COVID-19 and the lockdown effects on mental health.

[Starmill]

One thing nobody who actually cared about people would do would be to just pick up "mental health" as a reason for wanting restrictions to be reduced.

The fact is that healthcare for the causes of suicide are very poor in this country. Some people are able to access literally no support whatsoever until they have actually attempted suicide.

It's important that people don't misrepresent physically being permitted to leave the house as some from of healthcare. Being trapped indoors will negatively effect on both physical and mental health, without doubt. There is a symbiotic link between the two, with improvements to one yielding improvements to the other. But nobody should be making out like there's adequate support for people's mental health out there if only the lockdown were lifted any more than should be dismissing the negative effects of the 'lockdown'.

Large numbers of people - our collective friends and family - kill themselves every year, and have done for some time. Until the reaction to that from the government or wider society changes to something other than a collective shrug the problem will not go away, lockdown or otherwise. If we didn't allow ourselves to get into such a mess as this in the first place, that would significantly increase our capacity to manage difficult exogenous shocks that might cause us to have to remain isolated for long periods of time, such as pandemics.

 

[Cowley]

This is a subject that’s been coming up frequently on here and I was surprised to look through the various threads and find that there wasn’t a specific one discussing what this has meant for those that have mental health issues or work in that field etc.
So we’ve started this one with the opening post by @Starmill which was split from a different thread.

 

[LowLevel]

Mum's plea after son takes his own life under lockdown

Mum has sent out heartfelt message

www.leicestermercury.co.uk

A heartbroken mother has paid tribute to her son ,and made a plea to others, after her son took his own life while under lockdown at university.

Ben Brown, 22, was an architectural engineering student at Loughborough University, and died in the early hours of Monday morning (April 27).

He took his life after writing a letter to his mum explaining that he struggled mentally 'when he wasn't on the go'.

His mum, Helen Hartery-Brown, 54, has sent out a heartfelt message to those who might be struggling to speak out that help is available, reports GloucestershireLive.

Helen said how Ben, who also had attended Welbeck College to do his A-Levels, had been living with university housemates during lockdown and communicating with his family.

It is very relevant. This, from the brief account given in the article, perfectly normal young man apparently couldn't manage the lockdown conditions any further, in his university town away from home, and in a very sad turn of events took his own life on Monday, I believe having been struck by one of our trains.

It's worth remembering that the human mind is not a simple thing and while my social media is full of angry people banging tables ranting about staying at home, not everyone seems able to cope with that.

I've had some horrible black days of late but happily I've got my partner, friends and famlly around me to lift my mood. Others don't have that support network around them, as I believe @yorkie has been at pains to point out - there will be a human cost to this course of action as well as an economic one and sadly a second body count to reflect upon when we try and recover.

 

[Bletchleyite]

I've had some horrible black days of late but happily I've got my partner, friends and famlly around me to lift my mood. Others don't have that support network around them, as I believe @yorkie has been at pains to point out - there will be a human cost to this course of action as well as an economic one and sadly a second body count to reflect upon when we try and recover.

I'm on my own, and it's in many ways been a nice rest. But there are people who thrive on social contact all the time, and they are the sort of people in this sort of position .

That said, I'm very conscious that had we banned outdoor exercise like Spain and Italy did I would have been on a massive downer and may even have been at risk. I'm very glad that the UK took a more sensible attitude to this.

 

[Ianno87]

I'm on my own, and it's in many ways been a nice rest. But there are people who thrive on social contact all the time, and they are the sort of people in this sort of position .

That said, I'm very conscious that had we banned outdoor exercise like Spain and Italy did I would have been on a massive downer and may even have been at risk. I'm very glad that the UK took a more sensible attitude to this.

I dread to think how parents in those countries coped for weeks on end without being able to take kids out of the house. Must've been horrendous.

For us, it's our only remote hope of keeping one of ours in a half decent sleeping routine, by pushing him in his pram to settle him for an afternoon nap.

 

[yorkie]

I dread to think how parents in those countries coped for weeks on end without being able to take kids out of the house. Must've been horrendous.

Spain and Italy, among other things, have effectively committed mass child abuse. (@Bletchleyite was the first to point this out, and he is absolutely right).

