Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

[dangie]

The various Clean Air Acts would be a greater factor, I would have thought?

Yes you are probably correct on that.

 

[AM9]

...and conversely the idiots who drive with fog lights on when they don't need them. Highway code says visibility of 100 metres or less not when it's raining or in some cases it's dark!
The front fog lights are there to light up the kerb not to enable you to be seen.

I also occasionally use rear fog lights when there is heavy spray on the road, I rarely encounter snow but that is another time that their use should be considered.

 

[Richard Scott]

I also occasionally use rear fog lights when there is heavy spray on the road, I rarely encounter snow but that is another time that their use should be considered.

But you shouldn't if visibility more than 100metres. In conditions other than poor visibility they are dazzling and a distraction and can make brake lights harder to spot.
I can easily see cars in both heavy spray and snow with normal lights on, if you can't then please get your eyes checked as may not meet standard for safe driving.
The clue really is in the name of fog lights, I have never used them in any other conditions for reason stated above.

 

[Lewisham2221]

A few more driving related ones:

People who correctly use their rear fog lights when passing through heavy fog then, after passing through said fog, leave them on for the next 7 miles...

People who slow to almost walking pace at the first sight of a snow flake...

People who don't use headlights when it's raining - even more so when they are driving a grey or silver car - it's almost like they want someone to pull out in front of them...

 

[Peter Mugridge]

But you shouldn't if visibility more than 100 metres. In conditions other than poor visibility they are dazzling and a distraction and can make brake lights harder to spot.
I can easily see cars in both heavy spray and snow with normal lights on, if you can't then please get your eyes checked as may not meet standard for safe driving.
The clue really is in the name of fog lights, I have never used them in any other conditions for reason stated above.

Surely if the visibility is over 100 metres it's not heavy spray in the first place?

While being a passenger on Tuesday last week 3rd September in conditions that most certainly qualified as heavy spray on the M42 and M5 between the M40 and the M6 I would say that total visibility was worse than fog - most cars were only visible by their roofs showing above the spray and their normal rear lights most certainly were NOT visible at all; even the brake lights were only barely visible.

One factor affecting the visibility of rear lights seems to be the numbers of cars where the backs ends are not being kept properly clean; it doesn't take a lot of dirt on the lights to seriously reduce their intensity. Another factor is the huge number of cars I see which only have one light working in the first place... although that's probably something for a separate debate...

 

[Merle Haggard]

The various Clean Air Acts would be a greater factor, I would have thought?

Yes, it's curious how fog is so rare now. We never thought of it as 'smog' but it must have been.
I remember about November 1962 the fog was very thick indeed in Northampton and I particularly remember bunking the shed (a 2P 4-4-0 was allegedly there) and truthfully not being able to see my feet (obvious dangers, I know) there.
The last thick fog I remember was probably late 1970s - early 1980s, I'm not sure that that co-incides with the Clean Air Act itself, more that the then cheap North Sea gas resulted in conversion to gas central heating rather than coal fires - price led rather than legislation - led possibly.

 

[Lewisham2221]

The various Clean Air Acts would be a greater factor, I would have thought?

Worst fog I've witnessed (born in the 80's) was on 5th November about 12 years ago - I could barely see more than a car length in front of me whilst driving - so I would definitely concur

 

[Richard Scott]

Surely if the visibility is over 100 metres it's not heavy spray in the first place?

While being a passenger on Tuesday last week 3rd September in conditions that most certainly qualified as heavy spray on the M42 and M5 between the M40 and the M6 I would say that total visibility was worse than fog - most cars were only visible by their roofs showing above the spray and their normal rear lights most certainly were NOT visible at all; even the brake lights were only barely visible.

One factor affecting the visibility of rear lights seems to be the numbers of cars where the backs ends are not being kept properly clean; it doesn't take a lot of dirt on the lights to seriously reduce their intensity. Another factor is the huge number of cars I see which only have one light working in the first place... although that's probably something for a separate debate...

I have never driven in such heavy spray that I can't see 100yards, visibility is still greater than 100 yards. I have driven in some appalling conditions where been crawling as weather is so bad but that doesn't warrant fog lights as can still see the cars and can also see when they're stopping. Drive to the conditions, that doesn't mean always resort to the fog lights. I've seen people driving way faster than they should with fog lamps on, if you need fog lamps on you should be well under 70mph.

