Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

[gg1]

On a related note, people who absolutely refuse to accept they've dialled a wrong number, last (and the worst) one I had was someone who called my mobile repeatedly 5 or 6 years ago. I blocked the number after the first 10 or so times of telling them it was the wrong number but the call blocking app I was using showed they tried dozens of times after that before eventually giving up. I've had the same mobile number since 2000 so it wasn't a case of them trying to get hold of someone who had recently changed their number.

 

[Busaholic]

It is!

Thing is I don't know what to do about it, if someone had mistyped the phone number on the website and google had categorised it we'd have something we could fix. But people are literally typing the company name into google, and taking the number from the second listing (me) rather than the first even though the company names are obvious (and so is the difference).

Some decapitation of said people won't fix it but I might feel less grumpy for it

Look on the bright side - the other company may be getting p*ssed off by all the calls they're getting meant for you.

 

[duncanp]

Another thing which really ****** me off is overseas call centres, or automated call dialling systems, who either don't realise or don't give a **** about the time difference with the UK.

Consequently you get a phone call from "...Microsoft Computer Department...", or an automated phone call from "..Amazon.." saying that they have "...renewed your Prime membership..." in the middle of the night.

It's bad enough getting these calls during the day, but to be woken up at 2am by them is beyond annoying.

 

[Bletchleyite]

Another thing which really ****** me off is overseas call centres, or automated call dialling systems, who either don't realise or don't give a **** about the time difference with the UK.

Consequently you get a phone call from "...Microsoft Computer Department...", or an automated phone call from "..Amazon.." saying that they have "...renewed your Prime membership..." in the middle of the night.

It's bad enough getting these calls during the day, but to be woken up at 2am by them is beyond annoying.

Android and iPhones have the option to "screen" calls overnight if you want to avoid this sort of nonsense. Landlines, I suppose you could unplug the phone but it is a nuisance.

 

[py_megapixel]

Android and iPhones have the option to "screen" calls overnight if you want to avoid this sort of nonsense. Landlines, I suppose you could unplug the phone but it is a nuisance.

Or just turn off/leave in a different room overnight.

I don't think a "silence" button on phones except mobiles has ever been especially common, which is odd, considering there are likely to be plenty of times when people don't want to be disturbed within their own homes/offices, and unplugging it (and possibly forgetting to plug it back in later) would get annoying quickly.

 

[Mcr Warrior]

Landline numbers which were maybe just one mis-dialled digit away from that of some busy local business number, used to be a right pain. A family member often used to get 'phone calls at daft o'clock which were meant for the local private hire / minicab company. Invariably answered "Yes, sir. We'll be with you within 5 minutes!"

 

[Bletchleyite]

Or just turn off/leave in a different room overnight.

I don't think a "silence" button on phones except mobiles has ever been especially common, which is odd, considering there are likely to be plenty of times when people don't want to be disturbed within their own homes/offices, and unplugging it (and possibly forgetting to plug it back in later) would get annoying quickly.

Leaving it "off the hook" used to be the way to do that, but now a very loud siren plays down the earpiece to remind you you've done that so it doesn't really work.

 

[py_megapixel]

Landline numbers which are maybe just one mis-dialled digit away from that of some busy local business number used to be a right pain. A family member often used to get 'phone calls at daft o'clock which were meant for the local private hire / minicab company. Invariably answered "Yes, sir. We'll be with you within 5 minutes!"

I read a story online a while ago about someone with a number one digit different from a Pizza Hut, who got a lot of "wrong number" calls as a result. Apparently they got so fed up of people trying to order food that they started actually pretending to take the orders, for a bit of fun. The proprietors of the Pizza Hut couldn't figure out why so many customers were turning up, adamant that they had telephone orders to collect, while they had no record of them ever ordering anything. When they eventually worked out what was going on, I believe they were quite angry!

Leaving it "off the hook" used to be the way to do that, but now a very loud siren plays down the earpiece to remind you you've done that so it doesn't really work.

That also doesn't work with cordless handsets, which seem to be the dominant design now.

 

[gg1]

Landline numbers which were maybe just one mis-dialled digit away from that of some busy local business number, used to be a right pain. A family member often used to get 'phone calls at daft o'clock which were meant for the local private hire / minicab company. Invariably answered "Yes, sir. We'll be with you within 5 minutes!"

In the 80s my parents used to regularly receive calls for a hotel in Edinburgh, the reason was the number after the dialling code (031 compared to 021) was identical.