Even with our more lenient restrictions, I know some youngsters who are really struggling, and that includes kids who were really happy and had no previous mental health issues whatsoever. I feel bad for youngsters as the biggest risks for (the vast majority of) them right now are not the virus itself but all the other stuff such as the impact of the measures to reduce its spread.

 

[Mojo]

Spain and Italy, among other things, have effectively committed mass child abuse. (@Bletchleyite was the first to point this out, and he is absolutely right).

Even with our more lenient restrictions, I know some youngsters who are really struggling, and that includes kids who were really happy and had no previous mental health issues whatsoever. I feel bad for youngsters as the biggest risks for (the vast majority of) them right now are not the virus itself but all the other stuff such as the impact of the measures to reduce its spread.

More worrying is that 70% of people in our country according to a recent Ipsos Mori poll oppose the reopening the economy until the virus is fully contained, making the UK the most illiberal country of the 14 countries polled (Australia, Canada, France, Germany, Italy, Japan, Russia, UK, USA, China, India, Brazil, Mexico & Spain were the polled countries. I constantly am hearing people complaining about how loose and relaxed the restrictions are, and criticising the government for not being strict enough.

I think our response to date in regards to the lockdown has just been right. Supermarkets and other shops can continue to trade non-essentials, and DIY shops have mostly remained open. It's all very well people criticising those who went to DIY shops the other week, but at least it's given people something to do, and in any case how would you feel if you had a leaking pipe or a half finished job at home that you were unable to finish due to damage to your equipment?

 

[Ianno87]

Spain and Italy, among other things, have effectively committed mass child abuse. (@Bletchleyite was the first to point this out, and he is absolutely right).

Even with our more lenient restrictions, I know some youngsters who are really struggling, and that includes kids who were really happy and had no previous mental health issues whatsoever. I feel bad for youngsters as the biggest risks for (the vast majority of) them right now are not the virus itself but all the other stuff such as the impact of the measures to reduce its spread.

My 3 y/o starts school in September, and his progress through Nursery to be 'school ready' has been stopped in its tracks, and I'm now concerned he might struggle to settle in to school life.

Even his potty training, which we'd just cracked (after much perseverance) before this all blew up, has gone backwards slightly with at least one accident most days. Based on the discussion my wife has on various online chats, this is far from an unusual experience.

 

[Ianno87]

More worrying is that 70% of people in our country according to a recent Ipsos Mori poll oppose the reopening the economy until the virus is fully contained, making the UK the most illiberal country of the 14 countries polled (Australia, Canada, France, Germany, Italy, Japan, Russia, UK, USA, China, India, Brazil, Mexico & Spain were the polled countries. I constantly am hearing people complaining about how loose and relaxed the restrictions are, and criticising the government for not being strict enough.

I think our response to date in regards to the lockdown has just been right. Supermarkets and other shops can continue to trade non-essentials, and DIY shops have mostly remained open. It's all very well people criticising those who went to DIY shops the other week, but at least it's given people something to do, and in any case how would you feel if you had a leaking pipe or a half finished job at home that you were unable to finish due to damage to your equipment?

I'll shout out to the young couple I saw leaving the local retail park yesterday with nothing but a trolley* full of garden plants. How that is "essential" is beyond me.

It pisses me off royally how much my kids development is being held back whilst my wife and are running ourselves into the ground most days to beat this virus, whilst others are taking such liberties with what is "essential" and prolonging these measures being necessary

*Stolen off site and taking it home with them, naturally

 

[yorkie]

I think that getting into the definition of "essential" is off-topic for this thread but I'll just say that really the wrong word was used. However I cannot think of a better word. It was more a case of what was permitted, but they couldn't really quite say that. The use of the term "essential" has caused all sorts of pointless debates in my opinion.

 

[Bletchleyite]

I think that getting into the definition of "essential" is off-topic for this thread but I'll just say that really the wrong word was used. However I cannot think of a better word. It was more a case of what was permitted, but they couldn't really quite say that. The use of the term "essential" has caused all sorts of pointless debates in my opinion.

I agree that it was not sensible to have it. In practice, just closing the shops that weren't seen as essential was better, with the principle being that if it's open you can go there. After all, the chippy isn't essential because you can eat bread and jam. You just get onto absurd arguments that way.

