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2016 Predictions

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Domh245

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It is that time of year again. 2016 is almost upon us, so let's have a bit of fun and try to predict what will happen in this coming year: Rail, News, and forum based! Serious predictions in plain text, and more jovial predictions in Italics, so let's get underway!

The new Northern and TPE franchises will be criticised by the public for not being an instant fix

The first 700 enters service. Regular passengers don't care about the lack of tables

After trials in which it performs well, the D-train is quietly forgotten as nobody quite needs them

England reach semi-finals of the Euros. Lose after penalty shootout

Over to you!
 
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mikeg

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Can't comment on the railways, nothing immediately comes to mind but I predict a deep recession in China along with debt deflation, further making the situaion worse. The level of private debt in that economy is abnormally high and I predict contagion within the larger world economy
 

backontrack

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IN 2016:

NEWS:

-No flood aid arrives for the north of England except for a couple of sandbags in Manchester

-The Foss Barrier remains faulty

-Corbyn is destroyed by the media

-Doctor Who regenerates

-Star Wars doesn't win the Oscar, somehow

-The TV show Lewis will end 'for the final time' again as the whole student population of Oxford is found floating in the River Cherwell or the Isis (which David Cameron decides to rename)

-England go out at group stages/quarter finals

-Leicester don't win the Premiership

-David Walliams becomes the next Bond


RAILWAYS (and RailUK):

-Bermuda Park doesn't open

-Low Moor does open

-Letter by Letter ends

-Rangers wins the fantasy football league

-HMS Ark Royal becomes a moderator

-After the 442s, every enthusiast cries themselves to sleep for a month - except those who don't really care, of course

-Even tbtc cries

-Pacers are scrapped
- we all know that won't happen
 
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TheNewNo2

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RailUK Forums announces conclusive proof of the existence of the Loch Ness Monster. Turns out it was a false flag operation by Mossad agents working in concert with the New World Order to prevent the refurbishment of class 442 EMUs.

The year will end with still no one knowing quite what the point of franchising is.

The new Star Trek film will be a decent film, but not a Star Trek film.

Donald Trump will be on the ballot in the US presidential election in November, though I won't predict whether that will be as an independent or a Republican.

Something contrived will again prevent Castle and Beckett from being able to enjoy a happily married life solving murders.

There will be a significant operating incident on the UK railways, which will cause a number of passenger injuries.

My cat will still not eat what we put down for him.

JNP will remain the best-performing InfraCo within London Underground.

The year will end without an agreement on Night Tube, and thus probably without agreement on my pay rise.

The new Doctor will be a woman.
 

telstarbox

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Sadiq Khan will win the London mayoral election.

Chelsea will finish in the bottom half of the table.

The Night Tube will be introduced in the first half of the year.

Another TOC will introduce free wifi in standard class.
 

Domh245

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These are all good, but they aren't quite Bald Rick's post from last years equivalent thread!

How about some Rail Forums predictions... (With apologies in advance to those that are mentioned, it is good natured I promise!)

Trip Planning and Reports: Techniquest gets his last Scotrail unit in February, and to celebrate eschews BK and goes to 'the Scottish Restaurant' (for a Big Mac)

International Transport: in March, someone asks about connection time from Eurostar to Thalys at Brussels Midi.

Disputes and Prosecutions: only 1,658 new posters claim to have forgotten to pay their fare, they've never done it before, honest guv, and it only happened because the machine wouldn't take Guernsey pound coins / refused 5 different credit cards / the dog ate my delay repay vouchers.

Railway Jobs and Careers: Someone gets a driver job on their first application.

Traction and Rolling Stock: The debate about seat comfort on class 387 and 700s continues throughout the year, with forum members taking rulers and pliance meters on board to measure padding depth and 'give'. A new correspondent from Paris, a Monsieur Ricard de N'avec-Cheveux-Pas, invites everyone over to sample the upholstery on RER line A, which settles the argument once and for all when it is realised there isn't any.

Meanwhile in May, a new forum member asks if anyone has any opinion on Voyagers. The internet goes down for a fortnight.

Infrastructure and Stations: on April 1st, a new poster asks what those funny white signs are underneath platforms with the red sliders on and the numbers alongside. You know, the ones that look like faders on a mixer. Railsigns explodes.

The NR Route Managing Director (Western) discovers the Dawlish Sea Wall thread, and has it printed off for bedtime reading at Easter. He finishes it in September, and recycles the 28,000 tonnes of paper as an off shore sea defence. The locals are up in arms about the loss of tourists due to there being no 'exciting wave action' and demand the return of his MBE.

