a halt at Mallaig it announced our arrival at Arisaig...

 

[thefab444]

With any luck, they'll start rebuilding the bugger and get rid of all that bleeding concrete and shopping centre above, then put some proper facilities in it rather than the expensive on-platform vending machines

I think Jordy was referring to the announcements being able to advise customers on what kind of catering service is available on the train.

 

[mikehcfc]

Always remember the announcer at Doncaster appologizing for a train being early

 

[Mojo]

Birmingham New Street now has the female voice on alternate platform islands, and has retained "Phil" on the others, and also for the general announcements such as smoking. Platform screens and announcements still don't show splitting trains, but the LED ones on the bridges and main concourse still do (as they used to).

 

[Philip Elliott]

Birmingham New Street now has the female voice on alternate platform islands, and has retained "Phil" on the others, and also for the general announcements such as smoking. Platform screens and announcements still don't show splitting trains, but the LED ones on the bridges and main concourse still do (as they used to).

Plaform 9 now has Celia on it...