If they didn't want certain things to be sold, they should have just banned the sale of those specific items.

Moving back on topic, that's where things like plants, paint and stuff kicks in. A decent DIY project (ideally not one involving power tools) is a good way to keep yourself occupied if you're bored.

 

[takno]

I'm on my own, and it's in many ways been a nice rest. But there are people who thrive on social contact all the time, and they are the sort of people in this sort of position .

I'm not on my own, as I have a flatmate who I've got on very well with for years. Turns out there's quite a difference between seeing someone for a couple of hours in the evening and seeing them all day every day. Dealing with somebody's various habits when you're trying to get a full week's work done at the kitchen table isn't recipe for domestic bliss. I know some other people who basically live with random people they don't know or like at all and are basically confined to a single room. All the joy of doing a spot of DIY is lost to these people, since they are largely forbidden from doing repairs or improvements, and even video calls with the wider social network are made more difficult by the necessity to share bandwidth with others, and not having the privacy to make the calls for hours on end.

It's important that the government has recognised the risk of domestic abuse and for people with recognised mental health issues, but I don't think they've really paid attention to the sheer number of people whose normal life outside of sleep is lived outside of their homes, and who accordingly just don't have a home that's suitable for being in all the time.

 

[Bletchleyite]

I'm not on my own, as I have a flatmate who I've got on very well with for years. Turns out there's quite a difference between seeing someone for a couple of hours in the evening and seeing them all day every day. Dealing with somebody's various habits when you're trying to get a full week's work done at the kitchen table isn't recipe for domestic bliss. I know some other people who basically live with random people they don't know or like at all and are basically confined to a single room. All the joy of doing a spot of DIY is lost to these people, since they are largely forbidden from doing repairs or improvements, and even video calls with the wider social network are made more difficult by the necessity to share bandwidth with others, and not having the privacy to make the calls for hours on end.

True. I did have a housemate who got his own flat and moved in on August bank holiday. On balance I'm glad he's not living here now because we'd be tripping over each other, but it would be nice to be able to merge our two households in a NZ style "bubble" to be able to visit each other for dinner etc, at the expense of a slightly higher risk of having to self-isolate (particularly as he is working part-time in a hospital at present).

One interesting thing I've noticed is that my next door neighbour who had split from his wife/fiancee/girlfriend/whatever-she-was appears to have moved back in with her, he's just popping back to collect post. I hope that's going well for them, before they split they did argue quite a lot.

 

[GRALISTAIR]

My wife is struggling and constantly in tears- hope some restrictions are lifted soon.

 

[Esker-pades]

My mental health has been absolutely pants during the lockdown, but then it's been absolutely pants for most of the past 4/5 years, so I'm not sure that much can be attributed to the current situation. Lows have probably been made harder to recover from though.

The hardest thing is a lack of physical affection. The phrase is 'touch-starved'. I can't give my friends the massive hugs I'd like to (for example). I'm getting more chatting time with people than usual, but the complete lack of physical contact is getting to me.

However, I'm a person who really needs alone time. I'm glad I'm not isolating with a person who I don't really know, or my family. If very small gatherings of ~2 people were allowed, I'd be really happy. However, I wouldn't be comfortable if the government did it now (currently, I think the best thing is to wait for another 3 week cycle).

 

[bramling]

Spain and Italy, among other things, have effectively committed mass child abuse. (@Bletchleyite was the first to point this out, and he is absolutely right).

Even with our more lenient restrictions, I know some youngsters who are really struggling, and that includes kids who were really happy and had no previous mental health issues whatsoever. I feel bad for youngsters as the biggest risks for (the vast majority of) them right now are not the virus itself but all the other stuff such as the impact of the measures to reduce its spread.

There’s something seriously wrong if a few weeks of pretty weak lockdown is having such a major effect on people.

Today we have the world inside our houses in the form of the internet, something we wouldn’t have had 25 years ago, as well as good communications in the form of mobile phones, which again pretty much everyone has nowadays, when 25 years ago it would have been one landline per household (quite probably with calls charged per minute), no social media and certainly nothing like FaceTime. There’s more TV channels than ever now, again 25 years ago for most people it would have been four channels, and the only way to get stuff on demand would be to tape it and watch later.

