Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

[Skittle]

New Year's Day morning.

Nowhere to get any effing food when you're hungover.

Shame I keep forgetting I'm not cooking for 10 and made enough to feed a small army.

That said, partner is hungover. I'm gutted, can't drink so stuck on cola - how very rock and roll.

Some supermarkets are open though might get scooby snack and lucozade there

 

[yorksrob]

Would have been better to have prepared for today's hunger then. You can't expect businesses to open for a few that didn't.

It would indeed ! Will I ever learn.

Some of the Greggs are open, well they are around Brum anyway.

Fortunately Upper Crust at Victoria is open and doing a roaring trade !

 

[AM9]

Fortunately Upper Crust at Victoria is open and doing a roaring trade !

I that for all those passengers expecting a Southern train to arrive?

 

[yorksrob]

I that for all those passengers expecting a Southern train to arrive?

The Brighton side was eerily quiet !

Another thing i'd ban - flimsy bog roll ticketing.

 

[AM9]

The Brighton side was eerily quiet !

Another thing i'd ban - flimsy bog roll ticketing.

The only place that I've experienced that is on Northern between Sheffield and Doncaster.

 

[yorksrob]

The only place that I've experienced that is on Northern between Sheffield and Doncaster.

Avanti and East Coast seem to be riddled with it.

 

[MattRat]

people in denial about human activity induced global climate change. Unfortunately some people have over egged the pudding by saying things like London will be underwater within ten years, and/or blaming every bit of unusual weather on it. And it doesn't help that every few years it changes it.s name. I remember when it was called 'The Greenhouse Effect'
BUT I have absolutely no doubt it is real and we can't bury our heads in the sand about it.
it also irritates me when some people seem to treat it as a left/right issue.

Over egged is an understatement. They go around preaching their ideas like a cult. Should we try to solve the issue? Yes. But we should do it intelligently with technology like we've done to solve other problems. Not go back to the stone age worshipping nature like it's some kind of god.

Let's start by banning extinction rebellion, so sane and rational people can have their voice heard instead.

 

[py_megapixel]

But we should do it intelligently with technology like we've done to solve other problems. Not go back to the stone age worshipping nature like it's some kind of god.

There is a middle ground between "technology solves everythng" and "back to the stone age", you know...

 

[MattRat]

There is a middle ground between "technology solves everythng" and "back to the stone age", you know...

Humanity's whole gimmick is invention. To deny that is to deny humanity.

Plus, it's mainly the stone age lot that get all the media coverage.

 

[Acey]

The whole Honours system !

 

[py_megapixel]

Humanity's whole gimmick is invention. To deny that is to deny humanity.

That's all very philosophical and vague. The problem of global warming is concrete and exists now.

I do not think we need to go back to pre-industrial times, but I do think people who believe they will get through the next decade or two living exactly the way they always have and mystical "technology" which doesn't exist yet will sort it all out behind the scenes are naïve to the extreme.

That's not to say I am blaming individuals for the mess we're in. Most of the blame can be laid squarely at the doors of the large businesses, who have worked rather hard to convince the population that mass consumerism, mass car ownership, air travel etc. - things which, to anyone with half a brain, are obviously utterly unsustainable on a planet with finite resources - are somehow good things, and have for years lobbied to avoid any regulation that might affect them. But undoing it will still affect people who have become accustomed to it.

 

[MattRat]

That's all very philosophical and vague. The problem of global warming is concrete and exists now.

I do not think we need to go back to pre-industrial times, but I do think people who believe they will get through the next decade or two living exactly the way they always have and mystical "technology" which doesn't exist yet will sort it all out behind the scenes are naïve to the extreme.

I'm not saying just to wait for something to come along. I want to actively encourage development. Get all the world's greatest minds together, and have them work on solving our problems via the creation of new inventions. Maybe even get them to create an AI to help them.

 

[yorksrob]

I'd been those stupid little ketchup sachets that only contain about a teaspoon full of sauce.

What's the point of them ?

 

[duncanp]

I'd been those stupid little ketchup sachets that only contain about a teaspoon full of sauce.

What's the point of them ?

And are so very difficult to open, so that only a minute amount of sauce actually goes on the food.

 

[PeterY]

The Brighton side was eerily quiet !

Another thing i'd ban - flimsy bog roll ticketing.

I'd also like to ban bog roll tickets. They just seen to get crumpled up in my wallet.

 

[yorksrob]

And are so very difficult to open, so that only a minute amount of sauce actually goes on the food.

Yes, they must waste more than they provide to the food !

I'd also like to ban bog roll tickets. They just seen to get crumpled up in my wallet.

Glad it's not just me !

 

[duncanp]

I would like to ban You Tube videos from breaking into adverts in the middle of the video without warning.

I was watching one today entitled "Relaxing Music, Stress Relief, Calm Your Mind" and about 10 minutes into the video, without any warning, there appeared an advert for some silly file sharing App.

Didn't do much for stress relief and calming my mind.

 

[PeterY]

I'd been those stupid little ketchup sachets that only contain about a teaspoon full of sauce.

What's the point of them ?

That's if you can open them, especially if your hands are a bit greasy.

If I go out for a meal with my friend, she now carries a small pair of make up scissors, so she can open the packets and she needs at least 6 sachets.

