Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

[jfollows]

I get annoyed with brand names that I have no idea how to pronounce (as per those with random Zs etc mentioned above). Not that I ever intend to buy one but no idea whether the watches are hublot or hubloh.

"Abrdn" especially annoys me!

 

[adrock1976]

I would like to nominate ITV to be banned from constantly mucking around with their Hub/ITVX app, as every time they do something to it, I cannot find what I was previously viewing or wanting to view.

Their interface is not very friendly (same as Channel 5). Also, for me to get the main ITV1 shows to come up, the app does not get them to come up with my postcode, therefore I inputted my mum's postcode (West Midlands). This gets the ITV1 shows to appear, but for the regional news it shows London Region.

 

[duncanp]

I get annoyed with brand names that I have no idea how to pronounce (as per those with random Zs etc mentioned above). Not that I ever intend to buy one but no idea whether the watches are hublot or hubloh.

Such as when Standard Life "rebranded" themselves to "ABRDN"

Just what is the point of that?

No doubt some smart **** marketing or brand consultant just out of nappies thought it was cool and trendy, and would lead to people rushing to invest their money with the company.

But in the real world, things like, er, having a good rate of return and a product that meets the investors needs is actually what counts.

 

[BanburyBlue]

One of my Aunts still does that and I have to rein in my annoyance.

Weirdly I use AFAIK and IMO on forums which makes me a hypocrite for disliking text message speak.

Same applies when people use the 3 letter station code.

 

[gg1]

Related to this, businesses that use "text-speak" in their names

I'm actively dissuaded from using any company who does this, it comes across as lazy and unprofessional so makes me question the standard of the goods/services they offer.

 

[yorksrob]

Tesco Easy Cook Rice

‘Stir once and then reduce heat, cover and simmer for 15 minutes or until rice is tender.’

After 15 minutes it’s still rock hard pea shooter material. Until rice is tender takes best part of an hour.

Yes, I've found this with all supposedly "easy cook" rice.

What is actually easy to cook rice is described as "long grain" rice.

Don't get me started on wholemeal rice. That stuff's not fit for the cat's litter tray.

 

[Techniquest]

I've been known to dunk a Snickers or Double Decker into my tea.

Ooh nice. I'm about to do the same with a KitKat. Non-dairy KitKat of course!

 

[GusB]

Don't get me started on wholemeal rice. That stuff's not fit for the cat's litter tray.

There was a period during lockdown when Asda substituted brown rice for my usual stuff. I didn't actually think it was too bad once I'd tried it.

I have bad memories of having brown rice served up in the school canteen; more calories were lost chewing the stuff than were contained in the meal!

 

[Purple Train]

I get annoyed at forum posts that read like a text message or twitter feed with the word u instead of you and unnecessary emojis, doesn't really apply here but it's prevalent on other places I visit.

r u sure abt that

I find it really annoying as well - if you wish to be economical, fine, but make sure people can understand it! You know what you're trying to say, but the recipient is not necessarily a mind-reader...

 

[xotGD]

wholemeal rice

Plenty of fibre - keeps you regular!

 

[AM9]

Yes, I've found this with all supposedly "easy cook" rice.

What is actually easy to cook rice is described as "long grain" rice.

Don't get me started on wholemeal rice. That stuff's not fit for the cat's litter tray.

I'm quite happy with the 2 min., microwave rice packs. Just had a Basmati one, cost about 75p in Waitrose. I usually have Brown Basmati or Whole grain rice, - it's got a bit more fibrous bite and consequently a lot better for good health.
The rice that is normally served with savoury dishes is long grain types like Basmati or Patna. Short grain rice is more often found in sweet dishes like rice pudding.

 

[bspahh]

Plenty of fibre - keeps you regular!

There used to be a column called Daedalus in the journal Nature by David Jones. When GM crops first hit the news, he suggested engineering brown rice so you would get a low dose of nicotine, and be addicted to a high fibre diet.

 

[D821]

Finding out your employer is getting lunch in for everyone - great!
Finding out its sushi - not great.

Underwhelming, cold and slimy, it can get back in the sea.