Where have we gone so wrong?

I get that this whole situation is pants. It’s pants for everyone in different ways. But being stuck at home with plenty of things to keep positively occupied with *shouldn’t* be the end of the world it’s being made out to be.

I’m increasingly coming to the conclusion that it is best just to get everyone back to work. In my area at least the lockdown is non existent, and what’s the point in spending billions of pounds protecting people to collectively fail to derive the maximum value from that expenditure?

 

[nedchester]

There’s something seriously wrong if a few weeks of pretty weak lockdown is having such a major effect on people.

Today we have the world inside our houses in the form of the internet, something we wouldn’t have had 25 years ago, as well as good communications in the form of mobile phones, which again pretty much everyone has nowadays, when 25 years ago it would have been one landline per household (quite probably with calls charged per minute), no social media and certainly nothing like FaceTime. There’s more TV channels than ever now, again 25 years ago for most people it would have been four channels, and the only way to get stuff on demand would be to tape it and watch later.

Where have we gone so wrong?

I get that this whole situation is pants. It’s pants for everyone in different ways. But being stuck at home with plenty of things to keep positively occupied with *shouldn’t* be the end of the world it’s being made out to be.

I’m increasingly coming to the conclusion that it is best just to get everyone back to work. In my area at least the lockdown is non existent, and what’s the point in spending billions of pounds protecting people to collectively fail to derive the maximum value from that expenditure?

I suggest that you have little understand of what many people especially the young need.

Despite what you might think about youngsters being glued to their screens all the time many like real social interaction with their friends. My son should have been working his backside off for his A Levels now. He’d psyched himself up for the task ahead and was in control. Now he has a period of uncertainty until August not knowing what will happen. The rug has been pulled from under his feet. Fortunately he seems to be coping quite well.
Yesterday we went on a long bike ride together and he was telling me how some of his friends were coping badly from a mental health point of view. They can’t get out of the house, they can’t go and play football. If they had a job that’s been taken away along with the income.
If this doesn’t end soon we are going to have a bigger crisis than the disease itself and longer term the effects will go on many years into the future as opportunities are destroyed all because “we had to save the lives of old people” - that’s not my words but the thinking amongst some younger ones.

As for me in my fifties it is starting to get to me. The 200 channels of TV are rubbish and I can’t go out on the train, see friends, go to the pub, have a meal out etc.I feel I am just “existing”....I can put up with it for about a month or so longer. I’m sure I’m not the only one.

 

[Jayden99]

There’s something seriously wrong if a few weeks of pretty weak lockdown is having such a major effect on people.

Today we have the world inside our houses in the form of the internet, something we wouldn’t have had 25 years ago, as well as good communications in the form of mobile phones, which again pretty much everyone has nowadays, when 25 years ago it would have been one landline per household (quite probably with calls charged per minute), no social media and certainly nothing like FaceTime. There’s more TV channels than ever now, again 25 years ago for most people it would have been four channels, and the only way to get stuff on demand would be to tape it and watch later.

Where have we gone so wrong?

I get that this whole situation is pants. It’s pants for everyone in different ways. But being stuck at home with plenty of things to keep positively occupied with *shouldn’t* be the end of the world it’s being made out to be.

I’m increasingly coming to the conclusion that it is best just to get everyone back to work. In my area at least the lockdown is non existent, and what’s the point in spending billions of pounds protecting people to collectively fail to derive the maximum value from that expenditure?

With all due respect, this does seem to be a very I'm alright Jack attitude. Just because you can cope with the lockdown definitely doesn't mean that everyone can. Things like FaceTime are an amazing resource but they can't replace the "real thing". I live alone on the other side of the country to most if my family and friends and I've found that my mental health has started to take some wobbles over the last few weeks after a good few years of making really good progress from a really low low. Just try and extend a tiny bit of compassion to others, this is a big sacrifice

 

[Adam Williams]

Despite what you might think about youngsters being glued to their screens all the time many like real social interaction with their friends. My son should have been working his backside off for his A Levels now. He’d psyched himself up for the task ahead and was in control. Now he has a period of uncertainty until August not knowing what will happen.

