Rules of the Railway

[12CSVT]

Byelaw no. 39999. Any group of chavs who persist on playing rap music at full volume on their phones, despite being warned about it by the guard or any passengers beforehand, will be thrown off the train at the next stop regardless of their age.

Isn't that already covered in the byelaws ? - Causing a nuisance to other passengers.

Ideally, if they've already been warned, the BTP should be waiting for them.

 

[hairyhandedfool]

If you had the authority, what new rules would you introduce to rail passengers?....

I'd ban those stupid small trolley case things (Click here for an example). I think wheels on large and heavy luggage is a good thing, but passengers with those small cases seem to have no spacial awareness or common sense.

I'd also make it an offense to stop abruptly, for any reason, at the end of a moving walkway or escalator, at the top of a staircase (or stationary escalator) or at the doors of a train.

I'd love to ban stupid people too, but there would be a detrimental effect on revenue.

 

[DaveNewcastle]

I'd ban those stupid small trolley case things (Click here for an example). I think wheels on large and heavy luggage is a good thing, but . . . . .

ah, yes!
Those cases!

As used by very many guards and crew leaders on the ECML!
Hmmm.

But I know what you mean - they and their users are a hazard.

 

[Oswyntail]

Allow smoking on "open platforms" as Scotrail do.....

Also some provision for smokers on The Sleeper Services.

Presumably you mean introduce "open platforms" for weed addicts between the coaches, as seen in any railway in a western film
Yee hah!

 

[DXMachina]

That would be awesome

Or have a smoking area in a DVT with added toplight windows and 'barbecue tables'...

 

[Eagle]

Or have a smoking handcar. :P

 

[Butts]

Presumably you mean introduce "open platforms" for weed addicts between the coaches, as seen in any railway in a western film
Yee hah!

Marlboro Man rides again.....

A vestibule aka Trans-Siberian Express would do !!
--- old post above --- --- new post below ---

Or have a smoking handcar. :P

With a bar will be a hit

 

[Tomonthetrain]

Why wait till the next stop ? - moving would be just fine

Hopefully at 125 miles per hour

 

[tsr]

Hopefully at 125 miles per hour

What about HS1?

 

[Tomonthetrain]

What about HS1?

125 minimum then!

 

[Xenophon PCDGS]

All trains must be Pacers!!!

I think you have missed out the two words "in Hell" after "trains" and before "must" in your posting....

Failing that, replace "in Hell" with an even better phrase of "departing from and arriving at all major London railway stations"

 

[TrainBoy98]

What about HS1?

Not fast enough! they must be taken to america and throw infront of a Rocket Sled...

 

[LNW-GW Joint]

Ban 'audio graffiti'.
And by that I mean; 'security announcements', 'safety announcements', lists of things sold at the buffet/cafe-bar/shop, reminders to take my personal belongings with me when I leave the train and reminders to mind the gap between the train and the platform edge.

And all our trains and stations are non smoking...
And all passengers are reminded to put litter in the bins provided....
I discovered recently that this message is linked to the "gap between train and platform" one on ATW's 175s, so you get both at Earlestown and Helsby, among many others (despite Earlestown platforms having been totally rebuilt...).
And Deganwy is a request stop...(long useless sentence about passengers wishing to alight should contact the guard, to permit the train to stop, to allow them to alight).
You surely only need this announcement at all at Llandudno Junction (not at Manchester Oxford Road!).
This is bad enough on the Manchester-Llandudno service, but on the Cambrian and Central Wales lines which have many request stops it is truly mind-numbing.

 

[hairyhandedfool]

....I discovered recently that this message is linked to the "gap between train and platform" one on ATW's 175s, so you get both at Earlestown and Helsby, among many others (despite Earlestown platforms having been totally rebuilt...)....

You will get that announcement at Earlestown for as long as ATW use the sharply curved platforms.

....And Deganwy is a request stop...(long useless sentence about passengers wishing to alight should contact the guard, to permit the train to stop, to allow them to alight).
You surely only need this announcement at all at Llandudno Junction (not at Manchester Oxford Road!).....

But that would be useless if they can't get to the guard between Llandudno Junction and Deganwy, much better to tell people earlier.