 

[duncanp]

I read a story online a while ago about someone with a number one digit different from a Pizza Hut, who got a lot of "wrong number" calls as a result. Apparently they got so fed up of people trying to order food that they started actually pretending to take the orders, for a bit of fun. The proprietors of the Pizza Hut couldn't figure out why so many customers were turning up, adamant that they had telephone orders to collect, while they had no record of them ever ordering anything. When they eventually worked out what was going on, I believe they were quite angry!

At least they weren't one digit different from your local GP surgery.

That would be a living nightmare, with the phone ringing constantly from 08:00 every morning.

But think of the fun you could have with that, dispensing fake medical advice over the phone ("..deep heat is very good for soothing piles Mr Bloggs.."), or pretending to book same day appoinments for everyone who phones.

 

[py_megapixel]

At least they weren't one digit different from your local GP surgery.

That would be a living nightmare, with the phone ringing constantly from 08:00 every morning.

But think of the fun you could have with that, dispensing fake medical advice over the phone ("..deep heat is very good for soothing piles Mr Bloggs.."), or pretending to book same day appoinments for everyone who phones.

Or delegate the task to a computer. Have a text-to-speech synthesiser which announces the usual things for several minutes ("the line is extremely busy at the moment", "please do not be offended if we ask a few questions about your issue to help direct your call to the right person", "if you have a query about repeat prescriptions please contact your pharmacy" and so on) and then just says "You appear to have called the wrong number. Please check the number when dialling in the future." and hangs up.

Not sure I'd actually to do that if I was in that situation though. If you're calling a GP it's probably more urgent than ordering a pizza, and you wouldn't appreciate someone attempting to play a practical joke on your in the process.

If it got that annoying, I'd probably just use a mobile for everything and unplug the landline.

 

[Gloster]

I read a story online a while ago about someone with a number one digit different from a Pizza Hut, who got a lot of "wrong number" calls as a result.

Prince Andrew always did have trouble with ‘phones.

 

[61653 HTAFC]

It is!

Thing is I don't know what to do about it, if someone had mistyped the phone number on the website and google had categorised it we'd have something we could fix. But people are literally typing the company name into google, and taking the number from the second listing (me) rather than the first even though the company names are obvious (and so is the difference).

Some decapitation of said people won't fix it but I might feel less grumpy for it

Often when you Google a business, the first result is a "sponsored link" with the second one being the "real" first result. Many people see the words "sponsored link" and automatically use the second result- thanks largely to that lingering distrust of the internet among those who remember life before the internet. Nine times out of ten this will be the same information as was in the sponsored link- but if you have two businesses with similar names it might not be.

Anyway, all this talk of landlines has made me realise I can't recall the last time I ever used one. I don't even have one in my flat, as free WiFi is provided by the management company.

When it comes to the "I thought maybe you used different names" thing- this does happen more often than you'd think. For example there used to be multiple minicab firms in my area, and if you google "taxis Dewsbury" you'll still get results from multiple firms with different names and numbers...
However almost all of those numbers now redirect to one of the companies, which seems to have acquired most or all of their competitors in the last couple of years.

 

[Gloster]

Those pushchair-style contraptions that are used to carry pets such as dogs and cats. Now I know that some pets have mobility problems due to illness, age or accident, but surely their owners could be parted with them for an hour or so while they go shopping. Anyway, many of the animals do not seem to have any problems: they are just pampered pooches.

 

[BanburyBlue]

It is!

Thing is I don't know what to do about it, if someone had mistyped the phone number on the website and google had categorised it we'd have something we could fix. But people are literally typing the company name into google, and taking the number from the second listing (me) rather than the first even though the company names are obvious (and so is the difference).

Some decapitation of said people won't fix it but I might feel less grumpy for it

BT around here quite a few years ago, mistyped some guys phone number with one of a local restaurant in the telephone directory. Poor old chap was getting 100's of calls a week.

 

[WelshBluebird]

Ignore - misread a post!

 

[dakta]

BT around here quite a few years ago, mistyped some guys phone number with one of a local restaurant in the telephone directory. Poor old chap was getting 100's of calls a week.

That poor fella

 

[dgl]

BT around here quite a few years ago, mistyped some guys phone number with one of a local restaurant in the telephone directory. Poor old chap was getting 100's of calls a week.

"This is not the local Chinese Takeaway, this is a white slimline two-piece telephone with no oriental connections whatsoever!"

 

[Gloster]

People who are so busy nattering to their companions when they are getting on the bus that they fail to hear anything that the driver says to them (“Your card didn’t work.” “That’s not enough money.”) They then seem amazed and confused when the driver has to call them back as they wander off with their pal.