 

[D6130]

Sandwiches filled with grated cheese. You bite into them and bits fly everywhere....then trying to hold them together - especially very generously-filled ones - is a nightmare. You end up with almost as much cheese on your clothes or on the floor as in your mouth. Please use slices of cheese for sandwiches people!

 

[Welly]

Sandwiches filled with grated cheese. You bite into them and bits fly everywhere....then trying to hold them together - especially very generously-filled ones - is a nightmare. You end up with almost as much cheese on your clothes or in the floor as in your mouth. Please use slices of cheese for sandwiches people!

I remember my work colleague complaining about the messy grated cheese sandwich that his wife prepared for him. He made me think about him playing away with a female colleague and that his wife must be hinting something there!

 

[gg1]

Sandwiches filled with grated cheese. You bite into them and bits fly everywhere....then trying to hold them together - especially very generously-filled ones - is a nightmare. You end up with almost as much cheese on your clothes or in the floor as in your mouth. Please use slices of cheese for sandwiches people!

The only time I ever grate cheese is if I'm planning to toast it, for cold sandwiches it's sliced or nothing.

== Doublepost prevention - post automatically merged: 8 Sep 2024 ==

Worst fog I've witnessed (born in the 80's) was on 5th November about 12 years ago - I could barely see more than a car length in front of me whilst driving - so I would definitely concur

The worst one I recall was also on 5th November, though back in the 80s. It also happened to be a Saturday so the number of bonfires was somewhat higher than a midweek 5th November turning the fog into smog. I remember walking to a local firework display around half a mile from where we lived at the time where visibility couldn't have been more than 5-10 metres.

 

[Cambus731]

People referring to this planet as 'The Earth'
The correct name for this planet is Earth.

 

[dangie]

The worst one I recall was also on 5th November, though back in the 80s.…. I remember walking to a local firework display around half a mile from where we lived at the time where visibility couldn't have been more than 5-10 metres.

An irritation of mine is when imperial measurements are combined with metric measurements. I used to buy wood 2inch x2inch square by 2metres long.

I think it’s about time we changed from miles to kilometres. Not for any real practical reason, but my cycle rides will appear further

 

[gg1]

An irritation of mine is when imperial measurements are combined with metric measurements. I used to buy wood 2inch x2inch square by 2metres long.

I think it’s about time we changed from miles to kilometres. Not for any real practical reason, but my cycle rides will appear further

An inevitable side effect of the 'almost but not quite' approach the UK took in switching from imperial to metric. Due to all UK road signs displaying distances in miles I always visualise longer distances in that unit, when I see a measurement quoted in kilometres I mentally convert it to miles. I would have no objection whatsoever if we followed Ireland's approach from a few decades ago and changed all signs from miles to kilometres.

I use metric for everything with two exceptions, miles and feet/inches when referring to a person's height.

 

[zero]

An inevitable side effect of the 'almost but not quite' approach the UK took in switching from imperial to metric. Due to all UK road signs displaying distances in miles I always visualise longer distances in that unit, when I see a measurement quoted in kilometres I mentally convert it to miles. I would have no objection whatsoever if we followed Ireland's approach from a few decades ago and changed all signs from miles to kilometres.

I use metric for everything with two exceptions, miles and feet/inches when referring to a person's height.

In the UK I operate in miles (and mph and pence per mile), and in other countries I operate in km (and km/h and currency per km).

What is odd is that despite being able to multiply and divide by 1.6 in my head easily, I find it difficult to imagine km distances in the UK and mile distances in other countries.

 

[bspahh]

In the UK I operate in miles (and mph and pence per mile), and in other countries I operate in km (and km/h and currency per km).

What is odd is that despite being able to multiply and divide by 1.6 in my head easily, I find it difficult to imagine km distances in the UK and mile distances in other countries.

Effectively, I remember the 1.609 times table from the mph values for kmh speed limits:
50kmh 31mph
60kmh 37mph
70kmh 44mph
80kmh 50mph
90kmh 56mph
100kmh 62mph
110kmh 68mph
120kmh 75mph
130kmh 81mph

You can read these off a car speedometer. 120kmh is 74 mph, so 12km is 7.4m miles.

 

[Ediswan]

The BBC irk me when quoting the weight of a person in kg (lb). The UK traditional units of weight (person) are stones and pounds, often just the stones.