I really feel for current sixth form students who've been faced with all this uncertainty through no fault of their own. Even under normal circumstances they're under a lot of stress (too much if you ask me, following linearisation of qualifications) to get the grades required for their university offer.

And now? They have no control over the predicted grades they'll be issued, no idea how universities will handle places for the next academic year (or even what state campuses will be in then) and no idea how teaching might be impacted.

Disclaimer: views my own; not of any organisation I may perform work for.

 

[bramling]

I suggest that you have little understand of what many people especially the young need.

Despite what you might think about youngsters being glued to their screens all the time many like real social interaction with their friends. My son should have been working his backside off for his A Levels now. He’d psyched himself up for the task ahead and was in control. Now he has a period of uncertainty until August not knowing what will happen. The rug has been pulled from under his feet. Fortunately he seems to be coping quite well.
Yesterday we went on a long bike ride together and he was telling me how some of his friends were coping badly from a mental health point of view. They can’t get out of the house, they can’t go and play football. If they had a job that’s been taken away along with the income.
If this doesn’t end soon we are going to have a bigger crisis than the disease itself and longer term the effects will go on many years into the future as opportunities are destroyed all because “we had to save the lives of old people” - that’s not my words but the thinking amongst some younger ones.

As for me in my fifties it is starting to get to me. The 200 channels of TV are rubbish and I can’t go out on the train, see friends, go to the pub, have a meal out etc.I feel I am just “existing”....I can put up with it for about a month or so longer. I’m sure I’m not the only one.

I do think the point about exams is well made. I’d have been pretty dispirited to have got to the point of being within touching distance of exams and then, as you say, having had the rug pulled out from underneath. I’d certainly have been infuriated at any suggestion of teachers making up grades or going off a mock exam. I don’t really feel enough has been done to cater for this group.

It really isn’t as simplistic as “saving the lives of old people” though, we all need to get away from that mentality (and yes I’m sure we’ve all been guilty of slipping into it at times). If some of the modelling turned out to be even half true then we could well have seen an NHS which would have had no option but to essentially turn people away due to lack of capacity, and that would have impacted on everyone not least young people.

Ditto there’s been some quite unpleasant stuff floating around that “most of these people would have died anyway” or “in most cases they had underlying health conditions” - both these statements overlook the fact that many of the people who have or would have died would quite probably have lived fulfilling lives for some time. In that sense I really can’t get away from the fact that missing out on a football match really is a small cost to bear.

 

[nedchester]

I do think the point about exams is well made. I’d have been pretty dispirited to have got to the point of being within touching distance of exams and then, as you say, having had the rug pulled out from underneath. I’d certainly have been infuriated at any suggestion of teachers making up grades or going off a mock exam. I don’t really feel enough has been done to cater for this group.

Indeed. In my own son's case he's applied for a dentistry course, highly competitive and put months of effort (placements, extra tests etc) into this starting 12 months ago. I am fairly sure he would have got the grades (and is predicted so) but he now has no control over matters.

It really isn’t as simplistic as “saving the lives of old people” though, we all need to get away from that mentality (and yes I’m sure we’ve all been guilty of slipping into it at times). If some of the modelling turned out to be even half true then we could well have seen an NHS which would have had no option but to essentially turn people away due to lack of capacity, and that would have impacted on everyone not least young people.

Ditto there’s been some quite unpleasant stuff floating around that “most of these people would have died anyway” or “in most cases they had underlying health conditions” - both these statements overlook the fact that many of the people who have or would have died would quite probably have lived fulfilling lives for some time. In that sense I really can’t get away from the fact that missing out on a football match really is a small cost to bear.

The fact is that the vast majority of those that do die from this awful disease ARE elderly or have an existing health condition (often older people). Yes a few highly publicised cases of deaths out of those categories but most (over 99%) of healthy younger people (under 60) get over this. It is true to say that if we let the disease run rampant then the NHS could well be overrun but I suspect many think that these vulnerable ones are perhaps the ones to be isolated, rather than the younger ones who have lives to lead.