Every thread discussing possible reopening of lines closed during the Beeching has comments complaining of the shortsightedness of those decisions approximately 50 years ago (before most of the posters were born). Meanwhile another thread predicting what is going to happen this year gets it 90% wrong....

UK Railway Discussion:

A Daily Mail article on how 'hopeless' the railway is gets both barrels in a public Facebook response from a TOC MD, with a quote of 'why let the facts get in the way of a story'. The journo is too scared to respond.

Meanwhile jonmorris0844 posts to announce that he has been sent a fancy new winter jacket, which arrived unsolicited, postmarked Derby. A week later two of the buttons fall off.

Three weeks before every new franchise is due to be announced, a poster confidently predicts who will win it, based on a discussion with a bloke down the pub who once played tennis with the wife of an ex guard who knows someone who empties the bins in the York drivers' signing on point. Three weeks later the announcement is made, and it is a surprise to everyone, not least the winner.

October sees a dramatic twist, with the latest wiki-leaks release giving out the real names of all Rail Forums members. It is realised that those who appear to be knowledgeable about all things rail related are either a) actually working for North Korean intelligence, b) 14 year old girls taking the p*ss, or c) rail employees just making it up for a laugh.

And finally, on December 31st infobleep posts to say he has finally caught an SWT service that runs on time. Unfortunately it is scheduled to reach Guildford at 0001, and therefore counts as next year.


Happy New Year!

It's quite interesting to see how well some of last years predictions have held up!
 

backontrack

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There are some really good ones such as these:

fandroid said:
Virgin Trains reduce their London-Liverpool service in order to find enough trains to serve more important places like Blackpool and Shrewsbury

On their Bicester services Chiltern start making on-train announcement exclusively in Mandarin

The Bite Card discount will go down to 5% (without announcement) and the promised 'even more rewards' will fail to materialise, just like last year

Virgin will increase the volume of the 'Bing Bong' that precedes announcements, because they feel that really deaf people cannot hear them.

An ISIS plotter will infiltrate ATOC and increase security announcements on trains to the point where passengers are driven to murdering the on-train staff

Boris Johnson will introduce red double deck trains on London Overground as they are a 'London Icon'
 

ExRes

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My prediction for the most unlikely event of 2016

The many posters on this forum who like to think that they are intellectually superior by running down the Daily Mail and attempting to use it as a swearword, will stop quoting from it .............
 

Antman

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My prediction for the most unlikely event of 2016

The many posters on this forum who like to think that they are intellectually superior by running down the Daily Mail and attempting to use it as a swearword, will stop quoting from it .............

Yes we can but hope!
 
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2016.......

Football
:Chelsea get relegated
: Leicester qualify for the Champions League
: Radamel Falcao will return to Colombia
: Sunderland get relegated ( Hoping this happens ;) )

Trains
: 442s will get exported to Iran to replace 141s, Suddenly Iran is flooded with RailUKForums enthusiasts, Irans railway will make the biggest profit in its entire history
: VTEC Ruin the east coast even more
: Crosscountrys Voyagers seats become even more worn.
: A Heaton 156 is written off, A Newton Heath 142 with Merseyrail seats replaces it
: The Leamside Line gets the green light
: The Blyth and Tyne gets the green light
: Class 700s will be bugged with problems
: GWML electrification will be delayed another 15 years.
 

St Rollox

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Rangers to go back into administration and the Scottish Labour Party to disappear even further at the elections in May.
 

backontrack

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2016.......

Football
:Chelsea get relegated
: Leicester qualify for the Champions League
: Radamel Falcao will return to Colombia
: Sunderland get relegated ( Hoping this happens ;) )

Trains
: 442s will get exported to Iran to replace 141s, Suddenly Iran is flooded with RailUKForums enthusiasts, Irans railway will make the biggest profit in its entire history
: VTEC Ruin the east coast even more
: Crosscountrys Voyagers seats become even more worn.
: A Heaton 156 is written off, A Newton Heath 142 with Merseyrail seats replaces it
: The Leamside Line gets the green light
: The Blyth and Tyne gets the green light
: Class 700s will be bugged with problems
: GWML electrification will be delayed another 15 years.

Well. there's been talk of Iran becoming a 'holiday destination'... :lol:
 

Bevan Price

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Predictions.These will not happen:-

1. Politicians tell us the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
2. All newspapers will give honest, politically unbiased reporting of UK politics.
3. Withdrawal of Pacers will commence.
4. A rail electrification scheme will be completed early and below budget.
5. St. Helens RLFC will win every match.
6. MUFC will be relegated (in successive years to non league status.)
7. Liverpool FC will learn how to score goals themselves, and not give away silly goals to opponents.
8. Aston Villa will win another match this season, but then win enough next season to return to top flight football in 2017.
9. Chelsea will have another 2 or 3 new managers before December 2016
10. TV will decide that "soaps" are long past their sell-by dates and suppress opportunities for creating new, original dramas.
11. Shops will delay promoting Christmas goods until mid-November.
 