 

[Merle Haggard]

An irritation of mine is when imperial measurements are combined with metric measurements. I used to buy wood 2inch x2inch square by 2metres long.

I think it’s about time we changed from miles to kilometres. Not for any real practical reason, but my cycle rides will appear further

Did any fellow cynic notice also that, in media reports of progress in the Iraq war, the distance from the border already covered by the army was reported in kilometres and the distance to Baghdad in miles?

 

[GordonT]

I would ban the articulation of "silent" letters in words having earlier today heard a BBC presenter on an after breakfast programme gushing favourably about someone's "sing-ging" with the word singing being pronounced with a particularly hard 'g'.

 

[GatwickDepress]

Railway videos on YouTube where the sound of a train is drowned out by a crescendo of camera shutters clicking, as if you're standing in the middle of a typing pool.

 

[simonw]

The BBC irk me when quoting the weight of a person in kg (lb). The UK traditional units of weight (person) are stones and pounds, often just the stones.

My doctors weigh people in kilograms. I imagine this is the norm.

 

[Merle Haggard]

The B.B.C. seem to have a style policy that plural nouns of non-English form should be shown by an 's' rather than the native plural. There is use of 'Stadiums' for instance.
Although they are a member of 'the Media' they don't seem to appreciate that that very word is a non-English plural. By their own logic a late afternoon programme on radio 4 should be called, for uniformity with their policy, 'The Mediums Show'. Worse, its presenter used 'media' when referring to the single case.
The B.B.C. should know better. I'll forgive "paninis" even "gateaux's" (IKEA cafe) because the writer is not employed primarily for the dissemination of information accurately and clearly, they're just doing their job.

 

[dangie]

My doctors weigh people in kilograms. I imagine this is the norm.

We have our bathroom scales set to stones/pounds. To be honest off the top of my head I haven’t a clue as to what my weight is in kilograms.

 

[DelW]

An irritation of mine is when imperial measurements are combined with metric measurements. I used to buy wood 2inch x2inch square by 2metres long.

Around fifty years ago when I started working on site, the construction industry had only just gone metric. One day I asked one of the labourers to measure something for me, and lent him my steel tape with both metric and imperial scales. He did so, came back looking a bit puzzled and told me (something like) "it's two metres and four and a half inches". That took a bit of working out.

The B.B.C. should know better. I'll forgive "paninis" even "gateaux's" (IKEA cafe) because the writer is not employed primarily for the dissemination of information accurately and clearly, they're just doing their job.

If I'm out with cousins who are half Italian (and fluent in the language), woe betide me if I try to order "a panini".

 

[Mcr Warrior]

My doctors weigh people in kilograms. I imagine this is the norm.

Makes it easy for NHS staff to do a quick body mass index calculation. Weight in kilos divided by height in metres (squared) or something like that!

 

[Merle Haggard]

If I'm out with cousins who are half Italian (and fluent in the language), woe betide me if I try to order "a panini".

Do they ever travel on Avanti? If so, probably best to say 'Pendos'...

 

[simonw]

We have our bathroom scales set to stones/pounds. To be honest off the top of my head I haven’t a clue as to what my weight is in kilograms.

Makes it easy for NHS staff to do a quick body mass index calculation. Weight in kilos divided by height in metres (squared) or something like that!

Most people younger than me (and that's well over 50% of the population) seem to quote their weight and height in metric.

 

[D6130]

I would ban the articulation of "silent" letters in words having earlier today heard a BBC presenter on an after breakfast programme gushing favourably about someone's "sing-ging" with the word singing being pronounced with a particularly hard 'g'.

Must have been a Scouser.

If I'm out with cousins who are half Italian (and fluent in the language), woe betide me if I try to order "a panini".

Mi sono d'accordo! (I agree!).

Do they ever travel on Avanti? If so, probably best to say 'Pendos'...

No....Pendolini.

 

[DelW]

Do they ever travel on Avanti? If so, probably best to say 'Pendos'...

No....Pendolini.

Fortunately I've never had to cope with that one ... there are enough pitfalls in Italian menus.

 

[Richard Scott]

Makes it easy for NHS staff to do a quick body mass index calculation. Weight in kilos divided by height in metres (squared) or something like that!

Pendant alert but weight can only be measured in Newtons, all the others are units of mass. Sorry, it's one of my irritations!!!