When you are young small changes are a big deal and taking away many leisure things will lead to both stress and resentment. If it affects their longer term life chances in terms of employment, taxes they have to pay, pensions / retirement ages then we could have a whole generation resentful of the events of Spring/Summer 2020. This may seem to be straying away from the mental health issue but they are linked.

 

[alxndr]

In some regards I'm doing well as my life hasn't changed that much. I don't have any local friends or family, I'm still working, and I'm a distance learning student. The only difference is less socialising at work (no chatting in the van etc) and not going climbing, but even then it's still better than when I was recovering from surgery for 8 weeks as I couldn't even get out the house to go to work. The changes to the norm is causing me some hassle though, for example, the changes in shops has thrown off my "script" for how to do that and meant that I couldn't summon the energy to tackle shopping until I was completely out of food and 6lbs underweight from trying to put it off as long as I could. It has made me realise the degree of difficulty that I have with changes to routine might be a problem that I shouldn't keep ignoring though, and this may end up being the catalyst to doing something about it (when all this is over of course).

I'm very aware that I'm one of the lucky ones though. I have one friend who was already having a rough time and finding it even harder being alone with nothing but their own thoughts and even less availability of mental health support. In normal circumstances I'd be considering a trip to check in on them and be a distraction, but that's not an option right now. Another friend has a flatmate who is extremely anxious about the whole situation and won't allow him to leave at all unless it's an emergency. That includes for food shopping, even though all he has now is some rice.

 

[HH]

At the age that people go to University, my grandfather was fighting in WW1; in the trenches at Ypres. At the same age, my father was fighting in Burma, the same as Captain Tom (but my father was only a Sergeant, not coming from a privileged background - he was a railway porter back in blighty).

They weren't great experiences. Neither of them liked talking about their wars. I'm sure my grandfather (who suffered attacks with Mustard Gas and died aged 64 of lung cancer) must have had some mental issues to overcome. But you never would have seen it; he was a lovely man, who never had a bad word to say about anyone.

One left school at 10 (the official age at the start of the 20th century) and the other at 14, so there was no chance at all for the non-privileged to go to University. Thanks to their efforts, I went to University, and I'm very glad for all the privileges that their sacrifices bought me.

tempora mutantur, nos et mutamur in illis

 

[AnthonyRail]

Completely struggling to manage autism and lockdown.

Even tho i still have to go to work eachday. Its unbearable having to remain at home until time to leave for work then home after.

Its not the life i want. Hope lockdown ends soon but its going to be a while.

 

[scotrail158713]

With all due respect, this does seem to be a very I'm alright Jack attitude. Just because you can cope with the lockdown definitely doesn't mean that everyone can. Things like FaceTime are an amazing resource but they can't replace the "real thing". I live alone on the other side of the country to most if my family and friends and I've found that my mental health has started to take some wobbles over the last few weeks after a good few years of making really good progress from a really low low. Just try and extend a tiny bit of compassion to others, this is a big sacrifice

Agreed. I’m coping fine with the lockdown, so I’m having to stop myself from thinking that therefore everyone else should be fine as well. To put it bluntly, it’s quite a selfish viewpoint IMO.

Completely struggling to manage autism and lockdown.

Even tho i still have to go to work eachday. Its unbearable having to remain at home until time to leave for work then home after.

Its not the life i want. Hope lockdown ends soon but its going to be a while.

If you want to find the positives in it then you could say it’s positive that you’re still able to get out to go to work. I find trying to find positives in challenging times helps me through them.

 

[bramling]

Indeed. In my own son's case he's applied for a dentistry course, highly competitive and put months of effort (placements, extra tests etc) into this starting 12 months ago. I am fairly sure he would have got the grades (and is predicted so) but he now has no control over matters.



The fact is that the vast majority of those that do die from this awful disease ARE elderly or have an existing health condition (often older people). Yes a few highly publicised cases of deaths out of those categories but most (over 99%) of healthy younger people (under 60) get over this. It is true to say that if we let the disease run rampant then the NHS could well be overrun but I suspect many think that these vulnerable ones are perhaps the ones to be isolated, rather than the younger ones who have lives to lead.