 

[birchesgreen]

Finding out your employer is getting lunch in for everyone - great!
Finding out its sushi - not great.

Underwhelming, cold and slimy, it can get back in the sea.

Sushi is great when done right, unfortunately much of what is available here isn't great!

 

[yorksrob]

It's not as good as office pizza though !

 

[D821]

Sushi is great when done right, unfortunately much of what is available here isn't great!

I've been told where we get it from us a good place and everyone else seems to enjoy it. I could put up with it now and again, but it's the same place everytime they get food in.

== Doublepost prevention - post automatically merged: 18 Apr 2023 ==

It's not as good as office pizza though !

Indeed! It's frustrating as there is an excellent pizza place within 2minutes walk of the office.

 

[birchesgreen]

It's not as good as office pizza though !

Now pizza for an office treat is something i would ban as i despise pizza, especially from the likes of Dominos.

Give me a good curry anytime, though might not prove that popular in the office afterwards...

 

[dgl]

It's not as good as office pizza though !

Quite, we had Papa Johns a couple of weeks back after a particularly difficult day(and a good selection of about 5 or 6 different pizzas), probably helps that we have a Papa Johns on site and in theory if we buy it during a shift it's 50% off (20% all other times).

 

[61653 HTAFC]

Finding out your employer is getting lunch in for everyone - great!
Finding out its sushi - not great.

Underwhelming, cold and slimy, it can get back in the sea.

I vaguely recall reading/hearing somewhere that the word "sushi" refers to the type of rice used, not specifically anything seafood-related that may or may not be included. The idea that sushi means "raw fish" is a common Anglophone misconception. All this may of course be a misconception on my part, but would mean that "vegetarian sushi" isn't quite as absurd as it seems on paper.

 

[dangie]

…Give me a good curry anytime….

Amuses me when people say they love Indian food. I ask them which rice they have.
Frequent answer is ‘oh I can’t stand rice, I always have chips……’

 

[yorksrob]

Now pizza for an office treat is something i would ban as i despise pizza, especially from the likes of Dominos.

Give me a good curry anytime, though might not prove that popular in the office afterwards...

Oh yes, I'd go for a curry in preference.

Quite, we had Papa Johns a couple of weeks back after a particularly difficult day(and a good selection of about 5 or 6 different pizzas), probably helps that we have a Papa Johns on site and in theory if we buy it during a shift it's 50% off (20% all other times).

Yes, beats anything I could cook.

 

[birchesgreen]

Amuses me when people say they love Indian food. I ask them which rice they have.
Frequent answer is ‘oh I can’t stand rice, I always have chips……’

Thats amusing though i live with an Asian woman so there is no escape from rice.

 

[61653 HTAFC]

On the rice thing, the very concept of "easy cook" rice baffles me- it suggests that there's also "difficult cook" rice, and I'm not sure how complicated boiling some water in a pan could be.

 

[D821]

People who insist on having phone calls in workplace / public toilets. Unless it's a matter of life and death, do they really think other toilet users want to hear it, or the person they are speaking too? The echo must make it obvious to the other caller!

 

[Meerkat]

People who insist on having phone calls in workplace / public toilets. Unless it's a matter of life and death, do they really think other toilet users want to hear it, or the person they are speaking too? The echo must make it obvious to the other caller!

Just flush the chain loads or start acting out a difficult delivery! Or loudly utter "God, it stinks in 'ere!"

 

[Howardh]

Finding out your employer is getting lunch in for everyone - great!
Finding out its sushi - not great.

Underwhelming, cold and slimy, it can get back in the sea.

That's not a very nice way to call your employer!

 

[D821]

That's not a very nice way to call your employer!

Ha, i think I would noticed if they were a fish.
Probably.

 

[Strat-tastic]

I ban people from claiming the proof's in the pudding.
What does that even mean?

 

[Gloster]

I ban people from claiming the proof's in the pudding.
What does that even mean?

It is short for ‘the proof of the pudding is in the eating’. You can have all sorts of theories and ideas, but the proof of whether or not they are good is only to be found if you carry them out and they produce the desired result.

 

[yorksrob]

People going to the drinks machine with more than one cup.

It's legalised queue jumping.