Yes they're a waste of time.

 

[Cowley]

I'm not saying just to wait for something to come along. I want to actively encourage development. Get all the world's greatest minds together, and have them work on solving our problems via the creation of new inventions. Maybe even get them to create an AI to help them.

I’m not going to start deleting things but…
The title of this thread is:

Comedic "things you would ban" (i.e. minor things that annoy you in a lighthearted way)​

‘Lighthearted’

 

[dgl]

Dick van Dyke’s Cockney accent was in a category of its own. He apologised a few years ago.

I understand he even wondered why he was cast, and even better supposedly his voice coach for the film was an Irishman!
Later on he suposedly got asked to do another cockney role and politely declined.

New Year's Day morning.

Nowhere to get any effing food when you're hungover.

Wetherspoons in Bridport was open (after finding out that Dorchester McDonalds were not), felt a bit wierd at ~8:00 this morning hearing people who obviously had been out for a bit ordering shots! We luckily were in a quiet room so were somewhat insulated from those who were still partying!
I really can't understand the need to be serving drinks before lunch at least, so that is one thing I would ban.

And one last thing, people who claim that cars were so much more reliable before they had computers in them, not really as not only do computers allow cars to be run as optimally as possible they can also (in certain situations) step in to stop damage from happening or at least lessen it, plus being able to hook up a cheap device that can give you at least some idea of what has gone wrong is really useful.

 

[yorksrob]

I understand he even wondered why he was cast, and even better supposedly his voice coach for the film was an Irishman!
Later on he suposedly got asked to do another cockney role and politely declined.

Wetherspoons in Bridport was open (after finding out that Dorchester McDonalds were not), felt a bit wierd at ~8:00 this morning hearing people who obviously had been out for a bit ordering shots! We luckily were in a quiet room so were somewhat insulated from those who were still partying!
I really can't understand the need to be serving drinks before lunch at least, so that is one thing I would ban.

And one last thing, people who claim that cars were so much more reliable before they had computers in them, not really as not only do computers allow cars to be run as optimally as possible they can also (in certain situations) step in to stop damage from happening or at least lessen it, plus being able to hook up a cheap device that can give you at least some idea of what has gone wrong is really useful.

Goodness, I certainly couldn't have managed any shots at eight this morning !

 

[Bevan Price]

I'm not saying just to wait for something to come along. I want to actively encourage development. Get all the world's greatest minds together, and have them work on solving our problems via the creation of new inventions. Maybe even get them to create an AI to help them.

Yes - but remember that sort of expert also created A-bombs and H-bombs. Something that it would have been better not to invent.

 

[Techniquest]

Goodness, I certainly couldn't have managed any shots at eight this morning !

Sounds like someone got a bit brickfaced the other night I sympathise with your food situation you mentioned though, I had similar issues a few years ago after finishing a night shift. Wanted to see in the new year with a couple of beers, but not even Tesco Express was open at that time. I ended up settling for an Irish coffee set I'd been given for Christmas, not what I wanted but much like your food situation I should have planned ahead!

 

[yorksrob]

Sounds like someone got a bit brickfaced the other night

This is true, but I wouldn't really be able to manage shots at eight in the morning on a normal day either !

Well, maybe a Bloody Mary

 

[Techniquest]

This is true, but I wouldn't really be able to manage shots at eight in the morning on a normal day either !

Well, maybe a Bloody Mary

I once had a can of Stella, many years ago, on the 07xx from Hereford going north, and that was weird Shots, ooh no I was never a fan of them really, I'd end up succumbing to peer pressure and would have some on a big night out, they wouldn't be my first choice though!

I saw the New Year in much later on with a coffee, and darn I've just remembered I have no coffee for the morning!

 

[AM9]

I once had a can of Stella, many years ago, on the 07xx from Hereford going north, and that was weird Shots, ooh no I was never a fan of them really, I'd end up succumbing to peer pressure and would have some on a big night out, they wouldn't be my first choice though!

I saw the New Year in much later on with a coffee, and darn I've just remembered I have no coffee for the morning!

Way back in the early '70s when I travelled from Colchester to work by train, Saturdays gave me the opportunity to ride on the 06:42 as far as Shenfield on a class 309. The trains were lighly loaded as far as Chelmsford so I travelled in the Buffet Car. There were a couple of regulars who had breakfast: - a bowl of corn flakes and a can of beer.

Us 'normals' just couldn't understand how they could enjoy that unless they had a serious alcohol problem!

 

[D821]

A pint of Guiness with a full English goes well. I should point out that I've done this once before a friend's wedding and it's not a regular thing!

 

[Gloster]

I don’t think that, even at my most dissolute, I would have had alcohol for breakfast, although on occasions I have not finished the night’s carousing at breakfast time. However, I am old enough to remember places in rural France where you cleaned your teeth in cheap plonk as the water was non potable.

 

[Meerkat]

Don't the Germans have some kind of fizzy wine for breakfast?

Full English and a pint of Guinness at the airport is standard practice for the dawn flights out for stag dos and other weekends away!

 

[yorksrob]

Apologies if I've said this before, but hand dryers on trains. They don't work and are an excuse not to provide paper towels.

Also, I would ban plumbing train wash basins into the toilet retention tank. These should empty onto the track to provide more capacity in the retention tank for human waste.