Johnuk123

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I predict that within weeks the whole population of the country that aren't labour supporters and therefore have the intelligence of a whelk will be discoverd to have brains totally controlled by Mossad via the Daily Mail.
 

me123

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Jeremy Corbyn will remain Labour leader this year. He will not be a groundbreaking leader of the opposition, but will continue to be heavily slandered by his opponents.
The SNP will win a further majority government in Holyrood. Kezia Dugdale will resign shortly afterward. Independence will not be a major issue for the next year.
The EU referendum probably won't happen until 2017. The government will try to play down the Europe question, to the anger of the Daily Mail.
George Osborne makes a Freudian slip and accidentally refers to the "Northern Workhouse".
Donald Trump will secure the Republican nomination, but will prove controversial enough not to win the presidency, which will be secured by Hillary Clinton in a divisive and bitter election campaign. Trump's campaign will be by far the most expensive in electoral history.
In Obama's last days in office, he will become more vociferous in his arguments for gun control, and will be officially labelled the "worst president in US history" by Fox News.
After another gun attack at a US elementary school, the NRA will launch a range of colourful automatic machine guns aimed at children.
Somewhere in the UK, probably London, will be threatened with a major terrorist attack.
The US will continue to be targeted by Islamic terrorism, however domestic Christian terrorism in family planning clinics will still claim more lives. The issue will be glossed over by the media.
Action against Daesh will be vociferously argued for by the vast majority of people in the Western world, but a lack of agreement means that the action that is taken will be uncoordinated and largely ineffective.
Junior Doctors in England will strike. However, they will be largely unsuccessful and will have a contract very similar to the proposed contract imposed on them. There will be significant gaps in training posts in August.
Queen Elizabeth will suffer a health scare, but will survive the year.
No decision will be made on runway expansion in the South East.
Andy Murray will reach the Wimbledon final, but will not win.
Ryanair will continue to boast about plans for long haul expansion. This will be more hot-air publicity stunts with no substance behind it.

There will be continued allegations of VTEC service standards deteriorating, and the First Class thread will go into overdrive.
Scotrail will face unprecedented criticism following the closure of the Queen Street tunnel for five months. Ridership on the rails will see a short-medium term decline after the line reopens, as passengers take to the road, and will take some time to recover. The introduction of Class 385 trains at the end of the year will only partially placate commuters.
Pacers will undergo a life extension program that will consist of a quick hoover only.
442s will be withdrawn. Rail enthusiasts across the country will be in tears, and thousands of posts on this forum will be made lamenting the loss of the "greatest train ever built".
 

bb21

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I am delighted to be able to report that I have (nearly) made it to the end of the year without exploding. :)

Excuse me, what is that white thing in your avatar? ;)

Does it measure the porosity level of the tracks?
 

ainsworth74

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442s will be withdrawn. Rail enthusiasts across the country will be in tears, and thousands of posts on this forum will be made lamenting the loss of the "greatest train ever built".

If that's going to be the reaction to the 442s going god help us when the HST get turned into razor blades...
 

mikeg

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More silly changes to the routeing guide, cross-country adding more 2v restrictions where the 8x restriction previously stood in the year's third edition of the nfm. Maybe I shouldn't give them ideas... They're already getting rid of the BT restrictions for 2v onds
 
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Minilad

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Predictions.These will not happen:-

1. Politicians tell us the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
2. All newspapers will give honest, politically unbiased reporting of UK politics.
3. Withdrawal of Pacers will commence.
4. A rail electrification scheme will be completed early and below budget.
5. St. Helens RLFC will win every match.
6. MUFC will be relegated (in successive years to non league status.)
7. Liverpool FC will learn how to score goals themselves, and not give away silly goals to opponents.
8. Aston Villa will win another match this season, but then win enough next season to return to top flight football in 2017.
9. Chelsea will have another 2 or 3 new managers before December 2016
10. TV will decide that "soaps" are long past their sell-by dates and suppress opportunities for creating new, original dramas.
11. Shops will delay promoting Christmas goods until mid-November.

Steady on there
 

Minilad

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My prediction for the most unlikely event of 2016

The many posters on this forum who like to think that they are intellectually superior by running down the Daily Mail and attempting to use it as a swearword, will stop quoting from it .............

I think most people quote from it to highlight the absurdity of it's reporting
 
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