When you are young small changes are a big deal and taking away many leisure things will lead to both stress and resentment. If it affects their longer term life chances in terms of employment, taxes they have to pay, pensions / retirement ages then we could have a whole generation resentful of the events of Spring/Summer 2020. This may seem to be straying away from the mental health issue but they are linked.

It’s a very difficult circle to square, as one could quite justifiably be resentful about the schools / exams situation, but there’s a quite reasonable case to say we simply could not viably ask teachers to go to work in a potentially dangerous environment. To where do people direct any resentment? Old people for being higher risk? Obese people for being higher risk? China for seemingly mutating the virus and possibly hushing it up? People going on ski trips and bringing it back from Italy? The WHO? The list of possibilities is endless, and I don’t think any of it is really helpful, nor is turning into a young versus old warfare as it’s *much* more nuanced than that.

Likewise it really isn’t just as simple as cooping up the over-70s until a vaccine hopefully emerges. At my work we have many people in 50s and 60s off due to shielding, and some as young as their 20s. Again the “it’s only a tiny minority of pensioners at risk” doesn’t quite stand up to scrutiny.

 

[sheff1]

I'll shout out to the young couple I saw leaving the local retail park yesterday with nothing but a trolley* full of garden plants. How that is "essential" is beyond me.

It pisses me off royally how much my kids development is being held back whilst my wife and are running ourselves into the ground most days to beat this virus, whilst others are taking such liberties with what is "essential" and prolonging these measures being necessary

Maybe the young couple are using gardening to help them avoid/alleviate the mental health issues that this thread is supposed to be about. The benefits of gardening in reducing mental health problems have been well documented in various studies.

The fact that purchasing plants etc is 100% allowed has been covered extensivley on other, more appropriate, threads.

 

[Cowley]

I’m currently watching one of my stepdaughters relationship falling apart. She’s 21 and has recently had an operation which she’s recovering from but her boyfriend is unable to visit her due to the lockdown rules.
This has put a strain on their relationship that they’d probably be able to deal with if they were able to see each other and perhaps go for walk on a beach/go out for a meal together/spend some time socialising etc...
She’ll be alright but it’s just one of those unfortunate scenarios that have come up in all of this.

 

[LowLevel]

At the age that people go to University, my grandfather was fighting in WW1; in the trenches at Ypres. At the same age, my father was fighting in Burma, the same as Captain Tom (but my father was only a Sergeant, not coming from a privileged background - he was a railway porter back in blighty).

They weren't great experiences. Neither of them liked talking about their wars. I'm sure my grandfather (who suffered attacks with Mustard Gas and died aged 64 of lung cancer) must have had some mental issues to overcome. But you never would have seen it; he was a lovely man, who never had a bad word to say about anyone.

One left school at 10 (the official age at the start of the 20th century) and the other at 14, so there was no chance at all for the non-privileged to go to University. Thanks to their efforts, I went to University, and I'm very glad for all the privileges that their sacrifices bought me.

tempora mutantur, nos et mutamur in illis

The times haven't changed in the slightest though have they, there have always been people who can seemingly manage anything thrown at them and others who cannot, even as a result of seemingly trivial things. Take the lad in the link I posted. It seems he had long had troubling thoughts but had developed a successful coping mechanism, or at least one that papered the cracks sufficiently to get by. The lockdown interrupted those coping mechanisms and the result was, unfortunately, fatal. Maybe it would have happened in the end anyway or maybe he would have sought assistance, there isn't any way of telling now.

In my own world my way of coping with problems (and some of the ones I've had to deal with in my time are also quite nasty) has always been to have a good open session with my mates in the pub and get everything out in the open, toss it over and put it to bed. Having been denied that of late my mood has been far blacker than normal on some days, though nothing like suicidal - just thoroughly fed up.

 

[al78]

The hardest thing is a lack of physical affection. The phrase is 'touch-starved'. I can't give my friends the massive hugs I'd like to (for example). I'm getting more chatting time with people than usual, but the complete lack of physical contact is getting to me.

I can completely relate to this. I live alone, I am quite a tactile person and I have several female friends who I used to meet and greet with a hug. I highly value female affection, it is a great mood lifter, but it has been taken away from me, and there is no way of knowing when I can enjoy it again.

I can still cultivate my allotment, one source of fresh air and exercise that I can still enjoy.