People who indulge their small children by going upstairs, so that the bus has to wait while the child slowly climbs the stairs, they find a seat and install themselves. The process is then repeated in reverse when they get off. As they frequently only go a couple of stops as the brats can’t walk far, they spend more time on the bus when it is at a stand than when it is moving.

People who, when they are sitting on the aisle side of a pair of seats and the person on the window side wants to get off, get up and move towards the front of the bus. The person getting off then has to move towards the back of the the bus to allow the other to sit down again, which usually involves fiddling with their shopping bags until they sit down and let the disembarking passenger past. If they moved towards the back, the disembarking passenger could head straight for the door.

 

[py_megapixel]

Single-door double-decker buses on busy urban routes.

== Doublepost prevention - post automatically merged: 31 May 2022 ==

People who indulge their small children by going upstairs, so that the bus has to wait while the child slowly climbs the stairs, they find a seat and install themselves. The process is then repeated in reverse when they get off. As they frequently only go a couple of stops as the brats can’t walk far, they spend more time on the bus when it is at a stand than when it is moving.

I don't think most drivers round here would bother waiting. Most of them just board all the passengers and then shut the doors and off we go.

 

[Jimini]

I don't think most drivers round here would bother waiting. Most of them just board all the passengers and then shut the doors and off we go.

Same down here. Wouldn't happen inside the M25 -- let them bounce their way to their seat or miss their stop on the way back down

 

[Paul Jones 88]

Alarm clocks that aren't loud enough, over the years I have smashed up three alarm clocks because they failed to wake me up.

 

[duncanp]

Single-door double-decker buses on busy urban routes.

The buses in Birmingham are all single doors at the front, including the double deck routes.

It took a bit of getting used to when I moved up from London.

It doesn't necessarily slow down the entry and exit provided:-

• People wait until everyone has got off before they try to board
• People who are getting off do so as soon as the bus arrives at the stop.

Having a single door means that there is more room inside, with less conflict between wheelchair users, people with buggies, and those with large items of luggage.

What sometimes happens is that people are so engrossed in their phone that they don't realise that the bus has arrived at the stop where they want to get off.

Then people start boarding, and the said phone addict then has to push past them to get off. That is something that should be banned, as it is very annoying.

Another thing that should be banned with regard to buses is people who have a mobile ticket waiting until they are just boarding the bus before they switch on their phone, fiddle around trying to find the App, and then spend more time trying to find the m-ticket. It is the electronic equivalent of someone fiddling around in their wallet or purse to find the right coinage when paying by cash, and it just delays everyone.

If you are waiting at the bus stop, have your ticket ready on your phone so that you can show it to the driver straight away.

 

[43096]

"This is not the local Chinese Takeaway, this is a white slimline two-piece telephone with no oriental connections whatsoever!"

That sounds like something Hyacinth Bucket would say!

 

[Bletchleyite]

It doesn't necessarily slow down the entry and exit provided:-

• People wait until everyone has got off before they try to board

Bit of a contradiction there. Of course it slows it down. The debate is just about whether the downside (revenue loss from people sneaking on at the back) outweighs the benefit.

 

[Madge Wildfire]

• People wait until everyone has got off before they try to board
• People who are getting off do so as soon as the bus arrives at the stop.

The same could be said for trains. When I commuted (mainly by HST) to/from work, at most stations there would be a platform scrum to get as near to the carriage doors as possible. Sometimes it was impossible to open the door because people who wanted to bag the best empty seat for themselves, had not even considered the fact that passengers might want to get off the train first, and were virtually rammed up against the carriage side. I used to just half open the door into someone's stomach and then just stand in the gap until the penny dropped outside.

 

[Peter Mugridge]

Alarm clocks that aren't loud enough, over the years I have smashed up three alarm clocks because they failed to wake me up.

Get a vibrating pillow alarm...?

 

[al78]

Another thing that should be banned with regard to buses is people who have a mobile ticket waiting until they are just boarding the bus before they switch on their phone, fiddle around trying to find the App, and then spend more time trying to find the m-ticket.

Probably the same people that wait to pay for their purchase in a checkout queue and when it is their turn, stand there packing until the cashier tells them the cost, and only after they have meticulously finished packing everything do they start fumbling about in pockets/handbags/whatever looking for their purse/wallet. The lack of even basic thought and planning amongst some people is ridiculous, and I'm sure it is a major contribution to the general slowness I experience in and around my home town.

 

[duncanp]

That sounds like something Hyacinth Bucket would say!

That is exactly what Hyacinth Bucket Bookay said whenever she answered the phone and it was a wrong number.

 

[Strat-tastic]

People from thinking that life is a race